Details
Joined devRant on 7/17/2016
Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
Not laughing.
Not cursing.
Both for interviewing and being interviewed.
Some interviews could have been taken straight from a mexican telenovela.......
"Yeah, I worked for a year in the Walmart IT administration."
"Ok, what did you do?"
"Oh I had the high responsibility of taking care of swapping printer cartridges, programming the registers, stuff like that..."
"You apply for a senior database management role, you're aware of that?"
"Yeah. I took a bootcamp for 3 months in the evening after work. I'm up for the job and expect a payment of <lol, even having a stroke while writing a payment check that number will never happen>".
I made that up - but we had these cases... The story is just rewritten and mixed up for obvious reasons.
When I'm being interviewed, the same thing can happen by the way, too.
IMHO a interview is made not only for the company, but for me as an employee, too. I don't sugar coat it. I want to know what type of shit I'm getting into and how much I'm drowning in it.
Some "types" of interviewers react kinda funny when I start roasting them with questions...
For example, the authoritarian type usually reacts with disrespect. How dare u piss on my front lawn.... Kind of reaction. Which makes it hard not too laugh, because who wants to work for someone who throws a tamper tantrum during a interview? Even harder when the same guy promised you heaveb before (the flowery kind of bullshit, like everything's peaceful and fine and teams great and they have such a great leadership...)
Even worse is the patsy.
When you're sitting in an interview and the only answers you get are:
- Sorry, I don't know.
- I'm not allowed to ....
- Not in my area of expertise....
All just nice ways of saying: I will say nothing cause then I'd need to take some responsibility.
:)
The most Mexican telenovela stuff though in being interviewed is when I managed to divide a team of interviewers and it starts to become a "Judge Judy" or similar freaked out justice show...
A: "No, our team doesn't work that way".
B: "But you will in the short future, WE committed to it".
C: "Not that I'm aware of".
And me, an obvious sinner and person who enjoys entertainment and schadenfreude, just keeps adding kerosene to the fire.
"So, it seems like the team of A has its own rules which do not apply to B and C, do they also have greater funding?".
Oh it makes just fun to spur a good blood bath. -
"We need to reduce the scope of the project, guys... What if we don't make tests? They're taking some time do write, so..."
Yep. Let's compromise the quality and call it scope reduction. It will make wonders to our roadmap 👍6 -
You know what´s really retarded?
How HP decided to put the delete key next to the power button on their Elitebooks (and make the power button part of the top keyboard row)23 -
I feel like being a doctor is like being a contract dev. You're thrown into a bad situation, you know the stack but you don't know the project history, best practices aren't followed, and the only dev is also the primary stakeholder who learned everything he knows from w3schools.2
-
My dad got a new phone over the weekend and asked me to help him set it up (TL;DR his IPhone broke, he likely cussed out someone on the phone and now he's on android).
Setting up his bank app, I asked for his password (I somehow knew asking a 80+ year old man password questions wouldn't end well)
<pulls a card out of his wallet>
Dad: "Here you go."
Me: "This is your business card?"
Dad: "Yep. Password is at the bottom. That way I never forget it."
Me: "Jeez dad, you shouldn't have your bank's password on a business card. You don't give these out to people, do you?"
Dad: "Sometimes. Hell, they won't know what that is. Its just a bunch of nonsense."
Luckily the password didn't work. He had to reset it when his IPhone messed up and didn't remember what he changed the password to.6 -
Today I was 25 years old, asking for a raise or a opportunity to reach the next level of my career.
My department manager simply said:
"I'm sorry, but in terms of salary you have already reached the end of your career."
Bye then :)34 -
1. I join a company.
2. I get deeply involved in "how to run the company", and get nice compliments from both coworkers & management about my skills in conveying startup/scaleup advice & necessities to upper management.
3. With my ego inflated through all the sweet talk, I think "ah, what the hell, let's do this again", and I accept a Lead/CTO promotion. I have to join board meetings, write reports on quarterly plans and progress.
4. I get unhappy/stressed/burned-out because I really just want to be a developer, not a manager/executive.
5. Upper management understands, I give up my lead position, lock myself back into my coding cave.
6. I get annoyed because the requirements I receive become more and more disconnected from reality, half of the teams seem to have decided to stop using agile/scrum, the testing pipeline breaks all the time, I get an updated labor contract from HR by mail which smells like charred flesh, etc
7. The annoyances become too much to do ANY work. I yell at the other devs outside of the entrance of my cave. There is no answer, only a few painful moans and sighs.
8. I emerge from my cave. The city has turned into a desolate wasteland. The office is a burning ruin, the air sharp and heavy with black soot. Disemboweled corpses of developers litter the poisoned soil.
Product Managers dressed in stained ripped suits scream at each other while they try to reinforce concrete barricades with scotch tape and post-its. *THUMP* Something enormous is trying to break through. "Thank God, bittersweet, you're still alive! The stakeholders! They have mutated! We couldn't meet the promised deadlines! We've lost the whole mobile app department, and that kid there is the last of the backenders and he's only an intern! You're here to save us, right? RIGHT?".
