Docuware, oh Docuware.

Meant to be an archiving system, but the moment work flows were seen by our director the ball just went out of the court in terms of implementation.

We've gotten to a point where we don't want to use Asana for ticket tracking and task assignment, we don't want to use a tool that acts as a man in the middle to push information to dbs, we want to use workflows with set conditions to automate every single process in the company. Why? It's cheaper.

The syntax is alrightish for arithmetic expressions, but there are so many limitations that we've gotten to the point where we're absolutely circumventing the entire point of the software.

Initialise variables, Condition, condition, condition, draw data from external sheet, process based thereof.

"oh, why doesn't it display images on the populated forms? I don't want it just as an attachment I need to click next to see".

Frustration is paramount, but the light is at the end of the tunnel.

"Oh, did I mention that we need digital signitures?" you need an additional module Mr boss. "no, I bought the cloud bundle. Make it work".

Powerful tool, I'll give it that, but it's downfall is its lack of being comprehensive.

Month 3, here we go.

Haven’t been on here in ages. People still moaning. Found a rant or two with some severe profanity.

A community of somewhat likeminded individuals who at some point have gone through similar experiences.

I’m back it seems.
(Not today, old friend)

Not to hate on jquery at all (as I use it nearly everyday of my life), but I sure felt like this when I started out with it.

Most embarrassing interview rejection was not even in person, it was over the phone.

The company that I was going to work for (quite a big one mind you), scheduled to phone me at 2PM, I was preparing mentally for 2PM, so I took my girlfriend to lunch at 1. Just to relax and calm myself before the phoned me.

It was 34 degrees (celcius - I think that's about 93 farenheit? somewhere close) outside and I was waiting for her to finish her smoke (she was in the smoking area).

They phoned me, and it caught me completely off-guard. My years of knowledge just seemed to flush down the toilet at that moment, and I utterly felt stupid talking to the guy over the phone. It was a first for me, and I hope that it never happens again - he basically stopped me, told me that I had better not apply before I know what I am talking about (as I was wasting his time), and then put down the phone on me..

Worst part was that my girlfriend came back right then and asked me if I am ready for the interview. I hung my head in shame because I was ashamed to tell her that I fucked it up, because you know, I kind of needed the job (the one I had at the stage was shitty).

I am sitting here fixing some asshole's fuck up (he went and fucked around with the certificates on the Sonic Wall - now DPI SSL doesn't work anymore and people are wondering why things aren't working as they used to).

I have been offered an opportunity to work in a place that is about 1000 miles from where I currently work. The pay is a bit better, and I get benefits (like health, pension, etc - where here I don't get shit).

The issue is that my family and what not are this side. They are begging me not to leave. They don't know that I have been considered for the job.

Not going to lie, the last time I moved away, I nearly died because I have a family to support, and I was porting all my funds back to them (yeah - the one who cheated).

I am anxious as fuck, and today I have an interview.

I don't know if going is the right thing to do. There is so much opportunity, and I might stuggle for about a year - but is the struggle worth it.

I cannot take it where I am now. They appointed a new guy, and he is monumentally fucking everything up. He also doesn't shut up. Even if you ignore him, or tell him that you are busy - he just goes on and on talking. Fuck my life.

Anyways, will see how things go - I don't know what is right - perhaps it will come to me.

I'll let you guys know what happens, not that anyone might directly care - which is fine.

Time to go fix CA, and then code until I die.

I don't think I have even ever used the app.

Another one bites the dust (i.e. You're fucking deleted mate)

This is a follow up on my previous rant https://devrant.io/rants/815062

I confronted her again.

I was told that I am useless and worth noting to this world, worth more dead than alive.

I was told that I will never get anywhere in life, and that the time I have spent watching Elon Musk interviews (amongst other ones, I do this for fun) is fucking useless, as I will never get anywhere ini life. Only low-life pieces of shit such as myself deserve nothing apparently.

I had to organise a place to stay with my family, but I couldn't for a week. I slept on the floor outside my workplace, and bathed at friends.

I have moved out, had to go get my own place. I have nothing, but I have my motivation back. I have my coding behind me, I have my motivation, I have my mind clear, and I have plans for the future.

I plan to fucking make a name for myself, and fuck everyone who has a fucking issue with it.

Will distribute the app sometime.

Fuck people who fuck you around.

I feel like a fucking abomination at the moment.

I have been working on an app that is almost like Wireshark. More so for practice than anything else.

I decided that today I would try it out on the network here at my house, so I started the packet sniffer and wanted to see what was going on. I was checking for unencypted text (like telnet and whatnot) and came across this odd address that I hadn't seen before.

