"Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork." - Sam Ewing

Hey, i want to make a game and i need some help, so I'm looking for a team.

What i need is:
2 programmers
3 graphics artists
2 level designers
1 music composer
2 dialog writers
1 web designer for page and forums
5 testers

What i will do, you ask? Well, I've got some really good ideas. I think the game should be like Final Fantasy, but bigger and better. I worked with RPG Maker for two months, but I'm best with ideas. I think my ideas would make some incred...

GO SHOVE YOUR IDEAS INTO YOUR ASS! The idea means nothing. I got an idea for the best game ever, right this morning while i was taking a SHIT!

Hobby teams need people who create content. And people who can do stuff will more likely work with someone who does stuff as well and has proven that he is able to get things done.

We all have our favourites

Source: https://twitter.com/AcademiaObscura...

Just saw a recruitment post for a female speaker to join a female panel at a "women in tech" event. And it's by an organisation called "codelikeagirl". 😒

As a female developer, it gives me the upmost cringe to hear about any #women or #girlpower events. Do you really need to validate your ability and support because of your gender? Men don't go to #menInTech events, so why do you need to go #womenInTech events?

On the surface it seems all friendly and gender equality fluff. But if you segregate yourselves into an all exclusive group, isn't that the opposite of what your trying to "achieve"?

Power of sudo

Every single time I visit my family during holidays they expect one to fix their computer/smartphone/printer/whateverFuckingShittyIOT-Device... Just printed them postcards this time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also: Hello devRant! Just been reading here for a week and every single day was full of gold - Thanks :)

Small design flaw maybe...

Who made this? Im sure nobody on #DevRant :)

AUTOEXEC.BAT

HTML - hot tomato monkey language
CSS - crazy stupid script
PHP - per hour pay
JS - just scream
JAVA - just a valid acronym
C# - see sharply
Objective C - OOP cash
C - cash
C++ - cash++

Gillette Excel

In a form's text area, pressing return should always start a new line. It should never submit the form.

Well, at least they're being honest about it

Boss: I need you to start on this new project, how long will it take?

Me: well, hard to say with no specs whatsoever...

Boss: just your best guess

Me: 4 to 6 month I guess?

Boss: so 3 months it is. When can you start?

Me: no specs, sir...and I said 4 to 6

Boss: the specs are almost ready, I know you can simplify it

Me: ...

Boss: just start with the basic infrastructure already

(4 months later)

Boss: here you are the specs, they might change a little in behaviour and design, but all the main stuff is here

(Hands me a A3 with a total of 21 pictures in InDesign)

Me: o....Kay. what happens when I click here?

Boss: oh, we should still talk about the app workflow, I'll get you updated

(2 weeks and 16 total rewrites of the "specs" later)

Boss: you told me it was a 2 months job, why aren't you finished yet? We must deploy in 3 weeks!

Me: ...

When you are a Dev but you don't want to be single

Girl: what's your profession?
Me: I am a writer
Girl: Cool! What do you write?
Me: I write code😎

Favourite Programming Quote - Whats yours?

"A computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things." - Bill Bryson

CSS - keep guessing the values until it looks fine.

This is how I write my header signatures ;)

Software which is not open source...

Happy Easter fellow ranters

Spot on

Pro tip: if you encrypt your message with ROT13 twice, the security is also doubled

Interviewer: Alright, so tell me what you like about software, but you don't have to limit it to software you can talk about hardware too. But yes what do you like about software?

Me:

What client requested vs What we could afford

cracks me up everytime !

Well, here's my work setup.

Please don't judge 🤓

That feature though!!

!rant
Because dual monitor setups are too mainstream... here's my dual mouse setup.

There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who weren't expecting a base-3 joke!