devRant - A fun community for developers to connect over code, tech & life as a programmer

Details

Skills

Python, Django, HTMl, CSS, JavaScript
Location

India
Website

http://valaparthvi.github.io
Github

valaparthvi

Joined devRant on 5/7/2018

173

Three male programmers were in the bathroom standing at the urinals.

The first programmer finishes, walks over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeds to dry his hands very carefully. He uses paper towel after paper towel and ensures that every single spot of water on his hands is dried.

Turning to the other two, he says, "At Windows, we are trained to be extremely thorough."

The second programmer finishes his task at the urinal and he proceeds to wash his hands. He uses a single paper towel and makes sure that he dries his hands using every available portion of the paper towel.

He turns and says, "At Macintosh not only are we trained to be extremely thorough but we are also trained to be extremely efficient."

The third programmer finished and walks straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder.

"At RedHat, we don`t PISS on our hands."

undefined apple red hat linux windows

11
62

Not sure if CoreOS folks are laughing or crying (CoreOS -> Red Hat -> IBM)

rant
34

And also which language to use ...

joke/meme

2
30

I don't swear while in office.
I don't swear while at home.
It takes me about an hour to get home, during that time tho ...

rant

6
103

How lazy they are ...

joke/meme

7
65

I was signing up on Twitch...
I was in a hurry...
Goddamn that CAPTCHA...
After fucktillion attempts...
I came to terms with the fact that I am a robot...

rant captcha error

7
225

I said camel toe instead camel case in a meeting today...

rant

17
51

After 5 years of neglect I have finaly found some time to work on an old project of mine.

Not a bad view to work from either

rant

9
27

START NEW PROJECT:

<body class="container">
<h1>HELL WORLD</h1>
</body>

rant

6
257

I am not expert but what kind of UX writing is this.
Do they think this is cool ?

rant yassssss?

29
340

I just realized i haven't left my home in 4 days.

If i die, please commit my code before calling an ambulance.

rant working remotely

16
377

Interview

HR: So .. tell us .. where do you see our AI acting in 5 years?

ME: Doing your job minus the stupid questions.

*silence*

Boss breaks out in laughter.
"Oh boy you're hired"

joke/meme rant ai interview

12
90

Was at my sisters place a little ago and somehow we came at the subject of her laptop.
For everyone who thinks I'm posting this solely to hate on windows, I'm not. This really happened and if you don't believe it, well, so be it, I guess.
Also keep in mind that's she's using a stock version without anything except for word and itunes installed.

She got it a couple of years ago and I dual booted it for her (windows + ubuntu). I fully expected her to use windows because of office and outlook etc.

Asked her anyways:

Me: So, you've got dual boot, although I think already know the answer, what system do you use mostly? (I didn't even consider that there was a possibility that the answer would be ubuntu or linux)
Sister: Ubuntu!
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: 😵
Me: Sorry, what? You're not using windows as primary system?!
Sister: No. It at first takes that motherfucking system about 5 minutes to reach the FUCKING LOGIN SCREEN.
Me: Ow, that's bad :/
Me: *turns laptop on and indeed, it takes a fuckton of time*
Me: Is the password still the same as when I set it up for you?
Sister: Yesss.
Me: *types the password, it's working, loading screen appears*
Sister: Would you like a coffee?
Me: Uhm.... sure? But that would take you about 10-15 minutes to make.......?
Sister: Yes. And that's exactly how long it takes before that fucking piece of shit called windows has finally loaded the FUCKING DESKTOP.
Me: 😅
Me: Okay but it can't be that bad, right? I mean, I hate windows but you mostly need it for studies and such and as you know I'm not judging you for tha......
Sister: YES IT IS THAT FUCKING BAD. WHEN I'M IN CLASS, IT TAKES HALF THE FUCKING CLASS TO LOAD BEFORE I CAN OPEN WORD OR WHAT-THE-FUCK EVER.
THAT'S WHY I USE UBUNTU PRIMARILY, BECAUSE, ALTOUGH IT'S NOT MY FAVOURITE SYSTEM, IT. JUST. FUCKING. WORKS.

Well, I did definitely NOT see that one coming!

There is some bloatware on there but definitely as bad as what would cause this. Virus scan turned up empty. No. Fucking. Clue.
It's not a gaming laptop or anything but come on, it should run either windows or linux very well.

rant

51
177

...I think not even God knows it.

joke/meme

10
468

My boss came into my room today, sat down and said:

Take your family to the [BIG AMUSEMENT PARK], and please keep the reciepts and give them to me. Spend a couple of hundreds bucks and we will pay.
Thanks for being someone whom I can trust

That made me happy

rant

15
46

😜 arrays

joke/meme arrays arrays start at 0

9
165

When you finally accept that the code will never be bug-free and instead make friends with the uncaught exceptions.

joke/meme

1
504

Me these days

joke/meme devrant

5
12

Watch silicon Valley

random wk107

2
14

As always,

Go to the f***ing toilet and inspiration will pop in your head.

Man, how many times should I post this here? (smirks)

rant wk107

2
12

When situation is dire, an episode or two of Mr Robot or silicon valley helps kick start the mind

rant wk107

3
18

I'm procrastinating until I have more motivation or until the deadline is really close and I have to do it anyways.

rant wk107

2
25

Remind myself that im doing this so my cat can have a good life and go back to work.

rant wk107

4
48

Opens devRant
Reads a few ultrageeky rants
Doesn't understand them, bamboozled
Realises there is so much to be learnt
Goes back motivated

rant wk107

8
675

This is my motivation.

devrant wk107

16
66

Food.... It works every single day and also motivates me to goto the office.

My office is next to a mall.

rant wk107

7
49

My family. Mom was the first person to be proud of the things I was interested in. Then my girlfriend pushed me to finish school(she is my wife and the mother of my child now) but mostly my daughters.

I want them to grow up knowing what their dad does.

I am pretty motivated most of the time though, even for shit that i do not like.

Also...money.....i really fucking like money.

rant wk107

12
41

Guys I really wanna make an avatar and don't have enough points but I've had a good day today and don't have anything to rant about.
You could make my day better by letting me make an avatar? :)

random help the last airbender avatar

6
111

Just found some good stuff 😂😂

joke/meme sql db

4
102

Me: Hey, my laptop (with stickers on it) is in for repair, can't get any work done.
Friend: Oh, that sucks, we going to be delayed launching our app!
... few days later ...
Friend: Hey, did u get it back yet?
Me: They ended up giving me a brand new one cause they couldn't repair it.
Friend: That's awesome man, you got lucky!
Me: F*@$ that, I LOST MY STICKERS!

undefined stickers

7

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