And on Fridays we all say together...

✨
✨ DON'T ✨
✨
✨ PUSH ✨
✨ ✨
✨ TO ✨
✨
✨ PRODUCTION ✨
✨
✨

Who else agree this?

Why are you expected to have people management skills as your experience grows? I don't want to deal with people, I just want to deal with my code 😢😫

Nobody:
My dad: hey how do i do {{thing}} with this trucks multimedia system? What? No i dont know the exact model or release date or software version, arent you a programmer? You should know this without ever even seeing the outside of the car.

My mom got audited for storing sensitive client information in her gmail account without using a vpn or any other real security.

I had been telling her this was an issue for literally the last three years and shes brushed me off every time.

I got yelled at for not telling her I was serious.

PSA: Please don't dump 10GB of your personal photos on your company's shared drives. Especially dont have the photos include such things as nudes and pictures of your social security card.

-- kthx

After countless hours trying to spell my name for customer service over the phone, I made a little webpage that helps me spell words phonetically! 💬

https://dialogue.now.sh

Will I ever get used to not seeing my colleagues everyday anymore after leaving a job? 😩

First internship (ranted about it before).

- Had to google translate their entire internal crm.
- pointed out major security flaws and got a speech saying that "I shouldn't think so high of myself and I didn't have the fucking right to criticize their products"
- every time the boss came to the office after a failed sales presentation, we (interns) got called the most nasty stuff. Yes. We didn't have anything to do with that at all.
- I had "hygiene issues": window to the south with 35-40 degrees (Celsius) feeling temperature and no airco. Deo didn't really make a difference but wasn't allowed to use it there anyways. Details: I have a transpiration issue so I sweat shitloads more than other people, that didn't help at all.
- nearly got fired because I had to to to the doctor in company time for a serious health issue.
- was (no kidding) REQUIRES to use internet explorer and we were monitored constantly.

Self esteem dropped through the fucking ground there.

Hey guys, Today I created my first action on google assistant an it got deployed. I'm very happy and also I got the mail for the shirt. With 2 months I'll get it. I'm trying to make the action run in English and Hindi (Nation language of India) so that I can earn google home.

Move over, James Damore. You have a new ally. And, she’s a woman.

Microsoft engineer complains that company is biased against white men
Internal memo suggests that women don't think the right way to be engineers.

https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy...

My bird fell asleep on the laptop while licking the shiny LENOVO logo.

!rant
Our lead dev in the company seems to be a smart guy who's sensitive about code quality and best practices. The current project I'm working on (I'm an intern) has really bad code quality but it's too big an application with a very important client so there's no scope of completely changing it. Today, he asked me to optimize some parts of the code and I happily sat down to do it. After a few hours of searching, profiling and debugging, I asked him about a particular recurring database query that seemed to be uneccesarilly strewn across the code.
Me: "I think it's copy pasted code from somewhere else. It's not very well done".
Lead Dev: "Yeah, the code may not the be really beautiful. It was done hurriedly by this certain inexperienced intern we had a few years back".
Me: "Oh, haha. That's bad".
Lead Dev: "Yeah, you know him. Have you heard of this guy called *mentions his own name with a grin*?"
Me: ...
Lead Dev: "Yeah, I didn't know much then. The code's bad. Optimize it however you like. Just test it properly"
Me: respect++;

Only one sticker.

I go door-to-door every Sunday, "Excuse me dear sir/madam, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior Haskell?".

Most people slam the door shut in my face, but every lost family I convert to the way of the monad is worth it.

Even if they don't believe in the same deity, even if they express their love for the divine through something as misguided as Typescript or Swift or whatever, as long as they embrace the truth of strong types and composable code, as long as they at least read the gospel of the functional style once in their lives, have one enlightened moment where they see the glory of morphisms, it's all good.

Nuclear controversy:

I like how devrant doesn't show the ranter's name in the feed, so that people can upvote in a more unbiased way, otherwise let's be honest girls will cause a rant points gender gap.

Every time I see a girl's profile badge, it has thousands of upvotes, I think some IT folks boot up a whole peep show in their head just out of seeing a female profile.

(don't take that seriously, it's just a funny thought, I don't think it's true, but it's worth the joke)

Overheard from the room next to mine:
Person 1: My computer is frozen ..
Person 2 (Not a native English speaker): Did you try to shut down and shut up ?

