I got this from a page in fisbuk

...this

Jep, that's one way to handle this...

This kind of top answers bring back into question all my certainties about computer science

Right😂😅

This was me when i tried react.

$ man unzip
Definitely the weirdest command I've used in a while

installed Mint with xp skin on an old family [win] computer. they didn't even notice it

Whenever I think about my future.

The time a client compared me to an abortion for charging him a £10 monthly hosting fee...

Nope.. Not doing that.

Sleeplessness !

When good developers are afraid of refactoring and adding new classes is something to be feared, you need to rethink your architecture.

In fact, if there's ever that "dark corner" of code that no-one likes to work with, you've got to fix it.

It's like continuous deployment. We do it often because it's hard and having to deploy regularly forces us to make it easier.

I went to an hotel and they had a rubber duck in the shower

Reading the Android source code and finding this gem here 😂

Phone conversation between me and a client:

CLIENT: "I see it weird..."
ME: "Which browser are you using?"
CLIENT: "The one you tech guys don't like"
ME: "Internet Explorer, isn't it?"
CLIENT: "Yeah, I'll switch to Firefox then."

Best: got an offer from Google.

Worst: family and friends trying to convince me to turn down the offer and take a local job.

(I'm from a small town where family is everything to everyone and leaving is blasphemous.)

I finally bought myself a Sublime Text 3 license for Christmas.

Today on how to make money fast:

Wife: I got a Roomba for Christmas!

Dev Husband: oh.

Dev Husband *hours later* : Did you know it has an MQTT interface accessible over IP? I already wrote a NodeJS app to track if we need to empty the bin.

What if Doctors are treated as developers?

Just a tip I read today :
Don't deploy anything to production this week. So u don't endup debugging during the holiday and abandoning ur friends and family. ..
Happy holidays 🎉

The best example of useless ui. "press ok"

It's only been a few years, might need a little refactoring.... The things you find when cleaning up old directory structures on forgotten hard drives...

Tries to be an ass to someone annoying, somehow ends up being nice to them. *facepalm*

--next day--

Tries to be nice to someone, ends up being an ass to them. *sigh*

me, when someone yells at me for not able to resolve an "electronic" issue because I'm pursuing a computer science degree

devRant

I don't know what it is but, isnit just me or does anyone else just find writing JavaScript really fun?

No... Just me? Ok cool

Step 1. Get a large touchscreen monitor. Connect it.

Step 2. Modify the driver so touches don't actually cause clicks or anything.

Step 3. Let it play a sudden, loud BEEP instead. Increase the volume for each subsequent touch.

Step 4. Lean back and watch people learn that you don't like your screen being touched.

Fuck you, devs who quote Knuth:

"Premature optimization is the root of all evil"

I agree with the spirit of the quote. I agree that long-winded arguments comparing microsecond differences in performance between looping or matching constructs in a language syntax is almost always nonsense. Slightly slower code can even be preferable if it's significantly clearer, safer and easier to maintain.

But, two fucking points need to be made to you lazy quickfix hipsters trying to sell your undercooked spaghetti code as "al dente", just fucking admit that you had no clue what you were doing.

So here we go:

1. If you write neat correct code in one go, you don't need to spend time to optimize it. Takes time to learn the right patterns, but will save you time during the rest of your career.

2. If you quote Knuth, at least provide the context: "We should forget about small efficiencies, say about 97% of the time [...] Yet we should not pass up our opportunities in that critical 3%"

YES THAT CRITICAL 3% IS WHERE YOU MESSED UP.

I'll forgive you for disgorging your codevomit into this silly PR.

BUT YOU'RE QUOTING KNUTH IN YOUR DEFENSE?

Premature optimization is the root of all evil... 6300 SQL queries to show a little aggregate graph on the dashboard... HE WOULD FUCKING SLAP YOUR KEYBOARD IN HALF IN YOUR FACE.