Details
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AboutBackend developer
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SkillsPython/Flask, JavaScript, PHP, Java, MySQL
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LocationLagos, Nigeria
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Github
Joined devRant on 1/28/2018
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So I have somehow created schrödinger's cat in my program. If you observe what is happening, it works. But if you stop observing it, it starts corrupting.
If I put any print statement in it, it works. But if I have no print statements at all, it produces corrupted data. Doesn't matter what or when I'm printing.
I'm guessing its there's some fuckery going on with stdin/stdout and buffers. Even though the data coming to and from stdin/stdout should not affect the output.10 -
Remember how I told y’all to spread pez all over me and fuck me like you hate me? Well…
Someone just did it.6 -
An intern I was supposed to lead (as an intern) and work with. Which sounded kinda crazy to me, but also fun so I rolled with it. But when I met her I quickly found out she didn't even have a coding editor installed and when I advised one she was "scared of virusses". She had Microsoft Edge in her toolbar, and some picture of a cat as a background. We were given some project by our boss, and a freelance programmer helped us set it up on Trello. Great, lets start! Oke maybe first some R&D, she had to reaeach how to use the Twilio API. After catching her on WhatsApp a few times I realised this wasnt gonna go anywere. After a few weeks of coding and posting a initial project to git I asked her if she could show me the code of the API she made so far..
She told me she was using the quickstart guide (the last 3 FUCKING weeks) which contained some test project with specific use cases.
The one that I did 3 weeks ago that same fucking morning.
AND SHE WAS STILL NOT DONE...
A few days later I asked her about the progress (strangly, I wasn't allowed ti give her another task bcs the freelanc already did) and guess what... She got fking pissed at me
Her: "I will come to you when im done, ok?"
Me: "I just want to see how it is going so far and if you are running into any problems!"
Her: "I dont want to show you right now"
She then goes to my fucking boss to tell him I am bothering her.
And omg... Please dear god please kill me now...
Instead of him saying the she probably didn't do shit. He says to me that the girl thinks im looking down on her and she needs a stress free environment to work in. She will show me when its done. ITS A FUCKING QUICKSTART GUIDE YOU DUMB BITCH.
He then procceeded to whine to me about the email template (another project I do at the same time) which didn't look perfect in all of his clients.
Dont they understand that I am not a frontend developer? Can you stop please? I know nothing about email templates, I told you this!!!
Really... the whole fucking internship the only thing the girl did was ask people if they want more tea. Then she starts cleaning the windows, talk to people for an hour, or clean everyone's dask.
all this while I already made 50% of the fucking product and she just finished the quickstart tutorial 😭. Truly 2 months wasted, and the worse thing is I didn't get any apprication. They constantly blamed me and whined at me. Sometimes for being 3 minutes late, the other for smoking too much, or because I drink to much coffee, or that I dont eat healthy. They even forced me to play Ping Pong. While im just trying to do my job. One of the worst things they got mad at me for if when my laptop got hacked bcs it was infected with some virus. He had remote access and bought 5 iPhones 6's with my paypal while I was on break. I had to go home and quickly reset all my passwords and make sure the iPhones wouldnt get delivered. strange this was, this laptop I only used at the company. So it must have been software I had to download there. Probably phpstorm (torrent). Bcs nobody would give me a license. And the freelancer said I * have to *.
the monday after I still had to reinstall windows so I called them and said I would be late. when I came they were so disrepectfull and didn't understand anything. It went a little like this:
Boss: why u late?
Me: had to reinstall my laptop, sorry.
Boss: why didnt you do this in your own time?
Me: well, I didn't have any time.
Boss: cant you do this in the weekend or something? Because now we have to pay you several hours bcs you downloaded something at home.
Me: I am only using this laptop for work so thats not possible.
Boss: how can that even be possible? You are not doing anything at home with your laptop? Is that why you never do anything at home?
Me: uhm, I have desktop computer you know. Its much faster. And I also need to rest sometimes. Areeb (freelancer) told me to torrent the software. He gave me the link. 2 days later this happends
Boss: Ahh okeee I see.. Well dont let it happen again.
