I've always elected to program a lot of my tasks instead of manually inputting them. Using a computer to solve repetitive tasks is the name of the game.

Stackoverflow.

Google assistant just destroyed Siri.

var day = (new Date()).getDate()

Student: "We're programmers. We can't get a date" 🤣

Angry Developer's advice to fresher

StackOverflow code.

Try not to use floating point numbers in places where precision is important. Like for instance, money. Always store the base value where it makes the most sense

guthib.com

Found this on fb.

When I joined my team in august as a junior/trainee, we were 6 developers.

Now we are 4 left in the team.

By the end of june, we are 1.. I mean its me, myself and I.

Wtf did I do!? My code isnt that spaghetti. I think...

But its np, just me with a 20 years old database, 7 legacy systems and a new one planned.

Atleast my boss believes in me keeping this shit floating.

A hacker deleted the despacito video from youtube.

Those are not the hackers we deserve, but the hackers we need.

In case of fire...

GDPR done right. 😂😂

!rant

Best advice ever: "Why are you using Java for this? use Python"

And that kids, is how I fell in love.

“Don’t learn multiple languages at the same time”

Ignored that. Suddently I understood why he said that. Mixed both languages. In holiday rechecked it and it was ok.

Sometimes mistakes can lead to good things. After relearning I understood it much better.

“Don’t learn things by head” was another one. Because that’s useless. If you want to learn a language, try to understand it.
I fully agree with that. I started that way too learning what x did what y did, ... But after a few I found out this was inutile. Since then, I only have problems with Git

Another one. At release of Swift, my code was written in Obj-C. But I would like to adopt Swift. This was in my first year of iOS development, if I can even call it development. I used these things called “Converters”. But 3/4 was wrong and caused bugs. But the Issues in swift could handle that for me. After some time one told me “Stop doing that. Try to write it yourself.”

One of the last ones: “Try to contribute to open source software, instead of creating your own version of it. You won’t reinvent the wheel right? This could also be usefull for other users.”

Next: “If something doesn’t work the first time, don’t give up. Create Backups” As I did that multiple times and simply deleted the source files. By once I had a problem no iOS project worked. Didn’t found why. I was about to delete my Mac. Because of Apple’s WWDR certificate. Since then I started Git. Git is a new way of living.

Reaching the end: “We are developers. Not designers. We can’t do both. If a client asks for another design because they don’t like the current one tell them to hire one” - Remebers me one of my previous rants about the PDF “design”

Last one: “Clients suck. They will always complain. They need a new function. They don’t need that... And after that they wont bill ya for that. Because they think it’s no work.”

Sorry, forgot this one: “Always add backdoors. Many times clients wont pay and resell it or reuse it. With backdoors you can prohibit that.”

I think these are all things I loved they said to me. Probably forgot some.

"The first 90% of a development is done in the first 10% of your estimated time schedule and the last 10% is done in the remaining time"

“Yeah, the database password has to be ‘password’ or the code won’t work”
—My PM

Note: I don’t actually believe this to be good advice.

That I should try out some of the functional concepts

"Engineers don't memorize documentation. They know how to use it."

Programming felt insurmountable to me before I started with it. This phrase blew my mind and changed my approach entirely.

Always be humble and always keep learning. No matter how good you get, there is always some better.

"WiFi is better than Ethernet because the air is bigger so it can hold more internet."

Yes, and horse-drawn carriages are better than cars because they have bigger wheels.

Came across this on 9gag. I'm hoping it's not a repost here.

Friend asked my if I could create his webshop.
I agreed.
Some time after that he told me “It’s ok. Will install WordPress. If it doesn’t work I will come back.”

1) I don’t like to be your second choice
2) FUCK WP

Just now he came back: “Hi WP works, but I have a problem removing x”
Me ...
F: “Fix it”
Me “Sorry don’t work on command”
F: “Just do it we are friends”
...

To be continued

Got this in a fortune cookie the other day right after I released a new app.

Ubuntu 18.04 is sooo beautiful 😊 I can't connect to WiFi or ping 8.8.8.8 but it's soooo beautiful 😊

*During last week's meeting*
Me: That update should be out in 2 weeks.
Client: Okay
*2 days later*
Client: So where's that update?

I've never found a perfect video until now.

Myth debunked. This explains the history of Apple computers.

In our company, we use JS stack.

Interviewing a Data Scientist