Last year, we had to do a big university project in randomly selected groups (5-6 students in every group).Three of the five guys were completely useless, I mean, both the other competent guy and me wrote around 20,000 lines of code each, the other ones wrote around 500 lines of code (combined).
After our first few meetings we quickly knew that we have to give them a small task which was so trivial that not even they can fuck it up. But we were wrong. Oh boy, so wrong.
They simply had to code the excel export of the data, which means they had to use two functions from a library and pass the correct data. But their solution was so bad, I lost faith in humanity and was fascinated by it at the same time.
For example, there was this simple class "Room", which had a few properties like size or number of seats and a few getter/setter etc. That was a core class and written by the other qualified guy. So how did the others fuck up the excel export? They somehow rewrote that class in German (although the other code was completely in English), implemented a function for each property that would write its value to a hardcoded cell in a hardcoded excel file.
And this was just the tip of the iceberg. Needlessly to say that I had to rewrite the whole export in the night before we had to present the project.

Night before flying internationally includes the following checklist:

- check VPN works, can access frontend sites and hit the backend
- git push

change my mind

Dear windows 10

I won't mind a weekly 30 minutes update but...

My ubuntu connects to wifi in 2 seconds
My lubuntu connects to wifi in 2 seconds
My archlinux connects in 1 second(don't ask why)
My raspbian starts up and connects in 10 seconds

WHY WOULD YOU TAKE MORE THAN A SYSTEMS BOOTING PROCESS TO GET CONNECTED?

All devs in the company are booked 120% until late summer. Boss just sold another 6000 hours cloud project to kick off in 2 weeks. I’m the PM, and my colleagues will hate me for this thinking that it’s my fault they have to work their asses off for the next 5 months!

Does anyone else find the email standard opener of

Dear Name

To be too informal?

Q: Why do real JAVA programmers wear glasses? {0_0}
A: Because they don't C#. {-_-}

I love JetBrains icons so much I converted all my most common apps' icons to reskined JetBrains' IDE icons

#devRantConfessional

The documentation was in Japanese because he doesn’t understand English

Like, how am I supposed to collab with you

Our parent company wouldn’t give us DB login credentials to a customer server outside our territory... we tried the default username and password and it worked...

Simple story i got a freaking job !!!! From my internship !

https://github.com/enkidevs/...
https://github.com/sagelabs/...

A repository says more then a thosand words.

Just saw this

WhatsApp is drunk with ASCII!
#privacy_edit

devrant stuff, forgot the sticker

stackexchange is also as similar as stackoverflow

Wtf is this? Austrian telecom company admits storing all passwords in clear text saying they are too secure to be hacked....

Read here:
https://twitter.com/tmobileat/...

My face when a customer cancels the order to develop an online shop for them, just to instead build the shop on their own using a 5€/mo webpage builder.

The fuck?

NO. I will not write code for a website on paper. And I will NOT draw my website. Go to hell.

just saw a production level code, all the fucking variables in the code are in capital letters🤪😵😵😵

*senior designer*

Last year I had a meeting with the newly hired Senior Graphics Designer.

She was presenting the new design of the company's website with all the features she wants.

After a few minutes, I asked her, did you design it as a responsive website?

"What is that?" She said. I said that the website should display or have atleast a design for mobile view and desktop view.

And she replied, "is that a requirement?"

Talks to myself: how the hell we hire designers like this?

PS, she earns 4x my salary

Client: thank you for working through your weekend w___. We really appreciate that.
Me: can you please appreciate on LinkedIn?

I've shown my devDuck to other people in my school. At first, they did not understand but I initiated them to how a ducky can be useful and now they're playing with my duck (yeah, duck) and they're so noisy I'm going to regret it

Someone tell me why I still work here?

Ruby is rubbish! PHP is phpantastic_! 😛😛😛

When you are surfing on a website (a provider for mail-sending) and you suddenly get a HTTP 503.

I guess, I'll wait then.

Never trust Windows to do anything right

Had a coworker who made an export program, which should run one time every 24 hours and create and export some files.

He made it with a timer, that ran 24 hours before doing anything. Which meant that when he made changes to the program, he would have to wait f***ing 24 hours to see the new result.

!devRant
App review on play store. He wants login with facebook or else he won't use devrant :)