i love programming cz it's fucking awesome

"full stack" means "you'll be doing everything from gathering client requirements through data architecture up to the UI design and of course implementing all of it"

"backend" means "you'll be coding everything from database through server-side code and client-side code including html and css"

"we need you on-site all day every day" means "we have no idea how and why we should use repositories with remote access despite being a company developing an internet app, and we don't trust that you would be working anyway"

"interesting challenging projects" means "the same boring crap as every other company, running on an incredibly botched and dezorganized codebase".

"competitive pay" means "actual pay is around 1.5 times the minimum allowed pay, and everything else is being siphoned off into (stupid and useless) 'benefits' like massage and fitness discount coupons"

"friendly collective having fun at numerous company events each years" means "it is mandatory for you to participate on our weekend drinking retreats but you'll only find out when we fire you because you're 'not a team player' after you refused to participate on those"

A fresh graduate software engineer applied to the company and passed the coding exam.

Manager: Wow you got a very high score. Good job.

Applicant: Thank you sir. So am I hired?

Manager: Yes of course. You will be the team lead for one of the project.

Applicant: Wait wut????

This is so mean

Give that man some HUGE FUCKING COOKIES!

!rant, cool anyway

if (rant.Contains("fuck"))
rant++

!rant
How cool is FreeCodeCamp!!

I can throw an exception further than anyone else...
Just saying

I just love it when my coworkers talk (troll) about Google Ultron like it's the answer for everything in front of a new dev and he's getting more and more confused thinking "what's this awesome Google product I've never heard about"

And we just know that within the next 30 minutes he will have tears in his eyes of laughing after reading the story and probably also has it 'installed' (like some other devs) on his desktop (http://imgur.com/gallery/W9Pnh)

Have a good chuckle if you haven't read it before:
http://imgur.com/gallery/iJD8f
http://imgur.com/a/AOz0d

Don't forget to download your adobe reader guys.

Just me, myself and I ;-)

That rant 😂

Please people! I'm begging you! please use !Rant correctly
! means NOT
!Rant == NOT Rant
You cannot call yourselves developers if you do not understand this simple syntax!

When I see windows rant...

Same goes for my parents... lol

!rant, HTML is the toughest

Well, since you're already here... ;-)

I was told that my comment on another rant needed to be its own rant. So here it is:

I had a client that runs a tattoo shops website to be updated and more modern. He wanted nothing to do with looking at or approve mock ups or designs so I just did my thing and took care of it. Once I was finished I showed him what I had and said “now I just need some content from you all so I can replace all the placeholder text and images”.
He seemed completely onboard. Took down notes of all the content needed, assigned all of it out to his artists to gather what I needed and provide it to me.
After 6 months, and several emails asking if they ever got that content together I finally get a response:
“LOOK MAN, if you didn’t want to do the site then you shouldn’t have accepted the money. I know you don’t need all these from us to finish up, you’re just stalling! I need the site up now!”
So I’m like “Sure man, I’ll publish it exactly as it stands now.”
An hour later I get a call “who are these people in these pictures? Why do you have our pricing all wrong? Why is everything in French or something (Lorem ipsum)? I just need my money back at this point.”
I explained that he’s not getting his money back because I already did my part, but just because it’s important to me that a client is satisfied (and seemingly what he wants is money) I can waive his hosting fee for the next 3 years.
It’s been a year now. Sites still up in all “French”, wrong pricing, random stock photos. Couple weeks ago he called to apologize for being a dick before.
Still haven’t gotten any content to finish up.
I don’t understand. It’s like these people think if you want to publish a book for instance that you just give the publisher the title you came up with and they’ll fill in the pages with story/info for you.
I’m a web developer, not a content manager.

The rant starts here