I have 7 days to convince my company to lay me off.

Trying to get severance after finding a better job?

@YourMom yes. Shamelessly.

Make a tape w/ a 7 day countdown theme.

/* Yes... 'リング' joke... */

@D-4got10-01 like a video?

I think we should set events and review outcomes:

1. Start talking to yourself and making hand gestures in the air. When someone addresses you then tell the invisible person next to you to "shut up".

2. Start playing music loud that has antiwork themes.

3. Keep bringing TPS reports to your manager and demand he reads them.

4. Brag about your output in the restroom.

5. Burp and fart loudly, especially at meetings.

6. Start creating workplace rumors about other people leaving.

7. Start crying uncontrollably about missing everyone when they get laid off.

I don't know, just random weird shit I though about. Maybe not a way to leave a lasting impression.

@YourMom ouh are we talking subversion and sabotage? Don't look further

Erase the production database. Say you misclicked. Oopsie. It's so obvious than nobody will suspect a thing.

@YourMom > 'I think we should set events and review outcomes'.

I'm sure at least some of those would yield desired results.

Get caught wanking during a meeting? Say you shared company code to someone? Hit on the HR lady/boss's wife

Dunno check your contract

not sure about your companies/contracts, but afaik most don't pay severance for code of conduct violation related firing

the DB drop idea has the plausible denialability at least

Just remembered this bit: https://youtu.be/AA7a5SSQ_BY . Sleep w/ CEO's wife, have him kick your ass, make bank on the settlement?

/jk

tas in the office.