I did something that I shouldn't have done, and I fucking clicked and did the equivalent of "follow TCP stream" on wireshark. I fucking went and looked what the text being sent over this fucking network was.

It was my girlfriend, using fuck knows what messenger, but it was unencrypted. I just found out that she is cheating on me. I don't want to go into what the texts exactly say, because it fucking hurts me deep down.

Why didn't she just use whatsapp or something, fuck man. I really don't need this in life at the moment. I am genuinely trying to get my shit in order, I have been coding my ass off at night for extra money to make it, I have been working overtime where I can - fuck I have even tried sucking up to management (I would never do this under normal circumstances) - and to top this off, the motherfucking tax man is giving me hell.

Fuck sakes.

If you want to cheat, fucking do it properly. Because I am in a state of pure sadness and hatred and the moment - and I don't know what the fuck to do.

Was coding and tired as hell, my light in the room blew this week and I haven't got around to replacing it - the darkness is not exactly that exciting.

Pressed a wrong button by accident, lo and behold my laptop has a backlit keyboard. I had no idea that it had this. Blew my fucking mind (I have never had the time to just sit and look at the function keys - I suppose that is one downside to never having to look at the keyboard when one types).

A new flow of inspiration came upon me, I opened up VSCode and put on some Pantera.

Code beware, I'm fucking hostile.

Today is SQL day.

Been some time since I had to go here, the queries are flooding back to my mind like water over a dam wall. How the heck I remembered these is what I pondered.

Oh well, back to SQL (at a client - yay).

Now you SQL me, now you don't.

When your co-worker writes shitty code that not even he can maintain, you know there's an issue. When said co-worker just goes and fucks up VC, you know there's a problem. When that slimy little motherfucker hits my rubber duck off the table...

Things like this are what makes my day a little more bearable. A little more bearable because I laugh myself to tears.

Uh... thanks Wireshark. I shall take that to heart.

I was sitting down at my desk today, pissed due to some more lack of coffee, and wondering about my future.

It came upon me that I absolutely despise what I am currently doing (job wise). There is a part of me that tells me that things are going to be alright, but that is just some nonsense that my mind makes up to rationalise how terrible it actually is here at this company.

I think that perhaps my abhor for my current position is a little more directed to the people and company that I work for, but I am really just fed up.

I have found quite a liking in terms of web-design. The clients and the work is a lot less stressful than what I am doing now - and I actually enjoy what I am doing. It is nice to see something come to fruition.

Perhaps that's the way to go? God decisions are fucking risky.

Was in a rush this morning and left my coffee on the counter.

I have a meeting in an hour and a half with a snotty motherfucker of an external client.

For his sake, I need to get my fix (because an interruption to my morning routine makes me a bit less tolerant of bullshit.)

You know, I am getting really fucking irate posting them rants about how shitty my job is.

I'm more than fucking competant, but this company is turning me into a blithering, raging, frothing maniac.

I am sitting doing my devOps at the moment. On top of that I am the network admin, the sys admin, the sec admin, the fucking fuck admin (you get the point) and now I am being told to go out and work in the field because "The technician is busy with calls, and doesn't have time". These calls are ALL FUCKING PRINTER CALLS. SET UP USERS TO PRINT AND FUCKING SCAN.

I am not being a shithead by saying no. I have spent the last year or so doing favours for these bastards, I don't get any compensation in any form for it, and it is just making my life hell. The reason I went into devOps is so that I don't have to fucking deal with shit like this. I spent years in the field, and I fucking hated it. I was good at what I did, but I fucking hated it.

Now I am back there. They earn more than i do, those printer techs, but I am doing their fucking work for them. I have even made them simple little fucking scripts so that 90% of their work is done in two clicks.

Fucksakes. Now my motherfucking right shift key doesn't want to operate properly. Been using this keyboard for about 6 years now, and now it decides to fuck out. Fuck.

As standing, I am fucking sick and fucking tired. I am drinking energy drinks and mass amounts of coffee just to stay functional (because I sit up until 12AM trying to get through all my work - everyday of the week). Reported to tech director, doesnt give a single fuck. "Stick around, things will get better".

Yeah, fuck you.

Seriously thinking about freelancing.

Don't know if it pays well though.

Been quite some time since I have last worked with PHP, but it is that time again.

New project, demanded that PHP being used.

*clicks knuckles

Seems my add-on is a little haywire, or Firefox is just at it again.

Had a laugh nonetheless.

Motherfucking WordPress coupled with motherfucking sales people.

