Storytime!

Manager: Hey fullstackchris, the maps widget on our app stopped working recently...

Dev: (Skeptical, little did he know) Sigh... probably didn't raise quota or something stupid... Logs on to google cloud console to check it out...

Google Dashboard: Your bill.... $5,197 (!!!!!!) Payment method declined (you think?!)

Dev: 😱 WTF!?!?!! (Calls managers) Uh, we have HUGE problem, charges for $5000+ in our google account, did you guys remove the quota limits or not see any limit reached warnings!?

Managers: Uh, we didn't even know that an API could cost money, besides, we never check that email account!

Dev: 🤦‍♂️ yeah obviously you get charged, especially when there have literally been millions of requests. Anyway, the bigger question is where or how our key got leaked. Somewhat started hammering one of the google APIs with one of our keys (Proceeds to hunt for usages of said API key in the codebase)

Dev: (sweating 😰) did I expose an API key somewhere? Man, I hope it's not my fault...

Terminal: grep results in, CMS codebase!

Dev: ah, what do we have here, app.config, seems fine.... wait, why did they expose it to a PUBLIC endpoint?!

Long story short:

The previous consulting goons put our Angular CMS JSON config on a publicly accessible endpoint.

WITH A GOOGLE MAPS API KEY.

JUST CHILLING IN PLAINTEXT.

Though I'm relieved it wasn't my fault, my faith in humanity is still somewhat diminished. 🤷‍♂️

Oh, and it's only Monday. 😎

Cheers!

Ok so don't answer the question then?

Pretty sure I'm losing braincells while reading product reviews.

Ever used your friend who knows nothing about cs as a rubber duck? Like you call for a coffee and you just sit there, try to explain the whole thing and then... Ok i need to go, i found the solution, talk to you soon

Linux is only free if your time has no value.

!rant

Girlfriend decided she wants to learn to code, and I am honestly both excited to teach her, but also nervous; Teaching something is a good way to find out just how much you don’t know.

I hate making things pretty too.

Sometimes I think that clients see devs as magicians.

It's like we just put a white blanket on the pc and then *poof*, an app is magically created instantly.

We are like DEVid Blaine.

A friend was writing a small game. He asked me to take a look at why the FPS where horrible although he was only drawing the background each tick.

He had about 10 different images that were used to draw the background tiles. Each iteration of the game loop he would loop over all tile positions, determine which image to use for this tile, load the image from disk and create a new tile using the image, which then would be drawn and forgot.

Loving my new Mi A1. Budget smartphone king I tell you!

So true
https://facebook.com/TheCrazyProgra...

When you get high on validation

That's StackOverflow for you.

Found this on twitter. Literally spat out my drink 😂😂😂

I'm crying-

And idk if I'm crying from it being so funny or so sad...

Forwarded to me by my boss, found somewhere on the internet, creds to who made it

Doing a straight-forward "if" seems too complicated. Let's reverse the logic.

With all these posts about the death of Steven Hawkings there's one thing which may be overlooked:

LETSENCRYPT WILDCARDS ARE LIVE !!!!!!!

(No offense to Steven Hawkings. He truly was one of the greatest scientists of mankind.)

Web development explained with butt analogies

Absolute madman

Nothing excites me more than a beautiful, simple and logical piece of code...
Sometimes I even feel like a creep with that obsession.
Am I the only one here?

When you're hardcore full-stack

I am DONE with this woman CONTINUED!

I didn't think I'd have to put another rant about this stupidity at least not this soon but she just keeps on giving!

I have my noise canceling headphones on most of the time and when I want to hear the people around, I just put the right earcup of it to the side of my ear so the music pauses. Today we had a huge disrupt on our services because of a network switch error on the hub. I was also trying to focus on my coding as I didn't wanna do a stupid mistake on the last working day and be sorry about it in the next week.

So this woman sneaks up on me from behind calling my name - meaning she has a question, surprise! -, I say 'yes' moving my head to her side ever so slightly without getting my eyes off of my screen stating subtly that I'm also listening to her while trying to focus on my shit. She starts yelling at me 'look at me!' out of nowhere! I turn my head and ask what the problem is and she asks why I'm not looking at her face! Stupid moron, I might not be too good in understanding your way of communication but you are the one asking so you WILL wait if you'd like to hear answers.

I say I'm working on something and her answer is again 'Why aren't you looking at my face it's going to be quick bla bla did we do this like that?' and I answered I didn't remember because there's no way I'd ever remember without looking further and it was no lie.

This woman clearly has stability issues and everyone else seem to be tolerating it. It's now obvious as I'm not tolerating the nonsense I'll be the one that 'she only has ever had a problem with'.

I was quick to de escalate the situation but now I'm thinking maybe I should've responded in a way that she could understand. I wouldn't ever give a shit about it but this is getting ridiculous.

- No I wont give you a ballpark estimate.
- No I wont grab a cup of coffee to discuss your idea
- No I wont check out your existing app/website

I'm a professional and my time is actually what I'm selling. If you want me to spend my time on you then you better spend yours to persuade me.

Send me a brief, your research on competitors, your roadmap, a deck, whatever. I'll probably won't read any of it. But at least I'll now that you you mean business and you value and respect my time.

never again wifi problems 😍

Back to work from extended holiday and feels like I forgot how to code

Alright, since Facebook released a VPN service a little while ago but they're actively advertising it as a secure and privacy friendly service, I felt like - although I'm very busy right now - I should do a security/privacy blog post about this.

If you even slightly care about your own privacy or the privacy of anyone you're communicating with, for the love of God, don't use this service.

Hereby a blog post explaining stuffs: https://much-security.nl//...

It would be nice if everybody could just leave me the FUCK alone and let me work.
Goddammit!

I am so fucking done with all these incompetent fucktards!!! Why would you keep a client-brief in secret from your colleagues?! Why on your screwed delusional Earth you think it is perfectly okay if you don’t communicate the changes ahead your team? How could you - microbrained prehistoric dinosaur who petrified to your own semen - think that I can estimate with my time and do my work when you are barely able to think ahead 2 minutes without letting me know the actual scope and deadlines???!!! AND NO telling me the day before NOT GONNA MAKE IT VALID!!!! You failed in life you failed in evolution you played my trust and I don’t give horseshit about your career! Go fuck a hedgehog, eat it and shit out on the same fucking day. Tomorrow a new era starts and prepare yourself as I am hereby vow that I am not going to care any of your bullshit! I vow that every time you come to me with a new task, I will start it WHEN I can and do it between 9 and 17 and if anyone asks I will calmly tell the hard truth about the overbred, human shaped, evolutional dead end you are...

My most successful project? The next one.

If that doesn't happen, read this again.

Incompetent doesn't even start to describe this one:

1. Uses Google drive instead of an online repository for code sharing
2. Uses multiple files instead of version control
3. Preferred variable names like a, a1, b, temp
4. Didn't like "wasting" space. The result was unreadable unindented code
5. Would rather use deprecated HTML tags rather than proper CSS styling

He was more like the personification of bad coding practices

After 2 interviews and an make home and pitch project...

'Sorry we were not really looking for a new frontend developer'

Like... How?!?!