This just makes me mad every time.

I have a friend who asks for help in coding and just reads and copies my whole code, doesn't even understand what's going on and just copies the whole damn thing (the variable names too). Also, says I don't know how to do it properly because I indent the code and he wants it all in a single line.

If there is any error in the code, just tells me that there is a problem and does nothing and keeps nagging me if I solved the problem every 2 minutes.

Once I solve the problem, just copies the stuff again and then brags to others about the code and takes all the credit.

After bragging, if someone asks him for help he just tried to match the code line by line and worry by word. And tells them their code is wrong if they are using a different method of solving the problem and asks them to do it like him.

Being an introvert, I don't go shoving my stuff in others faces and criticising their code.

But the professor knows I am good, so that works for me. :)

1. Doesnt want to pay for server
2. Doesnt want to pay for disk
3. Doesnt want to pay at all
3. Wants the app in 1 week

CS Professor: “What M word is the black hole to all productivity?”

Student: “Management”

CS Professor: “Was going to say meetings but that’s better”

Had a customer on the phone who couldn't figure something out. Wanted to give him instructions so I asked him whether he used mac or windows (getting used to not including Linux in that question). His reply: uhm this has a weird name... do you know elementary os?

Me: you're a Linux user?!
Him: yes, I'm done with windows and mac.

Then i gave him the instructions. Nice twist of the day!

Who needs Legacy Code to f*ck up your day when you can't understand the code you wrote 2 weeks ago

Last night I had a panic attack and woke up in cold sweats because in the dream I had I was constantly using the wrong variables in the wrong places...

Why is it that whenever somebody looks over my shoulder at my screen when I'm programming, I mentally degrade to a 6 year old and can barely type???

I guess my brain needs more processing power, or better recovery times?

Boss: hey mech eng, we need a setup modification

Mech: no prob, boss, we can have it prototyped in 3 weeks, industrialized in 2 months

Boss: oh, right then, go on

---

Boss: hey, Soft Eng, we need a functional modification

Soft Eng: no prob boss, we can develop it in 4 hours, tested and documented in 2 hours and integrated and shipped to the client by tomorrow morning

Boss: what??? One day?? You just need to edit a couple of lines of code! I want it ready in ten minutes top!

Ok! Ok! I got it, sheesh!!

This is how most comments in code are. Why are you telling me it's a coffee cup, I can fucking see it's a coffee cup, who owns it and why is it right here? Are you putting coffee in it or something else?

Some people should consider pair programming with a bear

Internship opportunities for Android Developers

Must have atleast 1 year experience in iOS development for Android.

true story

Nice move Microsoft...

If I have to give one advice to new developers, it would be - Don't assume that you are smarter than the other person and you know everything about why the other developer has implemented a system in a particular way. Don't assume. Ask your doubts. Clarify the pros and cons of a strategy. Learn from it.

Don't create a bias in your mind about a technology or a way in which things are done.

Having healthy discussions with a fellow developer is the one of the great ways to grow in this field.

Structure Padding

Today I learned that a user is a monkey with a baseball bat sitting in front of a pc.

hahaha the PHP part at the bottom got me so hard 😂😂

source: found somewhere on reddit

I've never felt so deprecated in my life....

The client (who is also a relative) decided to change the website after the testing phase. Gonna change 50% of the website tonight without getting any extra dime. FML

Don't work for relatives especially for whom your family asks for.

Found out a senior dev threw me under the bus for a mistake I made while coding and it affected my raise. Not only was I never initially informed of the mistake, I was never told what went wrong and why it needed fixing. We also don't implement code reviews or anything of the sort. Seems like a great avenue for improvement and growth, right? 😑

When your company doesn't offer free coffee and yet they still can't understand why all their deadlines run late.

Wow! After 8 years using Obj-C i really feel like I've mastered this...aaaaand...everything is in Swift now :/

exception handling in 2016

Well played Google, well played...

Apparently the firewall at work has blocked access our git repo since there are too many consecutive requests to it.

(after 1 month working on native android app).
Me: The android app is now ready.

Boss: okay great... Can we have the ios one ready for launch tomorrow.

Me: No it will take some time.
Boss: why you already have the Code can't you just make an ios app out of it... Like copy and paste

Me:😡😡🆘

That moment when you know you're writing shitty code, but you continue writing shitty code because the boss says he needs it yesterday... (._. )

When your program is well packaged and runs on even the 13 year old XP machine you keep around for testing these things, but somehow a customer has a Windows PC so shitty it won't run it.

A client tells me that the colors are all wrong on my screen, and offers the idea of calibrating it.

#i use f.lux