My girlfriend saw me coding in XCode.
GF: What are you doing?
Me: Ahmm. Coding.
GF: *saw the colors in every line of code
GF: That's easy. You just need to follow the color pattern. Green, Blue, Red and Yellow.
Me:
Macbook:
XCode:
Charger:

BTW. She's a Preschool Teacher. Hahahaha

A guy and a girl are in a Java seminar.

Afterward, the guy approaches the girl and asks, "Hey gurrl, can I get your number?"
Girl says "Sorry, I don't give out my number, it's private."
Guy says, "Oh I'm sorry, I thought we were in the same class!"

Friend: Man you're a programmer why aren't you a billionaire already like the others??

Me: It's not that easy believe me.

Friend: I have a great idea for an app something like facebook...can be that hard?

Me: :/

Friend: you could do that instead of your no pay opensource shit...

Me: FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID BULLLLLSHIT GO FUCKING DIE YOU PIECE OF SHIT !!!! YOU HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE ..STUPID SON OF A BITCH.

The girl in me loves Pinterest;
The programmer in me luvs devRant;

I thought "Java" and "Javascript" are the same language at the first time I learnt programming 😂😂😂

Sometimes, while coding, I get distracted by a tiny voice telling me: "Stop that! You're at work!"
But then I think: "Well, coding IS work."
To which the tiny voice replies: "Yes, but it's not YOUR work."

Damn you, tiny voice, I hate when you are right.
My current career(completely unrelated to programming or even CS) is probably my greatest distraction... and I hate that. =P

How freelancing negotiations work...

Found this, but not sure if it applies to us

Slow Internet connection and people who don't follow the Headphones Rules

behold! wk21 "it's like facebook but..." rants are coming.

Here is mine. #wk15 😎😎

Is... is this normal? 20k+ lines of CSS seems like overdoing it a little.

Stackexchange hot network questions...

Whenever you're debugging shit like "What weapons could squirrels use" pops up and I'm not even kidding when I say there's fucking serious answers... Some of them a few pages long

My wife.

Biggest distraction is other non-programming required courses to get your degree

TV series. If u start u will end up wasting hours

DevRant

I have Java 8 installed on both Windows10 and Ubuntu16

My (basic) app compiles fine in windows with javac, and when put into a jar works perfectly. But when cloned to my Ubuntu, javac fails to compile, and the jar fails to run.

Silicon Valley needs more episodes!
10 per season does not feed my hunger =(

Difference between chown and chmod 777 explained in one picture.

The moment when you try Android development for the first time, you get a bluescreen out of nowhere and after that there are problems with the jdk in your project... I do not get it. Please windows... I just wanted to try something new...😰

It does not feel motivating at all... :/

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." - Rich Cook