- Her : How’s your life going?

- Me :

...solution found!

I identify with this far too much.

*i am a teenager*

*i don't have credit card*

*can't buy anything*

*sees unixstickers is $1*

*pulls out a dollar from physical wallet*

*throws in the air*

*cries*

*Mom shows me laptop ad of 3000 bucks with the most overkill specs ever*

Mom: "Son, will this laptop run Google?"

Me: "Do you want to surf Google or actually run Google's server?"

Mom: *looks confused*

"I also want to use Fesabook on it"

Me: *brings her a 5 year old laptop with a new ssd in it*

*has an old i3, 8gb ram and no gpu*

Mom: "This laptop is super fast! Thanks son!"

*One hour later*

*Mom calls*

"Son, I think the laptop broke"

Me: "What? What happened?"

Mom: "I pressed a button and now all the keys are lighting red" (backlit keyboard)

Me: "You can choose the color of your keyboard mom"

Mom: "Ooh! How do I make it pink?"

Me: "You can only choose between red and blue..."

Mom: "What a ripoff"

*Hangs up the phone*

This location 😂

Everything is fine 😌

State of my life:

Opened a fortune cookie but no fortune was inside.

Machine Learning messed up!

*client calls in*

Me: good morning, how can I help you?
Client: my ip is blocked, could you unblock it for me?
Me: certainly! What's your ip address? Then I'll have a look.
Client: I'm not giving you my ip?! That's too privacy sensitive.
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: sir, I'm very keen on my privacy myself but without that information I can't do much for you 😬
Client: ah so you're refusing to help me?
Me: not like that, it's just very hard to lift an ip block for me when I don't know the ip address.
Client: you just don't want to help, fine.

*click*

😶

"I should really make better offsite backups"

"Right, this service doesn't do client side encryption"

"Oh this one doesn't have a Linux client"

"OK this one only sets up a single directory you can dump shit into"

"Wtf this one charges more than a high class escort girl"

Whatever... I'm sure my house won't burn down.

Those LAN port splitter are getting out hand

No, thank you, you nice little app. If you wanted to call someone to find out the weather, I think I can do it myself.

"enter Phone number"
"numbers not allowed"

Finally I have something to rant about.

It's 4 A.M and I just remembered what I did wrong, this happens every freaking time 😐

What the hell brain !
I need some sleep !

clients union

!rant && !dev

So... yesterday was the red Moon and Mars was visible and so much more. I took a lot of pictures with my telescope. I also took a 4k Video for 5 Minutes (my storage is now full)

Picture from yesterday: https://devrant.com/rants/1591093/...

Image 1/2

So if anyone have post it before please tell me and I will erase

The office toilet chronicles - episode 3

Someone left shit on the toilet seat. That's right. Shit. On the toilet seat.

This is the second time this happens. I'm working with fucking monkeys here. One of these days they'll start throwing feces at each other. I just hope I'll be long gone when it happens.

When even the gift mug you got from your coworkers has a bug in the code...

Consultant: "you should deploy a website. Use wordpress and have a draft ready in a few days. It's easy."

Me: "It's a static website, a one-pager even. I think we would be better served with something light-weight without a database."

Consultant: "99% of the websites in the entire internet are powered by wordpress. It's state of the art, you should use it"

Me: 😢 "Nooo, it needs mainentance and stuff. Look, XY is much simpler. You can even version the static site with git"

Consultant: 😤

We ended up with wordpress for our static website now. I am so proud. I absolutely love wordpress. It is amazing. Now my static one-pager can have plugins, multiple users, security issues and all that. The future is now!

Of course there's fucking AI included in the description.

*food comes in at work today*
Fellow engineer: yum yum yum!
Me: apt apt apt!
All engineers: 😑

😅

But but.. MacBook Pro 😬😏

A sys admin in his natural environment.

Programming in a tree. I usually climb up here and read, but I decided to code, and I didn't drop my laptop :D

I covered the screen with my hand because my code's ugly, and I don't want anyone to see it lol.

Upon suggestion of @platypus I went to the cafe and just took my tablet there (unfucking the laptop's rootfs flash drive took too long, and ArduinoDroid's avrdude didn't seem to work very well), so just doing some chatting in IRC and trying to figure out how the hell I'm supposed to make a serial link to a Proxmox VM from the host (thinkstation on the top left pane).

Attached below is the screenshot of that.. much turminel, very h3xx0r! But so far nobody has come up to me calling me "evul h3xx0r" yet.. very intriguing! I expected things to be much worse.

A glass of Duvel in front of me, tastes great! Cheers!

Somehow, every skill I have seems to decrease as the number of people around me increase.

Not a rant, just finally mustering up the strength to say Hello World!

This is so mean