After that nobody at the compamy trusted me with anything computer related. Yes it was my own fault I downloaded a virus but it can happen to anyone. After that I never used Windows again btw, also no more auto login apps.8 -
I'm actually in the middle of an impossible deadline and I just needed a break. I'm in a third world country that basically doesn't have any decent internet infrastructure. But that isn't really the problem. The problem was that we couldn't really learn online for a long while and once we had that going, all the CS teachers decided that we should be doing our final, defensible projects within 2 weeks notice (even though we didn't really have the time or the appropriate knowledge to do it) and so it was all basically a struggle where you'd have 3 or less days to shit out some kind of program for one subject and then immediately get to work on another. At this point I might just need a gap year...
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So apparently it’s been an unresolved issue in IntelliJ for the past 4 years that sometimes debugging gradle tasks just fails silently. Found a number of workarounds online for old versions but they since removed the options in settings that fixed the issue? Fuck you jetbrains
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Would you like to smile for 10 seconds? Read this short story:
*Story begins*
During World War II, numerous fighter planes were getting hit by anti-aircraft guns. Air Force officers wanted to add some protective armour/shield to the planes.
The question was "where"?
The planes could only support few more kilos of weight. Mathematicians were called for a short consulting project.
Fighter planes returning from missions were analysed for bullet holes per square foot.
They found 1.93 bullet holes/sq. foot near the tail of planes whereas only 1.11 bullet holes/sq. foot close to the engine.
The officers thought that since the tail portion had the greatest density of bullets, it would be the logical location for putting an anti-bullet shield.
A mathematician said exactly the opposite; more protection is needed where the bullet holes aren't - that is -around the engines.
His judgement surprised everyone. He said "He said We are counting the planes that returned from a mission. Planes with lots of bullet holes in the engine did not return at all".
Moral: Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted, counts.
Source: From the book -
"How Not To Be Wrong", by Jordan Ellenberg.4 -
Programming has taught me that time is a valuable and under appreciated resource.
if a task is repeated multiple times per week / month, you have at your finger tips the ability to automate the hell out of it and let your computer deal with the task instead.rant don't waste time dealing with mundane shit automate it wk202 repeated manual tasks let the computer do what it does best1 -
Lmao I’ve never learned how to program. I’m just winging it and have been able to fool everyone the last 10 years.
Senior engineer checking in.11 -
Being a newbie is getting harder and harder. The later you start in a field, the more has already covered in that field, meaning you have to run as much more to catch up.6
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Why do websites have to make their html so fucking hard and complicated to read with something like beautifulsoup. Like I just want to scrape your data. Fuck your embedded iframes and div lists. Why must you do this I JUST WANT YOUR DATA16
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70% of the population see's you as a scammer. You will have to explain to your family every single day what you actually do and still they will be suspecting you. The annoying part of this , is the fact that literates even think you are a scammer.
Welcome to Nigeria.10 -
Pretty much after couple of years of entering the real world I lost faith, not because I found myself not able to cope and learn but the amount of chaos and closed minded people that you face everyday pushed me to pursue my MBA.
Now I'm slowly drifting away to the management part because I've had enough with this, its just not worth it. I'll keep development for self entertainment in personal projects, and nothing more. -
This guy is a programmer for sure, he thinks he made a great product, but it's unnecessary and inefficient 😯6
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I told my lead, "I am creating a new Algorithm" instead of "I am trying to fix this", and instantly I am a programming wizard :D :D :D6
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If I wouldn't have studied computer science my second choice might have been astronomy. Dang, space is so fascinating. Love watching documentaries about it when I go to bed :o11
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Why doesn't Twitter have a public API without authentication for simple stuff, such as reading tweets. One can do that without logging in on the website, why shouldn't code be able to do it.5
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Person: What's more common than
c² = a² + b² ?
Me: Clients saying,
"I know how to do it myself but I just don't have time"
Source : twitter.com2 -
15 mins after finding out a critical bug (we are releasing 3 days from now)
Me: Have u found the root cause of the bug?
Teammate: Yes
Me: So, are we fucked?
Teammate: Teammate is typing...
Me:
*Closes chat window*
*Locks the computer*
*Flies back to home country*3 -
Remember the rule of 20:
After every 20 mins, look 20 feets away, for 20 seconds.
No eye issues in the future.20