Genius troll 😂😂

Nowadays......¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Wont happen

Also this

Ok......

Me: *sends email 45 minutes before a meeting*.

Boss: *20 mins into meeting*, any updates about the issues found yesterday?

Me: Yep I sent an email with an update on everything.

Boss: ok great, *shares screen*, *opens email*.

Ok want to walk us through it?

Me: ...... walk through my email?

Boss: Yeah we have everyone here in the meeting.

Me: ...... yeah I included all of them on the email.

Boss: Right, but it would be good to go through it for everyone’s benefit.

Me: *Reads email word for word, from the screen share*

I will now refer to him from this day forth as “The Time Vampire”.

Me: Did Sherry let you know that I'm leaving today?

Coworker: what!? No!

Me: yeah... I'm leaving.

Coworker: huh, I'm not surprised...

Me: what is that supposed to mean!?

Co: shit man, this job sucks, I'm not surprised. I'll be leaving right behind you.

Me: oh.... Um... April Fools... 😬

Co: God damnit.

Me: don't worry, I won't tell the boss how you really feel.

Enter site

"U must disable adblock to use this site"

Ok adblock disabled

Refresh page

"CLICK HERE TO FUCK THIS FUCKIN HOT HENTAI BITCH IN THE PUSSY WITH HER BIG FUCKIN JUICY TITS AND BIG ASS AND EXPERIENCE THE BEST SEX VIRTUAL GAME OF YOUR LIFE IN THIS AD"

When a full-stack developer credits the whole team

Recently I've installed Tinder. Had my first match yesterday.

Me: "I see you're a product manager in a software company. Do you get along well with programmers? :)"

No reply. Unmatches. 😶

Yet another commercial seminar upset I won't give up a day of my time to fly to the UK to speak at the event for no payment or reimbursement for my travel.

But of course I should think about the exposure and networking opportunities! 😕

It's a merge conflict

key to getting in shape faster is joining a gym you can't exit

Source: https://skillprogramming.com/top-ra...

I am the internet...

PM: By when can you do this?
Me: Monday
PM: Which monday?
Me: Exactly

When optimizing becomes ur curse...

Boss - gives tasks to me. Timeline: 10 days.

Me - work hard and finish the solution in 3 days.

Boss- wtf is this. Do it properly.

Me - chills for 15 days. Submit the same earlier solution after that.

Boss - yes this looks nice now! Much better than your earlier work!

Me - dude seriously what kind of stuff do you smoke before coming to work?

Current State

😂😂😂

i started using reddit i few days ago

!r/ProgrammerHumor

😑

6 char

In future reading this sacred text may be part of our teaching curriculum.

Freefilesyncs installer made my day.

This is how one of our junior devs solved a merge conflict

OH FOR HEAVENS SAKE!!!

*I* take care of my food in the department fridge, *NOT* you!

And start to fucking realize:
IT IS CALLED: "Best Before End"
and ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT: "Guaranteed To Be Deadly From"

Next time you throw away my perfectly fine food, I'll dig into the reflog, throw a dice and throw away 3 random commits of yours claiming that THEY EXPIRED!
YOU ARSE!

Underlying pure C library and NodeJS wrapper

Couldn't resist sharing 😂😂

That's a good plan🤣