I signed the contract for my first software developer job! I just want to thank everybody here that’s pushed me to do better, challenged my assumptions, and contributed to my growth as a dev and person. You all are great.

So, my data is not complete, but after an email exchange with dfox, I'll stop the data collection.
I have just under 40k of users in my database, but have searched less than 10% of the possible userids (although as the ids get larger valid ones get sparser.).

I'm missing A LOT of people, the average user in my db joined on December 1, 2016.
Also some of my data is now almost a day old.
But here are some analytics anyways.

---- DEVRANT USER STATS v0.1.1----
39457 users currently in the database.
---- Score (++):
>0 : 15828
>20 : 11090
>100 : 6726
>500 : 2561
>1000 : 1451
>5000 : 191
>10000 : 67
>20000 : 24
>30000 : 13
>40000 : 8
>50000 : 2
>70000 : 1
>100000 : 1
0< : 170
Most [152854] : linuxxx
Least [-79] : bljj77
Avg : 175.86542311883824
---- Rants:
>0 : 13755
>1 : 10195
>5 : 5235
>10 : 3198
>100 : 206
Most [1045] : linuxxx
Avg : 4.043515725980181
---- Comments:
>0 : 14838
>1 : 12078
>5 : 8149
>10 : 6104
>100 : 1448
>1000 : 121
>10000 : 1
Most [16792] : linuxxx
Avg : 21.737993258483918
---- Upvoted:
>0 : 23425
>1 : 20794
>5 : 16030
>10 : 13340
>100 : 5255
>1000 : 1014
>10000 : 56
Most [86395] : dfox
Avg : 131.29799528600756
---- Favourites:
>0 : 4279
>1 : 2349
>5 : 1104
>10 : 744
>100 : 98
Most [2702] : chilledfrogs
Avg : 1.536381377195428

new kernel, who dis?

Pro tip: If you are a junior, or senior but new at the company, don't start your conversations with:

"We're doing X wrong. At my previous company we did / at school I learned /in this book I read / according to this talk I watched, the right way to do X is ..."

Instead try:

"I'm curious why were doing X this way. I'm used to doing it differently."

I love flat-hierarchy teams, and people who think about flaws in procedures and proactively try to improve the tools we use are awesome, but the next kid walking up to me yelling we use git flow "wrong" will be smacked in the face with a keyboard.

If you come to me with curiosity and an open mind, I'll explain, and even return the favor by behaving the same way when I'm baffled by your seemingly retarded implementations.

Maybe we can learn from each other, maybe discover that "how I learned it" is sometimes good, sometimes bad.

But let's start with some social skills, not kicking off into every debate with a stretched leg and a red face.

Actual Name problems... Lol

devRant meetup in the Netherlands yesterday was awesome! Hereby a group picture we took.

Thanks for the amazing evening, people!

I left for lunch early to drive five miles away to an abandoned parking lot so that I could cry about an email I received... this week has been fantastic.

I fucking hate Drupal

app ideas...

Fuck this I need to ventilate.

Thinking about job change because maintaining and extending 3 years old codebase (flask project) is FUCKIN exhausting. It was badly written since start by someone who obviously didn't know much about python. (Going by commit history.)

Examples:
- if var != None / if var == None
- if var is not None / if var is None (well..)
- Returning self-parsed obscure JSONs from dict variable
- Serializing dictionaries into database by str() (both sqlalchemy and mysql support JSON format) - THEY ARE ALMOST UNUSABLE OTHER WAY AROUND (luckily, python can deal even with that)
- celery tasks, the way they are called they BLOCK the whole flask (not bad in itself, but if connection breaks there are no errors, nothing it just hangs)
- obscure generator/yielding that contains return of flask's response in itself
- creating fifteen thousands of variables one by one where they would look so nicely as dict keys, and hey they are then both MANUALLY SERIALIZED into returning dict by "%s" (string formatting) [okey, some of them are objecst like datetime but MATE WTF]
- many, many more, PEP lint shall not pass

I would rather deal with fresh startup owners wanting me to program unicorns in one week then trying to extend and manage zombie-like projects.

Nothing personal against the firm I actually like the place.

Holy shit I bought some 'entry-level' audiophile earphones, and I never knew you could experience so much joy from music alone 😮

Got 2 interviews incoming :)

When a full-stack developer credits the whole team

Before you rant, make sure it's not a repost.
Q: How do you know if it's a repost?
A: If it's a meme on the internet, so very probably that it's already posted here.. so don't