Finally graduated only to realize that my degree did not provide hard skills, only outdated practices and student loans.

When you mention in your resume that you are an active contributor to Linux source code.

So i saw this on fb today..
Haha

If it works the first time... its broken

*Uploading App to Play Store*

What's new: Enhanced Bugs

A bug that is not seen by the QA

..is not a bug.

Don’t get too attached to your code.

'Never deploy to production before weekend or holidays.'

2011: 3 billion devices run Java
2018: 3 billion devices run Java

I'm in love with PHP...

Today I have my final exam in Computer Science *.*

Wish me luck🙏

4am

"I need to brush my teeth before going to sleep 😵"
*goes to bathroom*
*washes hands*
*goes to bed*

1minute of heavy processing later

"FUCK"

Diamond:- Am the hardest thing in whole world.💎💎

JavaScript:- ohhhh please!😏😏

God bless those developers who give you a dark theme for their apps

My shower renders temperature as a boolean. 😩

"We're letting you go"

"Oh, why?"

"Well we gave you a laptop to work on for a reason, we expected you to take it home and have passion for your work"

"..."

Could've saved me a lot of time if they had told me from the start that they just wanted free labor

Me: I have admin rights
Windows: Looks legit
Me: can I delete this folder ?
Windows: Nope

In Europe, we use € instead of $ in jQuery.

Peer-to-peer connection.

🙂

*during my final job interview*

*holding the folder that contains my cv*
interviewer: Wait, before I open this I would like to guess which position you're applying to.
me: Hmm okay sir? Which position?
interviewer: I see you're applying as a back-end developer?
me: Yes sir, I am.
interviewer: Aha! That's because you have a long hair? Like it is a requirement for every devs to grow their hair?
me: *laughs* i think so?
interviewer: Well our devs here also has long hair. You'll meet 'em soon.
...

That sets the mood of my interviewing process that leads me the job offer. LOL.

1. Doesnt want to pay for server
2. Doesnt want to pay for disk
3. Doesnt want to pay at all
3. Wants the app in 1 week

!rant
Friendly reminder, please check the fire alarms in your house.

Buy a fire extinguisher if you don't have one.

This app is like the best subreddit I've ever subscribed! Joined yesterday and am already addicted

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Dev: Microsoft is shit

VS Code: (ಥ⌣ಥ)

Dev: Oh not you dear! You're not like the other guys

VS Code: (｡◕‿◕｡)

Motivational quote!!!!

12/10 UI design at McDonalds...
Left screen with the arrow says: "Look up your orders here"
on the right screen it displays the orders...

You know, exiting Skype is even harder than exiting Vim

There was a problem with a server we were staging on, and I was providing DevOps help remote.

As a joke I said, "haha if you run `sudo rm -rf / --no-preserve-root` everything will be fixed!"

They ran it. RIP server-kun 2016-2018 💨

No. More. Writing. Code. On. A. Fucking. Piece. Of. Paper.

 (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