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AboutDon’t wanna work anymore just wanna sleep all day and do drugs
Joined devRant on 9/22/2020
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Things I didn't know existed, but now do because of devrant:
1 - calico dicks
2 - naughty trolling C devs that are girls
3 - dev elitists (actual elitists, not just trolls)
4 - superior German devs
5 - starving webdevs
6 - angular anger
7 - forum spam wars
8 - super shitters
9 - pedophile game devs who get banned
10 - you shouldn't say your mom to people because sometimes people's moms are dead21 -
Old employer sends you a message on WhatsApp 4 weeks after you left asking for your help because they cannot figure out a NEW issue with one of the application servers.
What do you reply? Do you even reply?
(I’m now freelance and charge £70/hr)20 -
Gene Hackman and his wife and dog all found dead.
He was like 95 or something. She was 63. Daughter said she suspects a gas leak.
Much sad, RIP to the legend, the OG Lex Luther12 -
think people should be talking about responsibility instead of "altruism" or trying to shame people for not being selfless enough or how some selfish motivation for being selfless means it's invalid... zzzz. seems so self destructive8
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WordPress, even though you presumably don't have any physical form, I am going to find you.
And when I find you I am going to shove all of these vegetables up your ringpiece, one by one.
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A backend dev just told A frontend dev via slack that documentation is not necessary for backend and provided a backend PR for backend feature the frontend dev needed, he said the implementation is easy, am I dreaming or what the he'll is going on here 😩😩
Guess what ? the entire backend has no documentation 🤣🤣🤣🤣, just search the PRs you frontend freaks 😜, I feel sorry for my friend 🤣🤣🤣6 -
depending on where you are and when you read it should be ok but anyway happy new year from here =]1
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When I search for problems with npm libraries and StackOverflow's answer is
"just downgrade the package to {VERSION} and it should work"
It makes me wanna die. How in the clusterfuck is that an acceptable solution?5 -
how to be a shitty client:
- have a legacy database where column names are misspelled and everything is nullable
- hire external help which instead of helping break the ui (bonus points for breaking the api too)
- demand a very much custom auth logic but decide to use aws cognito for shits and giggles
- demand 1hr daily meetings
- demand biometric auth with 0 knowledge of how biometric auth works (the previous devs just had a face id prompt which does nothing and retrieved email and password saved on the device???)
- message me at 2am because you don't understand how timezones work + demand a build while you're at it
- call me a "heretical pagan" because i took a day off on a holiday you don't celebrate (???)
i could go on but i think this is enough11 -
Caffeine meets every criteria for being a drug:
- Alters mental state
- Addictive
- Has withdrawal symptoms
- Tolerance increases with time
If you rely on caffeine to function, statistically, you spend the majority of your waking life in caffeine crush, longing for more and more caffeine to just function normally.
Face it: you’re a drug addict. Caffeine being legal doesn’t mean it’s not a drug.
I don’t do caffeine at all. I don’t drink sodas that have caffeine, I don’t drink tea either. That’s why I’m always full of energy. Yes, caffeine withdrawal gave me a week of terrible headaches, but I pushed through, and now my life is completely transformed.36 -
Hiring Manager: Thanks for interviewing for the position. But the things we listed as "nice to haves" are actually required for the job so we aren't going to hire you.7
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So apparently, there's a "leaked" recording of the AWS CEO telling software devs to stop coding and be prepared for the day when "AI takes over software development."
Can someone point me in the direction of the AWS Headquarters?
*cocks shotgun*
I just wanna talk16 -
tl : "hey dotenv, we have a presentation with VP tomorrow, do you want to present any of your achievements in product?"
me: "umm, what achievements ?"
tl : "you know, something that you added in app which made a good impact to various metrics like DAU, MAU, less bad reviews etc"
me: "umm... i coded the tasks and features created by you folks. they got shipped at some point of your liking, and are now being tracked by you for its success failure. So i am not sure what to take credit for"
TL: "no, no.. i mean like any bugs or issues that you fixed outside of your daily jira tasks which you tracked to be a sucess"
me: "well as far as tracking is concerned, then neither i know how to track them nor i did. but yea, i identified a bug where an outdated payload was generating bad request and giving a silent failure instead of success which recently got shipped. maybe its helping users get actual response instead of "we will get back to you in some time" , so this might get considered?
TL : "oh that? that we have already added as one of the team's achievements (=PM+TL's achievement) and have tracked it to be a succes"
me : "what th- okay. then how about that api failure which was identified by AVP as "something is not right" in which the api was intermittently taking a long time to respond. he tagged me and i set up logs to identify which type of users got that issue and the actual cause of that api failure. that was definitely a good fox for app as we ended up with good reviews on playstore for our new release?"
TL : "oh that? how can you take credit for that fix? it was identified by AVP, you just added similar logs that we were using for tracking errors and implemented a fix when it came to you as a sprint task? its a team achievement"
me : "but you guys didn't identified the cause through your logs!? my log was more granular. and even if that's the case, we aren't allowed to pick any task just as is, without getting it added to sprint , right?"
TL : "nah, that was a team win"
*6 months later, during appraisal time"
TL : "Hey dotenv, you haven't displayed any leadership skills and haven't gone put of the box to improve the product. Here's your peanut appraisal 🗑️"
me : 🥲🔫🤯🪦
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fuck this stupid neaurocrst structure. i hate being a selfish prick than a team player, but either give credits as well as punishment to the team or gove credits as well as punishment to the single person. but wtf is thos culture of giving reward to team and punishment to individual? fckin communists
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