So, I needed a package installed on one of our Unix servers. The package manager--which is obsolete garbage--was failing with a message which can only be described as a variant of "Go fuck yourself". A quick Google search didn't help.

3 espressos and an eternity later, I have descended into a manic state. My hair has turned grey and I have started lactating. As a last-ditch effort, I try a new search query on Google, and the first link takes me to a forum with a thread discussing a similar issue. The last post in the thread has a solution which works for me. After fixing the issue, everything in the world feels right and I decide to thank the generous poster, who is like an angel to me at this point.

Guess what? The poster is none other than me. 8 months back, I had created a user account on the forum just to post the solution to a similar issue I had on another server.

And that's why there are scientific programming languages:

"Hey, you are the Java guy, aren't you? My Java is broken!"

Me: *Takes a look at the code*

if ("4+4".equals("5+3")) {
System.out.println("Same result!");
} else {
System.out.println("Different result!");
}

Mmm. Hmm.

for(i = 0; i < n; i++);//<-- this one
{
//Do stuff
}

One day struggling why this for loop in C just iterates once, found out that ";" was leaving the for body empty, and the "Do Stuff" ended beign out of the for.

How to get fired (no pun intended)

Found this on Twitter 😂😂
Kudos to @Zixxel

I use "Hello Kitty" instead of "Hello World" in my very first program.

My friend Bob : "Hey meet my girlfriend Alice"
Me : "I always knew about you two"

If you hold up a UNIX shell to you ear, can you hear the C?

When languages play poker

...okayyy 🤔

So I was finally done with the project, every feature was implemented the way I wanted it be, every piece of code optimized and well written, I was completely satisfied with my code and didn't feel the urge to add a "last little feature/optimization"...
.
.
.
Then I woke up 😭😭😭

Fuck you, .DS_Store.

CableArt ...

Learning Java < Death.

Not a rant but I'm too excited not to post it. I proposed, she said yes!

Mathematician girl invites me to code some lines.
I arrive at her flat and she was alone so some part of me thought ehem. Anyway i took a look at the program first.
Me: so... it's a date?
Her: no im using cosmic radiation.
Me: huh?
Her: yeah accessing a value from a sensor gives a..

(Apparently she thought i was asking about the Random Function she was using, which usually uses the date)

Has anyone ever looked over the code that they wrote like two years ago and just felt embarrassed of how bad it is?

Just published first iOS app for client at apple store. 😎🙏🏼

I am a little bit fat (just a little bit :D) and there is no such an avatar in devRant to represent my look. That makes me feel I'm lying about myself 😐

!rant
My fiancé massaged my back last night with oil while I was programming #winning

Sorry if repost

Windows 10 found 3.99TB of temp files on my laptop with a 1TB hard drive.

Working on a project with 2 other students. One of them makes a C# "super class" with 50 fields, and manually creates getters and setters for each and every one. Then he proceeds to write a constructor that accepts 50 parameters, because why not.
I comment on the git commit, telling him that he can just write " get; set; " in C# and that he should model the problem in smaller, more manageable classes ( this class had 270 lines and did everything from displaying data to calculating stuff). Tried to explain to him that OOP works kind of differently from how he did it.
....
His answer: "Yeah, I don't really care. If it works once, it's okay for me".
This after the most beautiful code review I have ever done...

Fml

Successfully extracted Toyota.