If you promise the client something, please fucking relay it via the correct process (i.e the fucking ticketing system that took me a month to write for the company - it's seriously just a click away on your desktop.). "I told your boss" is not a fucking apt excuse.

My boss forgets, and well, doesn't give a fuck about procedure either.

Now you phone my boss and he phones me, on a fucking Sunday evening, telling me that the client was promised a website by tomorrow morning at 10AM. You tell me this at fucking 9PM.

Why didn't you tell me earlier? How the fuck am I supposed to shit out something I would be proud of in a few hours? Nevermind me fucking up my sleeping routine; how the fuck?

Conversation went like this:
"xyz was promised this site by sales person fuckTwit, I need this live by Monday morning. I have sent you a few images. Make it in WordPress, client says they want a 'tangy looking theme'.

Me: it's a bit unrealistic requesting this, is there no way we can extend the time so I have time to create this?
Also, what do you mean by 'tangy'?

Boss: don't know. Make it happen. No excuses.

What the fuck is a tangy theme? When I become a webDev at the company? More importantly, fucking WordPress?!

Now I'm sitting on this shit, tired as a manatee in mating season, and using goddamn WordPress.

I have to halt my irritation, because I get severely irritated when I'm tired, I have to restrain myself from telling the involved parties tomorrow to install the FuckYourself WordPress plugin, coupled with a resignation letter.

Same sales person got me in shit a while ago, because I refused to give him access to the network to download fucking cartoons. Sales director went and moaned that his bitch (the sales person) needs this for a presentation. Yeah fucking right.
Go Snorkelling in a sewer truck you egotistic, megalomaniacal, indecent, outrageous, horrible motherfucker of a person.

Time to develop a fucking website with, oh, a company profile pamphlet.

Times like this I keep telling myself, "my time will come, my time will come".

Delphi.

Why do I dislike it? Because it was fucking terrible (not sure about now, haven't touched it in years).

Ever been at a company that makes you feel worthless and useless? To add to that, have a director who has physically assaulted you? Company refuses to train, but demands that certain set of skills. Won't give a raise but has literally millions in funds for advertising. Yeah. Fuck that.

I am on the fucking verge of throwing my coffee cup at a coworker.

I am sitting in an office with someone who has to vocalise everything that he thinks.

It started this morning, I was trying to solder the board on my headphones, because there was a cable that had come loose, and every fucking time that I start, some shithead phones, and then a few minutes later, he comes in and talks shit. Burnt myself.

Now I am trying to maintain some code, and every fucking time I start typing and getting into my code, the need to talk has to fucking arise. I have literally thrown the last 45 minutes out of the window because I cannot fucking concentrate. Nothing helps. Throwing a coffee cup will probably just inspire more to talk about.

Phenomenal, another motherfucker just came into my office and decided that it is decent to use the phone to phone his buddies.

Fuck this shit.

Whenever I feel bad, I go and help random people with their code.

I also randomly offer to help teach people Java so that they can learn best practice and perhaps not make the same small mistakes.

Such is life. My method of coping with sadness.

Well, devRant has turned me from a bigot arse into quite the humble and decent person, and on top of that, introduced me to some new series (well more so the users than the platform, but you know what I mean).

Binge watched Silicon Valley (season one, I just started) and learnt about dick to floor ratio.

Prior to that binge watched Mr Robot. Cannot remember who suggested that, so I cannot attribute the appropriate gratitude to the appropriate person here.

Add to that that I no longer claim one language to be holy amongst others. Yeah. I was that dick before, we all have a bad side. I'm just admitting it.

I sat down and started utilising other languages, and even found quite a few that did what I wanted more efficiently. Plus I have gotten to meet some sharp people and broaden my own mind.

Fuck I hate my job, but I see a fucking brilliant future for myself thanks to coding and the open mind that I have attained. I attribute this to devRant (perhaps it was lying dormant, but you guys awoke it.).

Enough chitty chat, I'm off to sleep and then code my balls off.

Well, the impossible needs to become possible again.

"you will shit out a full website for this customer in two days! Fully responsive, 16 pages, and it better be good!"

Yeah. Ok. Fuck you. My attitude stinks, but your expectations and temperament kind of forge my attitude. Now tell me how in fucks name i am supposed to just stop administering over 3000 users and god only knows the ever growing amount of servers, stop all my server side development, so that I can make a site for a customer paying the company the equivalent of $100 for it (because sales people here are retarded) and get zero fucking commission or even a thank you for it.

Nah. Fuck this.

Tired of complaining, and I'm sure you guys are just as tired of it.

I have been sick for a week now. All I needed was one day of rest. But no, can't rest on the week days because I work late. Can't rest on weekends because work fucking calls me for retarded tasks that they are just too fucking lazy to do themselves.

