I'm mad. Really really mad. I've worked so hard and this guy just comes in makes me feel inadequate. I come in every day and there he is sitting in his corner watching me as I work. For him it's so God damn easy! It takes me hours to do what he accomplishes in mere minutes! Oh yeah and he's such a fat ass too. He doesn't even have to do much to get his food. It just comes to him. I don't know how he fucking does it. He's got no fucking phone! What the hell!? I actually have to get up and go places to get my food. He's so fucking entitled, the little shit. He thinks he's a suave motherfucker. Well I fucking hate him. I might actually get around to killing him and then wiping the floor with him. But today's not that day. He's just a little to high for me to handle, honestly.

I should really just keep my head down and continue working and not let him bother me. But I can always feel it, that stare behind my head. I guess...

spiders are just better web developers than i am

!rant

Does anyone of you know LOLCODE?
If not let me present you a simple program that displays the numbers 1-11 and terminates:

HAI 1.2
CAN HAS STDIO?
I HAS A VAR
IM IN YR LOOP
UP VAR!!1
VISIBLE VAR
IZ VAR BIGGER THAN 10? KTHX
IM OUTTA YR LOOP
KTHXBYE

You gotta love the okay thanks bye as termination :D
Check it out on GitHub

The most useful utility I've ever seen 😮

Story of my life. Staying up all night to work on something that gets postponed or cancel
Source: http://commitstrip.com/en/2013/...

Coincidence? I don't think so!

The company motto

Le me having a chit chat with a student after sharing about programming in my former high school..

Student: "I learnt Java the other day, and I don't really like it"

Me: "Why?"

Student: "Because we can import existing packages on the community to do almost anything"

Me: "And? How is that bad for you?"

Student: "It's not very challenging, isn't it? I want to build everything in my program with my own code!"

Me: [silence]

Me: "Listen here, you little shit..."

When 3/4 of my team gave up and left halfway through. I still don't understand how we ended up with a working prototype in the end.

Programmer boyfriend: you should come back to programming

Me: why?

PBF: then we can work together

Me:

Me right now.

When you are fixing a friend PC and your girlfriend send a message : " I am home alone "

When a coworker thinks that you're friends because they watched The IT Crowd with 1337 subtitles on

Github down... nuff said

Learning to touch type: feel like a god when you get a password right first time

For fuck's sake Adobe, just do the damn Photoshop version for linux.

Needs to be 2am.. else nothing gets done!

Our designer (and frontender) just saved my ass big time. Had to do a tiny project involving design and frontend so I gave it a try and it looked like crap, deadline in a week. The designer made the most beautiful thing in like two days.

Kudos to all designers for doing what they're good at and ensuring that we, backenders (and cyber security people for that matter), can do our thing without having to worry about knowing how to design stuff and create interfaces because we might hate doing that and sometimes just really suck at it.

Kudos designer guys/girls!

Stick my headphones in and ignore the world around me

Programmer boyfriend: *explaining his work and code and how things work*

PBF: does that make sense?

Me: of course

Narrator: it did not make sense

When you build a website with full CMS and you end up taking care of the content because your client "just can't be bothered"...

devRant is better than 9GAG 😂

Fuck this shit, fuck it, take it down, smash it with a rock and fuck it. Fucking 18th century system where we are graded for a 2 hour work after 6 months of learning. Fuck the idiots who think reading from a piece of paper will teach us something. Fuck the sheep who follow without looking aside. Fuck the asshole who initiated it all, and fuck this shit. Thank you.

All night working on java and when i got my eyes off of the screen I couldn't C#.

CAN SOMEBODY STOP THE TIME FOR A WHILE!!!

I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DO AND TOO LITTLE TIME!!!

FML!

PS. WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING IN DEVRANT?

I feel like people don't understand what I mean when I say "I'm a console gamer"

Recipe for a Great Programmer:

Ingredients:
-Books for a computer science curriculum from a top university
-Computer
-Headphones
-Internet
-Stress ball
-Pillow
-Lighter fluid
-Food

Directions:

1. Cover computer science books with lighter fluid
2. Light books on fire
3. Use flames to cook an energy-rich meal for the thousands of hours ahead
4. Pick an IDE
5. Choose a project beyond current capabilities. Good ways to push boundaries:
- Unfamiliar domain (e.g. large scale data processing, UI programming, high performance computing, games)
- Exotic programming language
- Larger in scope than any project before
6. Shut up about your IDE
7. Attempt to build
8. Stop procrastinating on Hacker News
9. Re-attempt to build
10. Squeeze stress ball and scream into pillow as necessary to keep sanity
When stuck:
- Paste stack traces into Google
- Find appropriate mailing list to get guidance
- Realize that real learning happens when you are stuck, uncomfortable, and/or frustrated
- Seek out books, classes, or other resources AFTER you have a good understanding of your deficiencies
11. Repeat #4 to #10 for at least 10 years
12. Results guaranteed! (to the same extent static types guarantee bug-free programs)

source: nathanmarz.com

What a beauty to start the day with

##Rant

Me to coworkers tomorrow: best wishes.
Me to boss tomorrow: Go f*ck yourself

I'll take home.