A nice shirt for Halloween

savage

I’m trying to contribute on his dying forum, and he PM’s me this.

I could replace you with 10 if statements.

Where is that f*cking command!!!

Nike's robots.txt says "just crawl it"

😂😂😂

That's a scary pumpkin

Take me!

I bought a System76 laptop. They're headquartered in the same city where I live. In the "special instructions" section of the checkout process, I put, "I'm buying this because Apple took away my escape key."

This note came today.

A non-techie just asked me this, "when your computer overheats, why does it freeze?"

During an Interview:
- What's your greatest strength?
- Perseverance.
- Ok, thank you, we'll contact you!
- I'll wait here...

O(FUCK)

The best thing about working in Android development is my phone stays always charged

Halloween is right around the corner and I'm getting ready for the trick or treating kids 😂

Me: good day, how can I help you?
Client: *explains issue*
Me: alright, let's take a loo.... *AACHOOOO*
.
.
M: my apologies sir, that came out of nowhe... *ACHOOO*
M: do you have a second sir? My apologies!
C: sure man take your time 😁

*30 seconds later, nose seems to have calmed down*

M: back I am, apologies for the inconvenience!
C: no problem, it happens!
M: where was I?.... Right, I was going t...
*ACHOOOOOOOOOOO*
*ACHOOOOOOO*
AH... AH... AAAAH..... ACHOOOOO*
M: I'm very sorry, I'm going to put you through to a collegue!
*puts through to collegue*
*goes to bathroom*
.
.
*returns to desk*

*tringgggg*
Me: good afternoon sir, how may I hel... *A-MOTHERFUCKING-CHOOOOO* (thinking: oh for fucking fucks sake)
C: bless you!
M: thank you! Apologies, I seem to be having a snee.. *CHOOOOOOOO*
.
.
.
*sniffs a few times*
- zing attack.

*collegue yells at me to transfer my call*
*transfers call*

Me: thanks man, idk what's wrong with me hahah... *ACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*

OH FUCKING HELL 😠

10/10 marketing, tbh

made my day

Sometimes it feels cool to act a troll...

Ok. What. ..?

Burned it 🔥

:/

Student life can be hard ...

Android Developer job ads next week:
* +10 years of experience in Kotlin.
* +3 years developing enterprise level apps using Kotlin.

You write more bugs than code.

If you see someone coding at mcdonalds, starbucks etc.

"Excuse me, would you like a fork for that spaghetti"

Client: Can I speak to the developer responsible for my website?
Developer: Speaking...
Client: You have a deep voice for a 5 year old.

This is a really accurate changelog .

"What took you so long to do it? It looks simple."

"It looks simple because I spent time making it simple."

Zebra next level