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AboutTech savvy, goofy, cheeky
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SkillsPHP, Node.js, MySQL, Docker, Kubernetes, AWS, React.js, Laravel
Joined devRant on 10/13/2019
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He wanted to hire me as CTO but insisted of defining architecture himself even though he admitted he has no tech background. He insisted that his CRM doesn’t even need backend because “we have database”. He was dysgraphc but completely ignored accessibility, including measures for dyslexic people. He called his product “startup” but denied that startups need to constantly validate ideas and denied the conception of a/b testing, offering no alternative.
He also wanted me to work for free.
Bruh you’re not a clown, you’re an entire circus.5 -
So I am a Junior Dev in this small company. We have different tasks for the current sprint so I don't care what my teammates are doing. Then came the integration of our works, where a Mid Dev was assigned to create a Carting/Basket service. As we are integrating, I noticed that we are passing data to his service as is. We are passing the price, item name, etc. on his API. I asked him why the fuck are we not passing the IDs of the items instead. He didn't understand what I'm saying and instead defended his work. I showed him how I was able to manipulate the total amount of items I added to cart. He wasted almost 6 days of developing. Ughh.3
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FUCK WORDPRESS TO DEATH!
Seriously, I have a degree in computer science and I can't for the fucking lfie of it understand the fucking architecture of fucking WORDPRESS!
How many fucking times when developing fucking shitty wordpress sites for clients you spent 66% of the time debugging some stupid fucki9ng shit related to the retarded monolithic fucking stupid architecture of this huge retarded abomination which should be killed in a fire with dragonfire.
How many fucking times while using trellis sage bedrock mother fucking super uber framework bubblegum you find yourself struggling with the fgucking broweser shit sync or some other fucking stupid bubblegum fix shit to make wordpress even remotely a decent experience to work with?
Even when buffed with a fucking shitton of boilerplate shit code from people who want developers to not fucking kill themselves while working on this fucking piece of shit framework the developing experience with wordshit makes me want to blow my fucking brains out with a desert eagle.
I seriously can't fucking stress how fucking shit this whole framework is and I seriously hope people stop using it for good. Wordpress was made by a bunch of fucking retarded monkeys who barely knew how to write afucking hello world.
This is the last fuckign time Im ever going to accept a wordpress project from my clients this fucking framework has driven me mad for fu cking years and i've finally had it with thsi fucking piece of shit framework and i fucking hope it gets buried 1000 km down and never dug up ever fuckign again.
Wordpress is the single most fucking horrid abomination that has ever been created in the fucking history of the tech industry.67 -
Happy Thanksgiving! Thank you for waiting for this new release of avatar items! We have new pets, new computers, new eye wear, some fun shirts and a special treat for our #1 ranter @linuxxx. The required ++ pts for these are a little higher than normal to reward the dedicated people who have helped support and build this community over the last few years. Thank you all!33
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Fullstack dev: Hey I need your help with one of this method in the service layer (We use Java).
Me: Sure. What’s up!
Fullstack dev: When you get a user ....blah blah blah...
Me (typing code):
if (user != null) { ... }
Fullstack dev: Wait! This won’t work. You need to write this:
if (null != user) { ... }
In Java, you write like this. In JS it’ll work, not in Java.
Me: (also fuck this guy)
He’s among the famous devs in the company - (A very very very famous European bank).
I checked his commits for the frontend (React Native)
switch (some_expr) {
case foo:
return stuff()
break // <— note this
case bar:
return moreStuff()
break // <— note this
// more cases here with break after return statements
}
Me: Hey if you’re returning from a case why are you using a break. It’s dead code.
Fullstack dev: It’ll fall through otherwise.
———————
You’re a fucking dunce! Please drink a litre of Carborane in a rusty HIV infested container! Cheers!
PS More to come!33 -
My productivity reduces by almost half after lunch and reduces to 10% the day I leave headphones at home. It is only after tea break in the afternoon that slowly I start getting back on track again3
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HR: Hi we got your application. We'd like to schedule a call. Can you fill this out to pick a time?
Me: Sure, sorry first I'd like to ask a question. You are based on the other side of the country and i'm not able to relocate. Are you open to remote workers? Your job spec didn't mention either way.
HR: GREAT question! At this moment no we are not. We need people here on site. If you'd like, we can have a call to discuss if you fill out the form.
Me: ..... take time out of my day so you can tell me "No" again? ..... i'm alright thanks13 -
Three of us work on an app. I made a mockup interface to develop the functionality, a second person made the designed interfaces and a third made the API. Now the design got included in the app.
I had a conversation with the third person.
He: Do you need a list of what works and what doesn't?
Me: If you have free time...
*2 seconds later*
He: Nothing except login. Have fun!1 -
How do you deal with massively poorly-performing and unknowledgeable teams?
For background, I've been in my current position for ~7 months now.
A new manager joined recently and he's just floored at the reality of the team.
I mean, a large portion of my interview (and his) was the existing manager explicitly warning about how much of a dumpster fire everything is.
But still, nothing prepares you for it.
We're talking things like:
- Sequential integer user ids that are passable as query string args to anonymous endpoints, thus enabling you to view the data read by that view *for any* user.
- God-like lookup tables that all manner of pieces of data are shoved into as a catch-all
- A continued focus on unnecessary stored procedures despite us being a Linq shop
- Complete lack of awareness of SOLID principles
- Actual FUD around the simplest of things like interfaces, inversion of control, dependency injection (and the list goes on).
I've been elevated into this sort of quasi-senior position (in all but title - and salary), and I find myself having to navigate a daily struggle of trying to not have an absolute shit fit every time I have to dive into the depths of some of the code.
Compounded onto that is the knowledge that most of the team are on comparable salaries (within a couple thousand) of mine, purely owing to length of service.
We're talking salaries for mid-senior level devs, for people that at market rates would command no more (if even close) than a junior rate.
The problem is that I'm aware of how bad things are, but then somehow I'm constantly surprised and confronted with ever more insane levels of shitfuckery, and... I'm getting tired.
It's been 7 months, I love the job, I'm working in the charity sector and I love the fact that the things I'm working on are directly improving people's lives, rather than lining some fintech fatcat's pockets.
I guess this was more a rant than a question, and also long time no see...
So my question is this:
- How do you deal with this?
- How do you go on without just dying inside every single day?8 -
You just realize the sheer amount of dependencies spring boot has, when maven tries to resolve them while sitting in a train with bad wifi1