In the corner, between the overflowing coffee machine and a withered cactus, a young boy has collapsed onto the floor. His face is covered in moldy coffee grounds, clasping on to his closed macbook for dear life, wide-open eyes staring into the void, mumbling: "didn't backup the database, and It's all gone" over and over.
A severely dented black Tesla with a dragging loose bumper breaks through the dried up vertical herb garden and the smoothiebar, and comes to a halt against the beanbags in a big cloud of styrofoam balls.
The CEO limps out, leaking blood all over the upholstery. He yells to the COO: "The datacenter is completely flooded with sewage! I saved the backup tapes though", holding a large nest of tangled black magnetic tape mixed with clumps of mud above his head.
9. I collect my outstanding salary and sell any rewarded options/shares for a low dumping price, take a 5 month holiday, and ask a recruiter about opportunities in a different city.14 -
I got a LinkedIn message from the HR from my previous company about a job opening as if I never existed and never met them before. I'm just a profile to them.
Stupidity level: HR11 -
I was working on a project lately where I needed to convert an array of bits (1s and 0s) to floating numbers.
It is quite straightforward how to convert an array of bits to the simple integer (i.e. [101] = 5). But what about the numbers like `3.1415` (𝝿) or `9.109 × 10⁻³¹` (the mass of the electron in kg)?
I've explored this question a bit and came up with a diagram that explains how the float numbers are actually stored.
There is also an interactive version of this diagram available here https://trekhleb.dev/blog/2021/....
Feel free to experiment with it and play around with setting the bits on and off and see how it influences the final result.13 -
!rant
Just got a message from a recruiter. It was something different. There was a link with a ZIP file and a bunch of files in it. Plus two MD5 hashes. You should now find the correct private key and the encrypted message to decrypt it with the key. This gave you the password to get further in the application process.
Not particularly difficult, but a refreshing change from the usual blah blah.1 -
A month ago I had some medical tests, the next morning, the clinic's send a email with my results. Oh surprise, unbelievable security flaws. They sent me a link without any kind of authentication, token, or security. I looked at my results, and by entering consecutive and random numbers I was able to download a lot of results and folders of other patients. I wrote an email to the clinic informing them of this situation and their response was "Thank you". Today I have accessed the link and the error is still present. I am going to notify higher health authorities.11
-
Everyone talking about Docker as the next big step in productivity. I still miss why Docker is so useful, to be honest, I see it as a "micro-vm " running your own software.
I have used this technology before but I really struggle to see where I could apply it usefully.
At this point, I'm thinking I'm just too naive about the issues it solves. So lemme go straight to the point:
1. How does Docker speed up your productivity?
2. How do you use it?17 -
Wholesome anti-rant.
There’s this Indian chick at work that I really, really do not get along with. Fortunately she’s on a different team so we have practically zero interactions. Her code was always decent, maybe upper junior level? but I went away fuming almost every time we talked.
However, I did a release security review today (I’m down from five/six per month to one) and read through quite a bit of her code. It was clean and easy to read with good separation, clear naming and intentions, nothing was confusing, etc. It was almost beautiful. Had I any emotions I might have shed a tear. I sent her a message and let her know :) I actually learned a better way of doing a couple of things from it.
She has grown so much as a dev.32 -
So, german long distance trees are called ICE/IC (Intercity/-Express).
The wifi there, if any, is called WIFIonICE.
My stupid brain immediately thought of a musical with dancing routers and switches in tights.7 -
Trying to spend non-work time doing things other than coding. Which means picking up new hobbies. 😅
Currently trying to teach myself how to draw cartoon cats.
Today, I worked on facial expressions.12 -
In freelance world,
Some Computer Science degree holder (from client company) explain how good are they in Software development.
But when as soon as my team and I (after got criticized by this guy for the fact that my team and I don't have a degree in computer science) review their code, the code is a bunch of spaghetti! No proper Architecture, no documentation, and everything in one class?
Damn...4 -
My uncle was a programmer. My whole extended family lived very close together, so I saw him almost every weekend. He would tell me tall tales about the war between corporations and open source. I started hating all things Microsoft and advocating for Linux. For my 12th birthday, he gave me a computer he had recently fixed. Of course, it had Ubuntu Linux.
That's when he started teaching me the basics: Bash, Lisp, and C. I know some of you are tired of the cliche "I started coding at 12 and built my first OS at 16," but of course that's not reality. I really just wrote simple math formulas like chicarronera^[1] for my homework, a super simple text-input videogame, and a button-filled GUI. That's nothing compared to what I do now, so I won't dare put that into my resume. But it did give me an advantage over my peers, and by the time I had to self-learn web development for my job, my uncle had already given me all of these tools.
[1] Spanish slang for the quadratic equation. Literally means "street vendor who sells chicharron". The formula is taught so fierce in school that even street vendors must know it.3 -
I'm so fucking done with all those "woke" YouTube programming tutorials like: "Why you should NEVER use else statements", "Why functions should ALWAYS return a value", "Why switch statements are actually EVIL" and stuff like this
I swear to fucking god26 -
"What the fuck is this file even for? Let's see who made it"
You, 2 years ago | 1 author (You)
"Oh, okay"7 -
Found this tweet by accident. At first I laughed, but then I realized that once I too didn't know what MySQL was. Crazy to think that I knew nothing just ten years ago.