Look gobknob, I understand you're not paying me overtime. Fuck you for that. But to deny me a day off because "we are too busy" and you can clearly see I'm fucking falling around due to illness is just a shit move.

"no doctors note, no time off". Yeah. You don't give me time to go to the doctor.

So you know what I did? I fucking went to the doctor now. Said I'm sick as a dog. Gave me a few days off too.

I should have asked him to prescribe my director a butternut sized suppository that cures all "I'm a shithead" ailments.

Time to try and turn my phone off for a few days (won't work. "oh no! We hired fuck twits who can't do their job, and now our skilled dev is sick" director "FUCKING PHONE HIM" this shit really happens.).

Excuse my grammar, my spelling, and possibly my punication. Time to sleep after 65 hours.

I'm not really one for news, but apparently (a while ago) there was some 12 year old who taught himself to code and made his own apps and whatnot. Girlfriend informed me of this.

Just got told that I'm a useless piece of shit because Im 23 and don't develop apps and I'm not rich like this kid. Fuck man. I develop mostly server side software, and I personally fucking wrote half the shit the company uses. No one really knows, so naturally in the silent developer. Don't much care about that. But fuck, being told I'm useless because a 12 year old has more money than me really made me take one straight to the balls. Now I'm sitting here, moping, downloading android studio, and just going to prove a person wrong. I can fucking code an app, it's not that hard.

Should have just said fuck off, but I don't have the strength and effort to face flying cups anymore.

Android sdk, here I come.

Qualification != proficiency

Worked at a company where this bloke (Jepediah mcShitFart we shall call him) had enough programming certs and qualifications to fill a page.

I was the one fixing his fuck ups, because he coded like his ass, debugged like his ass, talked like an ass, and used to shrug off responsibility like an ass. Hr did nothing because he 'was a long time employee'.

Plus, I have met hundreds of programmers who would put many to shame, and they don't have a single qualification.

See everything's source code just by looking at it. People, cars, everything.

Excuse the profuse amount of profanity below.

Fuck this fucking fucked up motherfucker of a fucking director. Money does not make you a fucking decent person, and you come in here and tell me that you pay my fucking measly salary so I must be fucking grateful.

Starts off with a boardroom meeting this morning. Wireless connection on my laptop takes two minutes to connect, I get told that I am wasting company time and that the salary of everyone in the meeting is quite a lot ("with me being the highest"- cuntface director) so stop wasting time. Fuck you man, it's a fucking wireless connection. I am building your motherfucking company applications and doing web design and for what, so I can earn fuckall and be told that I am fucking wasting time. I am presenting your fucking site you wanted, so give me a fucking minute extra to start up the fucking wireless connection.

The fucking mails are taking long to send, great, let's come down and fucking scream at the dev who regrettably said he would try and assist IT (by calling the provider). I literally just got told that I am the following. 1) Fucking stupid 2) He is going to close the dept down because I apparently fuck up (yet again cuntface, your fucking mailserver is NOT MY FUCKING PROBLEM) 3) He is going to contact an external company to come and check my work. 4) I am fucking useless. 5) I telling him lies (yeah fuckface, I worked as a sys admin, I know what a motherfucking DNS server is and what it does. you don't - so don't fucking tell me that I am lying when I tell you there is a DNS fucking issue, because you don't know what the fuck you are talking about - to top that off motherfucker, I FUCKING BUILT YOUR FUCKING SERVER AND YOUR FUCKING NETWORK. I FUCKING KNOW HOW IT WORKS AND WHAT THE FUCK I AM TALKING ABOUT).

On top of that, I got pushed out of the way of my own PC, my code got some fucked up gibberish in it (because he was trying to minimise my editor and he typed some in it, and now I have to fucking roll-back. He told me I am wasting company time and he will take my shit away from me if I download something again. It is an open network. I downloaded JAVA and fucking updated Sublime. Jesus man. What the fucking fuck.

"why is your gmail open?!?!" because I was testing your emails from an external network. "DON'T FEED ME BULLSHIT" (even though the top mail states "test"). It's the whole fucking "my money determines my dick size" mentality.

That being said, I got told that I need to work overtime, without pay, to resolve IT's issue, even if I have to on the weekend.

That being said,my new Dell that I had just bought (my own) got thrown on the floor and he fucked out of my office. Stupid motherfucker. I fucking earn nothing but cannot leave. I will find another job, and when I do - you can go and fuck yourself and your fucking degrading opinions. I am not fucking stupid, so fuck you.Fuck your company and fuck you. Cunt.