Just told my dad that python 3.6 launched yesterday, he asked me if i wanted it for christmas 😅

When you install Java it says "3 billion devices run java"

Well I'm not sure how many of those devices actually respond

Interviewer: "I checked your Github, your side projects look very interesting! Tell me about your other hobbies."

Me: "other hobbies?"

Spaces or tabs? - Semicolons!

Everyone always says the previous developer was crap, sometimes you're right

Have you ever wondered we programmers have so many strong communities.... Stackoverflow, devRant, Reditt, etc...
No other profession has such communities... Why? Why?
Because, we haven't built one for them.... 😂😁

My friend had managed to move up viewport with pure javascript...

Dev confession.
Everybody in my department thinks I am a genius programmer.
I am just a better googler who knows how to apply things.

I went to Paris for my first interview (that was 1989) for a job of Unix kernel developer. All dressed up. I step out of the elevator and see a young punk with scruffy hair and different colour shoes. I reckon he must be the pizza delivery guy. I ask him "dude, can you please point me to the CEO's office for interview". He said "sure, follow me man, I'll show you". We arrive at a desk, he sat down in the big chair and looks at me with a big smile and says "Ok dude, here we are. I am the CEO. Now let's see how good you are!"
I got the job. And 26 years latet, last week, amazing coincidence: I met him again at a trade show in Paris ... with the same coloured shoes. How cool is that!!!

Time changes too fast...

Spend half an hour finding music to listen to while I code; Pause it after 30 seconds to concentrate on refactoring. Stays paused for rest of day.

Really getting the most out of those expensive new headphones.

Thanks @dfox for adding the double tap to upvote feature, I mean, bug. You're a saint

Thank God they named it DevRant, not BitchBucket

This day is the worst ever, I can't do anything. I feel useless and Im much less productive than I use to be.

I hate it when I forget me headphones at home

colleague: AWS is facing some network issue.

me: But I see you are able to SSH into EC2 instances.

colleague: Well, I am running my nodejs app on 8080 but can't access it over the Internet. Works fine on my laptop though.

me: ec2_prod ~# netstat | grep node
lolol -> 127.0.0.1:8080 node

Turns out it was running on localhost IP. Worked fine on his laptop though.

I am 52. I think I am the oldest ranter. This deserves a sticker no doubt!

What do you call a party with developers?

A git together

I'm so sorry.

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

My girlfriend dumped me after I named a class after her. She felt I treated her like an object.

marriage programmed!

I love programming

If I could impress girls with my Java skills, I would still be single.

What language do you hate the most and why is it Java?