Anyone else hate the phrase "as soon as possible" with a passion from the mouth of a client? I feel like saying it'll be f*cking done when it's done. Yes you're important but so is everyone else. Be patient, you only asked me to do it 3 hours ago. Just because of that, you've now gone to the back of the queue.

So I bought a LattePanda off Kickstarter last year and only just put it in its new home. Struggling to think what to do with it. At the moment I only use it for streaming video. It's got an Arduino chip in it. What would you guys use it for?

Grumpy cat was in a lot of our internal products, on loading screens and what not, because why not? PM got pissed and said if he sees that fucking cat again blah blah blah. Grumpy cat is now summoned with a Konami code. Grumpy cat will never die.

First proper software dev job, very naive, tasked to write a 'soft switch' for a well known companies set of production lines, depending on what product was being produced at a particular time. Wrote it weeks before the deadline, forgot about it, night before I had a quick review and realised I had missed half the spec aaaand it was going live the following day. Shitting myself I pulled an all nighter, drove to the office at 5am, managed to get it done with minutes to spare for 9am. To my knowledge it's still being used today. I left shortly after that.

So I've developed a nice looking website for a client after designs were approved and what not. After seeing it in the flesh, the the client is now trying her hand at redesigning it herself in WORD. I am so done.

Oh teh noes! I best 'repaire' my phone as the battery is severely damaged! Who the hell even does this crap. Shame on them. Like how they used the Android alert UI when they can clearly detect that I'm using an iPhone.

Since when was having 3 spinner styles and 2 pop ups styles a good idea in a SaaS? This baby needs a proper spruce up. I must admit it's not really a rant, I enjoy it, decrapifying the code and general refactoring. This is from a hackathon a good couple of years ago. Finally giving it some TLC. Feels amazing.

Why can't recruiters tell I don't want to play. I've confused myself with my own code and now you're yapping in my ear about candidates wanting to join the company. Go away. Email recruitment@ with a CV. I don't wanna speak to you.

Google and Stack Overflow are your best friends. Always backup. Don't drop databases accidentally.

This is an old rant from over 10 years ago in my first job at 19. I was tasked with turning off one of our clients email because they had left the company. Easy enough, logged into cPanel, job done. Later that day I get a phone call from the clients company asking if there was a problem with the email. No I said, everything should be fine, I did remove a 'joe.bloggs@blah.com' email address as instructed because... *reading job bag*... they had left the company. The client then said, that's my email you've turned off and hung up. Turned out he had been fired and no one told him. I felt horrible. I will always remember that conversation 😓

Oh you're sick but you've decided to come into the office when you could've worked from home. Thank you for the gift of the plague.

A site like moonpig.com with a < £350/$430 budget.

Seriously going to make submit buttons only work if you double click them. Jokes, I disable after the first click, I disable... 🙄

When your MD tells you that a piece of software you wrote years ago and hate to death supporting because it's been bastardised by the client that many times is being outsourced and replaced by a third party

New stickers or devRant goggles...

Can anyone explain why in JS this >= when written like => works in some browsers and not others? What is the latter? Other than an incorrect syntax when doing a comparison of greater than or equal to?

When a customer moans about a site not working in an old version IE. I bet they have their steak well done when ordering in a restaurant too.

Who ever does this crap needs to be named and shamed!

The furniture plugin for your favourite grid system

That smug moment when you've just come back off holiday and reel off all the awesome shit you got up to during the scrum stand up meeting 😏

!rant I'm lucky to work with 2 of the best back-enders in my career. We were royally pushed/screwed over today due to PM's last minute demands for a phone app that they were demoing to 1000's at a conference. Guess what, certain elements broke. But the guys jumped in to get the API fixed. It's a bit much being the only phone dev on the team but with such strong backend support, it makes it a pleasure to come into work. You know who you guys are. Thank you. Remember a little support makes all the difference in the workplace.

When you try and compile for iOS using TACO and you get an error message about an android icon file missing *wears the wtf hat*

When the work network goes down during BF4 at lunch. That's the main reason why we have fibre broadband.

When you have high performance set, yet your lame CPU won't get above 0.75Ghz, so you have to constantly reboot to hit the 3.50Ghz jackpot