Implementing the application exactly like the client specified, because they won't listen.

IT description of remote access tool on IT wiki page:
"Support for latest Mac and Windows release"

Also same page:
"macOS Mojave is not yet supported (...) Please do not upgraded until instructed"

No comments...

Guess I'm moving to Bel-Air then...

Slack update notes are by far the funniest out there.

My girlfriend knows what a coder needs when it’s their birthday. Lucky to have her. Walked into my room and it was set up like this.

Absolutely!

Learn tar without googling.

My wife came home from her baby shower with this onesie. It made me so happy.

macOS treats chess like it's the System32 file in windows

Yesterday, my employer promoted me to lead web developer.

I’m still the only web developer.

I fucked up hard for the first time yesterday at work.

Came in and expected a huge speech from the bossman.

He called me to his office:

Explained me where I went wrong and what I should do next time with a big smile on his face!

Got call from extremely angry customer, our product is shit and doesn't work. At all. Important customer so I went to visit.

He had the perfect setup, our product to the left, our competitor's to the right.

He connected the Ethernet cable to their product, it worked. He plugged it out and connected to ours... Nothing. Shit.

I started to debug on the premises, took logs, everything. It seemed like our product didn't receive any data at all. What the fuck? Tried everything, debugged low level, still nothing. Sweating as hell.

After two hours I got a strange feeling. So I swapped place, our product to the right, competitor's to the left. Now OUR product worked, competitor's zilch.

THE FUCKING ETHERNET CABLE HAD A GLITCH. IF YOU BENT IT TO THE RIGHT IT WORKED, IF YOU BENT IT TO THE LEFT IT WAS BROKEN.

I had never seen a customer be this embarrassed in my life. He apologized to me, my boss, his boss, the Queen, everyone.

We got the contract.

My Dev environment today.

This is where US's bandwith is going

So I just wrote a Ruby script to encrypt some files in AES.

I started it, it's designed to show the key when it's finished. It encrypted 7 files, then Kaspersky pops up and deletes my entire Ruby installation.

okeh

I got this from a page in fisbuk

Is it an achievement?

When you live long enough to become the villain.

4 out of 3 people struggle with Maths.

This is true.

I printed my entire GitHub

If you cannot lotion yourself

What’s the most efficient algorithm to find duplicates in a set?

An SO moderator

As a programmer, I'm outraged.

This is the best thing I've seen all week.

Is he… you know… *clips through the floor* a Bethesda developer

When you look at the old projects you abandoned on github

Amazon Drive offers the most comprehensive data redundancy known to mankind.

"Your data synced. A LOT."™

My biggest dev sin is not writing any unit tests for devRant :/

Code comments be like....