First, they came for those who Open Source'd code.
And I did not speak out, because my code could never be used by anyone out of the company, anyway.

Then, they came for the Trade Unionists.
And I did not speak out, because I was not in a union.

Then, they came for those who worked from home.
And I did not speak out, because I was granted an exception.

Then, they came for Scrum Masters and other Agile practitioners.
And I did not speak out, because fuck those spreadsheet jockeys productivity thespians.

Then, they came for in-house Data Analysts and Data Engineers.
And there was no one left to speak out for us.

Yeah, folks. The day finally came. I'm officially updating my LinkedIn and putting a ridiculous sash under my picture, "open to work". The Layoffs came for me, too.

"Kiki, I want you to, for the first time of your career at %company%, quit worrying about deadlines and just wander free. Forget about due projects, forget about everything, and just do your crazy experiments till the end of this month."

This was the one-to-one with our CEO today. Yes, I'm being paid to do whatever I want without time restrictions, as long as it is related to my field.

And you know what? At this stage of my life, I don't even want to exploit that, to weasel my way around definitions and justify doing nothing. I legit have three AI experiments to run, I have money to run them, I have time, and I for sure have motivation.

Good workplace is when doing nothing isn't the most desirable thing to do.

It took 8 months, but my code finally broke production!

- I'm trying to connect to the server at your location. What's the IP address?
- You can just write localhost there.
- 🤦‍♂️

"our placeholder shows an @ symbol, but please don't use an @ symbol!"

i'm so happy knowing that the devs and designers who created this app are earning 20x what i am

🤡🌎

Fans of Gavin Belson
(Check email placeholder)

This trend is becoming really annoying really fast…

Bitmap.GetPixel isn't AI lmao

It remembers me of the "put blockchain everywhere" era.

Being asked to search in the garbage for a disposed bill.

Fuck this piece of shit!
Windows 11 and Teams.
Fucking garbage!

ChatGPT4: if you liked getting "wireframes" from fuckwit sales people, you're going to love getting "code" from them.

“I don’t know whether I’m alive and dreaming or dead and remembering. How can you tell what’s a dream and what’s real, when you can’t even tell when you’re awake or when you’re asleep? Where am I?”

Metallica -One

Woke up with this on my mind.

task failed successfully

I am amazed. I witnessed (mostly heard) a 14 year old girl calm down a young adult female suffering an anxiety attack before I managed to push through people on the tram. She told her to close her eyes, breath, tell her what she smells, then open her eyes, name first thing that she sees, then look left, name first thing, etc.

This is called sensory grounding and it works. And yeah, what she did was pretty awesome but this isn't what amazed me the most. I asked where she learned that and she said "from a game about apes". And I knew exactly which game she meant. There's a title called Ancestors: The Humankind Odyssey and among many interesting mechanics there's one that puts the player in a state of anxiety when they venture into an unknown territory. The way to win that part is by analyzing surroundings by vision, hearing and the sense of smell before a panic countdown goes to zero. It's called "conquering your fear". Holly fuck, I played that and I didn't connect the dots. Are games nowadays teaching kids how to handle real life crisis? Where were those games when I was a kid??

I thought that as a senior software engineer, I would have the time and freedom to solve various interesting programming problems.
In reality, I spend most of my time doing PowerPoint presentations.

Applied peroxide to a wound? You're a nurse now.

You don't.

i dislike the people that dont take mental illnesses seriously. its a serious thing and they don’t think its a real thing because they havent been through it.

Well we have this hamster ....and lots of free time..so crypto??

Fuck Xcode. Worthless fucking piece of fucking crap.

[WARNING] THIS RANT IS NOT FOR HULKS OR SHE-HULKS

Here we fucking go again, currently, the time is 1:09 am in Malaysia, while I received a Pull request, so as a senior software engineer it is my duty to review the code before approving to merge develop branch. And this mother fucker decided to do this right after our CTO warned him about his coding style. Refer to https://devrant.com/rants/4699002/... for free cancer.

Our entire team is not happy working with this mother fucker, he is too arrogant.

Btw if he wants to insult me using codes, at least have the decency to draw some UML diagram , write proper documentation and write a proper logic, isn't better?

The "backend developer" has to know everything.

Manager: Why haven’t you shipped any code today? It’s almost lunch.

Dev: Stuck on a bug

Manager: I’ll help you

Dev: Please don—

Manager: Have you tried thinking outside the box?

Dev: …Dear god please end my existence

Manager: You could try stack overflow too, have you ever used that site before?

Dev: 😮 🔫

Manager: Also sometimes bugs are caused by npm modules so rule that out first

Dev: *On knees praying to Zues for forgiveness and/or conveiniently placed lightning strike*

My second prototype of the studio equalizer. It’s not even close to being done. It’s barely even started.

new document writers💩

Manager: Why aren’t you working?

Dev: I am, I’m just not typing because I’m thinking an issue out.

Manager: Well what is taking so long? You haven’t written any code for like 15 minutes, you’ve just been doodling on your notepad.

Dev: I’m not “doodling”. I’m taking notes and trying to visualize the issue. It’s a complicated issue with application stat—

Manager: Well just simplify it then

Dev: ?

Manager: Instead of making it a complicated issue just simplify it and then it won’t take you so long. You’re likely overthinking it, I never spend more than 30 seconds thinking about any issue before coming up with a solution. That’s what makes me so effective at my job is my ability to be lean like that.

Dev: …this issue is a bit harder than deciding what to have for lunch

Job posting: Backend Developer ruby-php
Question 1: Please describe your experience with Java and J2EE.

Boss: What's the estimate?
Dev: A month
---
Boss: What if we add one more engineer?
Dev: Two months
---
...
Boss: If we add a PM
Dev: Trust me. You don't wanna know

I haven't started yet, but I will start with a small and simple operating system for microcontrollers written in C++.

Well, I did it.

I spent 45 minutes writing my first hacky, shell-and-python automation script to save me 15 seconds every morning.

Frontend vs backend