I have a confession, I use animated gif's in chats to avoid giving answers when I couldn't be bothered, nobody ever complains and I don't feel guilty.

This is probably gona make me sound arrogant, but fuck it, you don’t know who I am, and I need to RANT!

I hate it when B.A.’s who have never studied UI or UX rail-road over my design decisions, and I just gota go along with it cos they in charge.
Then, when I make the interface the way they want it, all sorts of problems arise… Mother fucker, I saw this shit coming, and that’s why I designed it the way that I did.
Now I gota tell them how to solve the problems by doing what I originally said, and when they finally see the light, I gota waste more time re-doing the interface.
I once went through 5 fucking iterations of “Let’s try it this way”, Just to end up back with my original design spec cos these fuckers can’t even imagine what shit would look like, and how it will interact.

Now you would think after this happens a few times they would learn to trust my design skills, but noooo, Mr B.A. has to piss all over my ideas every time.
And every FUCKING time, we end up going back to what I originally proposed…
Learn your fucking lesson dumb ass!!!

*drops mic & goes straight to the bar*

Can anybody explain why a chat app needs almost as much memory as full blown IDE

I love finding snarky comments in the code

Why does the TSQL BETWEEN operator include the first and last value in the results when filtering on numbers, but only includes the first value and not the last for dates?

Do you use Pavlovian conditioning on your project manager and/or business analyst?

Would you hire a developer that believes the world is flat?

Can anybody explain why in C# when using string.Format("{0:C}", myNumber);
results in a string with special characters used for spacing instead of the normal space character.

This caused a issues in the PDF I was generating and I'm wondering why the special characters.

So the lady that owns the coffee shop at the office park I work in, is as obsessed with coffee as I am, and very proud of her cappuccino making skills.
As a result of our discussions about coffee, when ever I come into the shop, she takes over from the barista to make my cappuccino personal to ensure that it's perfect.
That is a wonderful gesture, but the barista make a much better cappuccino than she does.
I don't want to hurt her feelings, what do I do?

Back in my classic asp days, I used to average 12 hour work days with a few 16 hour days as the deadline drew near. No pills, just caffeine, junk food and cigarettes.

I'm sure the way I behaved in my 20's has cost me a decade of my life.

The worst was an 19 hour stretch, but I started getting confused and puking so I slept for 3 hours before finishing and then presenting.

I'm just glad those days are behind me.
I think I'm way more productive and healthy now at just 8 hours a day.

I wanted some ideas on how to word an error message better, so I googled "error message best practices".
80% of the results were about form validation and not actual code breaking errors >:(

On the up-side, I now know that I must not say "No, Bad User!"

I see stackoverflow are trying to deal with the shitty culture issue

Attention Irish developers.
What's the pay like for developers in Ireland compared to the cost of living?
I have been offered a job there with migration support, but I don't want to go be poor in another country when I have it pretty good in my homeland. Also, what is the industry like, is there a healthy work life balance?

So here is my underwhelming setup

Fuck SSRS!
Fuck rsweb:ReportViewer!
Fuck MS Report Builder!
Fuck the people on the internet that made this all seem like it was feasible and easy!

Why would you do this?
public Array multiContent;

I'm working on a legacy c# app, trying to understand what the developers were doing here

If you gona reference a web.config key in your code, wrap it in a try/catch and throw a useful error, for fuck sake!

TLDR: Why the fuck is a senior developer creating multiple instances of a core piece of logic all over the fucking application?!?!?!?

Context: I am also a senior dev, and have worked with this guy for years. He has even completed me on my clean code practices and architecture, so I really cant understand why he would copy and paste a public class into 3 other models on the project instead of just referencing the original. I’m just posting this hear as my version of screaming into a pillow in frustration, and to avoid badmouthing him to co-workers.

I scoured my memory, and realized that I have never had a fight with another developer in all my years. Yes, there have been debates, but they were logical. There are even a few unresolved debates, due to preference and ideology, but never anything with enough emotion to be called a fight.
That's pretty cool. We are smart people and can discuss important issues without resorting to petty bickering.

Anybody seen the The "Boring Software" manifesto? what do you think?

As software developers we are tired of the false claims made by evangelists of the latest and greatest technology. We will no longer confront them with their lack of understanding of computer science fundamentals, nor will we defend our lack of knowledge of their hyped and volatile technologies.

More at https://tqdev.com/2018-the-boring-s...

I vehemently despise the popular image of developers as borderline autistic savants living on junk food and working 24 hour days!

You see, I bought into that vision and became that person. When I first started working as a developer, I would work crazy long hours, eating junk food while neglecting my health and personal life. This behavior was encouraged by my boss and co-workers, and became expected, with the sales people boasting about it to the clients, like is somehow proved I was a better developer.
It's no big surprise that this kind of life comes at a cost and can not be sustained. I burnt out, my life fell to pieces and my body fucked out on me.
It's taken me years to repair the damage and I am still doing so.
I now work at a company that understands the importance of a healthy work/life balance, and I take full advantage of that.
Perhaps if I had a wise mentor when I first started, I could have worked smarter instead of harder and respected the needs of my mind and body.
I am that mentor now.

Developers are smart people, we should stop glamorising a stupid lifestyle.

Ugh... meetings

Reads clients rambling description of app they want developed... Head explodes!

TLDR: Ask irritating questions, you could end up saving the company money and time...

I’m working on a project where we are integrating 2 legacy web applications with each other.

Business Analyst/Project manager (BA) : Save all the contact details of the selected firm in application A into the database of application B, then expose that data later so that we can output it into the document when the user generates them.
Me: Seems a bit excessive, there’s even a fax number, nobody uses that anymore, are you sure we need all that?
BA: The old document has all that information.
Me: Please just check with client that witch fields are still needed in the document.
BA: Ok, fine, but it’s probably a waste of time…
BA: * Talks with client on phone for 10 minz *
BA: Ok client stays we only need the Lodgement Number on the document.
Me: We already store that and populate it in the document.
BA: I had budgeted 2 days labour for all that, you just saved us a lot of money!

Sometimes I use "KillMe" or "FML" in my debugging strings as a silent cry against whatever-the-fuck has upset me.

Management suddenly decide to push for an early go-live for a product being worked on by another dev team in the company. As a result we are pulled in to help and get extra tasks loaded onto our sprint.
My co-worker pulled an all nighter to get the extra work done.
I emailed the project manager to remove items from my sprint to make space for the new work.

Am I lazy, or smart?

When I build a large project, I open devRant, Imgur or youtube while I wait, but get so caught up that I don't realize when the build is done and spend way to long surfing when I should be working

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to all the pressure at work, and my boss sat me down one day and said "Don't take it so personally, it's only work".
He explained that you simply cannot make all the people happy all the time, you can only do your best, and that is good enough.

Your clients will want you to develop the app; cheaply, quickly, and reliably... Make them pick 2

So there was a 2b || !2b post on here the other day, I created my own version and posted to the developer group at work...

BTW: Sorry about the bright white, can't change the chat background on slack.