Sorta dev related.
I work at a service desk for an automotive supplier.
We've once hab out entire mobile phone system crash and for whatever reason, it won't let the phones connect, if there are more than 50 phones trying to connect at the same time. Kind of a problem if there are 400+ phones trying to connect.
My colleagues showed me what to do in order to get one phone to connect to our system.
It was basically: enter some invalid data on out webinterface, save, enter the correct data again and safe again.

It was too stupid for me. So i hacked an AutoIt script together in about 15 minutes, and let it run for the next half an hour. Showed it to my colleagues, they were excited and I went and got a coffee.

Got my first serious project about a year ago. Made it clear to the client that we are developing a Windows app. After around 80-100 hours of work client just goes "how about we make this a web app?" Got a "financial support" instead of the agreed payment. Got around 4 times less money than agreed upon. They never ended up using some parts of the software (I ran the server so I knew that they weren't using it)

I once had a nightmare explaining to the client that he cannot use a 30+ MB image as his home page background. Average internet speed in my country is around 1-2 MB/s. I even had to do the calculation for him because he couldn't figure out the time it took for the visitor to load the image.

the "open app" button in spotify app closes the app and opens the web in the browser

Typing from a screen mirroring app on Linux (guiscrcpy). Feels good.

FUCK YOU GITHUB AND YOUR MASTER SLAVE BLEEDING FUCKING HEART SPINELESS FUCKING HYPERSENSTIVE BULLSHIT TO BEGIN WITH !!! NOW FUCK YOU FOR REMOVING SHELL AUTHENTICATION AND GIVING ME A GODDAMN OTHER THING TO ANNOY ME !

soy eating developer: * change the name of his master branch to "main" *

Me: That's it, you ended racism!

We losing so many users nowadays. What happened my dudes

A word of advice to any new Arch user: don't use lxdm for your display manager. It's utter shit. The package hijacks the symlink of any other DM when you install it, and it refocuses the DM on a 5 second loop while it's running, making it a pain in the ass to use a VT. LightDM was broken temporarily so I had to install it, but frankly, I don't ever want to touch thiis piece of software again.

It's 2 in the morning, and my only type-C cable has just gave up

Why did the chicken get a penalty? For fowl play.

Set a key on my keyboard to open the task manager and as I’m streaming I set the controller on said button and boom my laptop crashed from the task manager

Sure mate

Sent my changes before everybody for code review, got git blocked because today was demo day, and ... And asshole guy merged his own PR without code review. That conflicted with my PR. I am going to start posting the shennanigans of asshole guy from now on, just to have a record of his stupidity.

The saddest and funniest side of our industry is (atleast in India): someone works hard and makes it to the best colleges, do great projects on AI, ML; get a good score on Leetcode, codechef; gets a job in FAANG-like companies...

Changes colors in CSS and texts in HTML.

And, why is there so much emphasis on Data Structures and Algorithms? I mean, a little bit is fine, but why get obsessed with it when you never write algorithms in production code?

Now, don't tell me that, we use libraries and we should know what we are doing, no, we don't use algorithms even in libraries.

Now, before you tell me that MySQL uses B-tree for maintaining indexes, you really don't need to solve tricky questions to be able to understand how a B-tree works.

It's just absurd.

I know how to little bit on how design scalable systems.
I know how to write good code that is both modular and extensible.
I know how to mentor interns and turn them into employees.
I know how to mentor junior engineers (freshers) and help them get started.
Heck I can even invert a binary tree.

But some FAANG company would reject me because I cannot solve a very tricky dynamic programming question.

CIMB Bank. their app is the worst!

Refer the picture below to see why.

Like Ads on digital world werent enough, now there will be billboards in space too. 🤦‍♂️

(SpaceX Launching Satellite to Display Billboard Ads in Space)

https://futurism.com/spacex-billboa...

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

So my company set up environment for docker and bablabla manually . WHAT? and a new employee took 2 weeks to configure everything.

So I decided to do some automation, a script to auto cnfigure, download , blablabla, all the new guy have to do is run the script (regardless of OS) and that save two weeks time. Everything configured just took 4 hours (the project is 3 GB) automatically.

omg

> Some unit test is not behaving well in my local environment
> Weird, I should print the response from the server, maybe the client isn't receiving what I think it's receiving
> see this

SAY SIKE RIGHT NOW

> imagine being that dumb and actually pay for crapple device

Visual thinker: someone who can take textual information and visualise to think critically.

A dumb retard in my team: "I want Floyd to feed me visual graphics so that I can think and understand because I am a visual thinker and I cannot understand text documents"

Manager: Absolutely everything must be done with libraries, vanilla JS solutions are absolutely prohibited!

Manager: Why is our app so slow to load? Is there a library we can install to speed the loading up?

Chase Bank Burning by Alex Schaefer

"This is a "plein air" painting which means I set up my easel right across the street of this Chase bank in my city and painted it like it had caught fire. The police questioned me on the spot. Three weeks later Homeland Security was knocking on the door to my home. The question they kept asking me was "Do you hate these banks?" I can honestly say yes."

Fucking hate sites with great SEO but shitty user experience like Quora. Top of Google but requires a login or else it's locked down like some university cheat site.

Fuck your low quality answers hidden behind a useless blurry paywall. You're a glorified Q&A. Go fuck yourself

HOLY SHIT GOOGLE NOBODY LIKES THIS RETARDED FUCKING ART STYLE JUST STOP

PhD applications in computer science are so fucking frustrating. I have responded to so many invasive questions so far. The only private information universities haven't asked yet, is my bra size. The only contact they haven't asked for yet, is my kindergarten teacher (And her bra size, coincidentally). The only document about a potential project I haven't given to them yet, is my freaking dissertation. None of these have anything to do with my research potential, btw. There's nothing asked of me about my research aspiration and how I actually undertake a research project.

And then suddenly it occured to me: people in Academic administration are not smart. I'm actually explaining my potential to a pretty dumb bunch (Excluding those in research, none of whom will bother with these stupid documents).

... The world seems to revolve around stupid people. Fuck.

Most people.
"Dance like no one is looking"

Me.
"Sudo like you have backups"

Let's clarify:
* Github is not Git
* Android is not Java
* Unit test is not TDD
* Java is not OOP
* Docker is not Devops
* Jenkins is not CI
* Agile is not institutionalised total chaos
* Developer is not Printer Support

In Europe, we use € instead of $ in jQuery.

I had a secondary Gmail account with a really nice short nickname (from the early invite/alpha days), forwarded to another of my mailboxes. It had a weak password, leaked as part of one of the many database leaks.

Eventually I noticed some dude in Brazil started using my Gmail, and he changed the password — but I still got a copy of everything he did through the forwarding rule. I caught him bragging to a friend on how he cracked hashes and stole and sold email accounts and user details in bulk.

He used my account as his main email account. Over the years I saw more and more personal details getting through. Eventually I received a mail with a plaintext password... which he also used for a PayPal account, coupled to a Mastercard.

I used a local website to send him a giant expensive bouquet of flowers with a box of chocolates, using his own PayPal and the default shipping address.

I included a card:

"Congratulations on acquiring my Gmail account, even if I'm 7 years late. Thanks for letting me be such an integral part of your life, for letting me know who you are, what you buy, how much you earn, who your family and friends are and where you live. I've surprised your mother with a cruise ticket as you mentioned on Facebook how sorry you were that you forgot her birthday and couldn't buy her a nice present. She seems like a lovely woman. I've also made a $1000 donation in your name to the EFF, to celebrate our distant friendship"