I will have a bear.🐻

Gaming anytime!

The reason I become intrested in computers was gaming.
Given I started out as a game dev, playing games helps me think more about it and imporve my skills.

Also sometimes it reduces my productivity :P

Git Push...

"As a team, we have the shared responsibility to ___".

(replace with ALL of the following: resolve bugs, do junior's code reviews, clean up dead code, keep the kitchen clean, improve test coverage, write documentation, order coffee beans, etc)

NO. JUST FUCKING STOP RIGHT THERE. Shared responsibilities do not exist. A single person is responsible, and can optionally delegate tasks.

EITHER I DO IT AND I'LL BE FUCKING AWESOME AT IT, OR SOMEONE ELSE DOES — BUT I'LL SLAP SLACKERS IN THE GENITALS WITH MY KEYBOARD.

Fucking startup hipsters with their community driven attitude, this way no shit gets done, ever.

Oh shit. I found something better. Had to delete previous rant.

Google Assistant is actually being cheeky!

At work I am "the" programmer and is the first time in which I actually enjoy showing different solutions to problems without having a fear of implementing large things without having any form of recognition.

Seeing someone get happy because of something you created is a great feeling and even tho most of us are misantrophic af we can still appreciate bringing happiness through code.

To me, software engineering is the closest thing to magic and I really believe that.

Two days ago I showed my manager a little utility to build small portions of the site we are building and make changes to it in real time without browser refreshes for whatever change she would like to do. She was super happy and excited and it made me feel real happy.

Such great feeling man. Nothing but good vibes brother!!

I have to rant a bit about the toxic reactions to a constructive Q&A website.

People keep complaining that they get downvotes and corrections, or stuff like that.

Are you fucking kidding me?

So you expect people to spend their own time for absolutely free, to help you, while you don't even want to invest in describing the issue you're having properly? And then complain that people are having issues in understanding your questions?

Let's look at this scientifically. Let's gather up some questions that have been received badly on SO in the last few hours. From the top (simply put https://stackoverflow.com/questions... in front of the id):

47619033 - person wants a discussion about an algorithm while not providing any information about what worked and what failed. "Please write a program for me". Breaking at least 2 rules.

47619027 - "check out my videos" spam

47619030 - "Here's the manual that has my answer but I can't find my answer in it".

47619004 - "how do I keep variables in memory"

47618997 - debug this exception, I'll give you no info on what I tried and failed. Screw this, you guys figure this out, I'm going out for beer.

47618993 - expects everyone to guess what the input is, what the expected output is, and whether he has read what HashMap is in the manual. But sure, this question is so far the best out of all the bad ones.

47618985 - please write code according to my specifications

Should I go on? There wasn't a single clear question about problems in code in this entire small set. Be free to continue searching, let me know if you find something that:
1. You understand what's being asked
2. Answer is clear and non-ambiguous (ex. NOT "which language is the coolest?")
3. Not asking someone to write a program for them.
4. Answer is not found in the most basic form of manuals (ex. php.net)
5. Is about programming.

The point is:
If you get downvoted on Stackoverflow - then you wrote a shitty question. Instead of coming over here and venting uselessly, simply address the concerns and at least TRY to write a clear question if you expect any answers.

Guys, would you rather do with good team and be the least experienced or in a small company and be the best programmer there?

When my mom asks about my problems :p

What's your programming background music?

I listen to classical music
These days mostly Chinese traditional

(No I'm not Chinese)

When people talk about traveling to the past, they worry about changing the present by doing small things, but pretty much no one in the present thinks that they can change the future by doing something small.

When sites use tables to display comments >.<

I hate access. I wish I could use literally any other program. But they're not authorized.

I'm the only one working on this, and everything is closed. How the fuck is the object in use somewhere else? And where the fuck did my primary key go???

There is someone behind me who literally types so hard that I think they keyboard will break...

Pressing every key as hard as you can won't help ffs....

Suck my hairy asshole, devs who disable paste for web forms. Or more likely, management softs who read in a trade magazine that paste is bad.

Introducing new Notif filters! Now on mobile, all your notifications are broken up into category tabs and you can clear each category separately. No more digging for mentions!

Also we just released a new image preview for when a rant is shared on FB, Twitter, etc. which includes the ranter's avatar image. You can see it by sharing a rant on social media, or check out an example here: devrant.com/rants/1036286/image.png (if you change the rant ID, you can see others)

They apparently think that I should answer every telegram/email/WhatsApp message immediately.
"You're looking at the screen the whole time anyways!"
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(╯°□°） ╯︵ ┻━┻)