Well, my company hired a total amateur who can't do anything right on his own without copying code from me or the internet and I have to pretend he's helping in any capacity because otherwise I'm a "bad team player" and "should communicate more".

Helped me get over impostor syndrome, at least.

I failed LinkedIn's Git skill test T_T

A remake of a website named Death Roulette where Twitch viewers could bet against each other on how the streamer would die in different roguelike games like Spelunky or Crypt of The Necrodancer.

The original hadn't been updated in a long time and the API it used for Twitch authentication was deprecated and removed so I built my own version in about 2 months, just in time for streamer "Vargskelethor" Joel to play Spelunky 2 with his chat when the game came out.

Needed a bit of help from another chat member to get it running at scale but all in all that was my first full-stack project.

🎉 As of today, I can proudly count myself among the members of the "Killed Prod on A Friday Afternoon" club. 🎉

12 hours until epoch second 1666666666 👀

Note to past me: Do not take a job at a company requiring 24/7 on-call duty, you dumb fuck.

Senior colleagues insisting on ALWAYS returning HTTP status 200 and sticking any error codes in the contained JSON response instead of using 4×× or 5×× statuses.

Bad input? Failed connections? Missing authorization? Doesn't matter, you get an OK. Wanna know if the request actually succeeded? Fuck you, parse potential kilobytes of JSON to get to the error code!

Am I the asshole or is that defeating the purpose of a status code?!

This office has gone [object Object] days without type coercion errors

Literally can't afford to sleep less than 6 hours two nights in a row. If I do, like I did last night, my dumb tired sleepwalking ass will just turn off my two alarms and be late for work by like an hour.

How does something like this happen? I have no recollection of waking up even briefly to turn off my alarms but I know I wouldn't sleep in consciously on a work day, so whom can I even blame?

Wouldn't it be so funny if nobody replied to this weekly rant

Currently wondering why we use RGB when the "red" cones in the human eye are most sensitive to yellow light

That I did.

Why is it so hard to find a low-profile 105-key mechanical keyboard with MX Clear switches and no RGB fuss that's delivered within the EU? 🙃

I kind of ended up writing my own version of Redis, just an Express server broadcasting events you send it, when I made my first full-stack project.

Learn to read documentation and don't rely on 5 minute Youtube tutorials, stackoverflow or dev blogs for every little thing.

Does the weekly rant page have some kind of off-by-one error? It seems to always display the last week's posts on mondays.

Microsoft Teams lets you set a light gray text color that looks like faded text in the dark theme but is invisible in the light theme.
And it lets you set a dark color that looks faded on light and invisible on dark theme.

Thanks. Now I get to argue with my team about it.

When you misspell crypto.randomInt as .ransomInt and accidentally encrypt everything in your company's intranet.

wdym Family reaction story?

"When the truth eventually came out that I was a dev, my mom wouldn't stop crying and my dad still doesn't talk to me." ?

The football stadium game from the 1995 "Thinkin Things Collection 3" where you choreograph players and marching bands to paint the ground.

Personally, I prefer learning from examples, trial-and-error and official user manuals over teachers or online courses.

The human in me knows casting a datetime to a decimal(20, 12) is fairly future-proof.

The dev in me is worried someone working at the same company in 273669 years will get mad at him.

Would like to try realizing a game idea or two I've had a while ago.
I'd also like to put some more work into that webapp I built last year.
Then there's a couple old projects that never went anywhere but I could polish them up a bit.
Kinda want to learn some new languages and CG and digital art and finish 7 online courses I bought years ago.

There's just not enough time in the day.

I just LOVE how our service desk takes emails and reformats the fuck out of newlines so they look like

Hi

.

problem is fix.

.

kywbye

.

mr. dev

Some Java code I looked through to figure out how to accurately rework a mapping of value intervals to status colors:

• 16 levels of indentation
• Calls an instance method one line before a null-check
• Assigns that same value to a new variable and null-checks it again
• Insistently loops over existing HashMaps' entry sets to find a value by key
• Stringifies a Gson object, parses back the string and then null-checks the result.
• Mixes up the 'leq' and 'geq' comparison operators twice, which is why I went to check the implementation in the first place.

And this wasn't even legacy code. It's from last year.

I prefer the best ones. The worst ones usually aren't very good.

Started with flow chart programming in a robotics club after class in middle school.
Joined another club where I spent the first 3-4 weeks learning Python and JS basics on freecodecamp.
Programming classes on algorithms and frameworks in high school and college.
Beyond that, mostly reading documentation, stackoverflow and some udemy courses.

"No you can't use Java 11's `var` because other developers will [be boomers about it and unable to check types by hovering over variables for half a second]" - my team, basically

What does it really mean to be a dev anyway?

Here's one.