Details
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AboutAn Apple developer since 1984, disenfranchised and pissed at Apple for turning from excellence to a bunch of fuckups.
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SkillsAny assembly (I piss machine code). Any communications system. C, C++ Objective C, Fortran if pressed, AppleScript for fun, FileMaker because other databases suck dick.
Joined devRant on 4/11/2017
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Swift, oh my god, why do you have to be like this?
I'm looking to write a simple for loop like this one in java
for(int i = 5; i > 0; i--) {
// do shit
}
Thats it, simple, go from 5 to 1 (inclusive), I saw that to iterate over a range in a for loop (increasing ordeR) I can do this
for i in 0...5 {
// do shit.
}
So I thought maybe I could do this to go in reverse (which seems logical when you think about it doesn't it?)
for i in 5..<0 {
// do shit
}
But no, this compiles FINE (THIS IS THE FUCKING KICKER IT COMPILES), alright, when you the code runs you get a fucking exception that crashes the mother fucking application, and you know what the problem is?? This dogshit, shitStain of a language doesn't like it when integer that the for loop starts with is larger than the integer that the for loop ends with MOTHERFUCKER ATLEAST TELL ME THAT AT COMPILE TIME AS A MOTHERFUCKING WARNING YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!
Alright *deep breathing*, now we can't just be stuck on this raging, we're developers need to move forward, so I google this, "Swift for loop in reverse" fair enough I get a straight forward answer that tells me to use the `stride` functionality. The relevant code for it
for i in stride(from:5 to:1 by:-1) {
// do shit
}
Wow looks fine and simple right?? (looks like god damn any other language if you ask me, no innovations here piece of shit apple!) WRONG BITCHES !!! In the latest version of Swift THE FUCKING DEVELOPERS DECIDED TO REMOVE STRIDE ALTOGETHER, WITHOUT ADDING IN A GOOD REPLACEMENT FOR THAT SHIT!
Alright NOW IM FUCKING MAD, I got rage on stackoverflow chat, a guy who's been working on ios for quite a while comes up n says and I quote
"I can sort of figure it out, but besides that, iterating in reverse is uncommon enough that it probably hasn't crossed anyone's mind."
Now hope you guys understand my frustration, and send me cookies to calm me down.
Thank you for listening to me !27 -
Are HR universally incompetent? I recently rejected an offer from a company mostly because of their incompetent HR.9
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My TEN YEAR OLD twin girls came to me with a TIMESHEET and PIE CHARTS to explain to me why "Our household would benefiter (sic) a Nintendo Switch".
They... actually did what for an intern would be a passable data storytelling job (orthographic errors aside).
They explained how they would share the videogame between themselves (because it is not allowed at their school, not that we would let them bring it there anyway) in a colorful timesheet spanning four days a week.
They even put a pie chart showing how most of the time nobody will be using it.
I feel at the same time immensely proud, scared, and a wee bit freaked out that they came with all that to me but with their mother they just talked. Do I seem so distant that they feel they can't convince me without data? I gotta watch out for using work jargon at home.
Anyway, first "interns" that I have ever seen using a pie chart with the appropriate number of classes (even if highly biased).11 -
I am witnessing Einsteins theory of relativity first hand, I’m amazed. The closer I get to Microsoft products, the slower my velocity becomes. At 9 PM, I have tried to connect a MS SQL Server to an ERP System for 30 minutes. After this piece of shit robbed me of all my energy, I look at the clock and it’s midnight. Go die in a dumpster fire Microsoft4
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I applied for a position as an engineer for a nonprofit organization that helped kids across the country (and the world) and got the position. The people across the organization were wonderful and, without a doubt, mission driven to help kids and it felt good to do the work. The agile teams worked well together, every team had their roadmaps, and management always emphasized family first. The organization was making crazy money so we were given all the tools we needed to succeed.
Then, within a few months of my hiring, it was announced that the non-profit organization was being bought by a large, fairly well known for-profit company which had also been recently acquired by a venture capital firm.
The next thing we knew, everything changed all at once. We went from building applications for kids to helping this company either make money or build value for their owners. Honestly, I did not know what my day-to-day work was doing for this company. The executives would tell us repeatedly that we were expensive and not a good value compared to their other teams. It felt like we were only being kept until the systems were integrated and their had access to our decades of data.
You might think I'm being paranoid but a year after the acquisition, we still did not have any access to any of their systems. We operated on a separate source code solution and were not given access to theirs. When requests came from them that would facilitate them connecting applications to the data, it was to be considered highest priority.
The final straw for me was when I was told my compensation would be cut for the next year. We were strung along for the whole year leading up to it saying that the company was evaluating our salaries compared to others in the industry. Some of us figured that we would probably even go up knowing that we were underpaid for a for-profit tech company because we chose to work in a non-profit for a lower rate to be able to do worthwhile work. Nope! We were told that we were overpaid and they talked about how they had the data to prove it. One quick look at LinkedIn would tell you they must be smoking something that had gotten stale in a shoebox. Or they were lying.
So that was my rant. If you think you are protected from the craziness in tech right now just because you are writing code at a nonprofit, you might be wrong. Dishonest executives can exist anywhere.3 -
I hate cloud services, dependencies and updates.
It's a snowball system and we are all caught inside. -
I’m getting really tired of all these junior-turn-senior devs who can’t write simple code asking ChatGPT to solve everything for them.
I’m having to untangle everything from bizarre organization/flow to obvious gotchas / missed edge cases to ridiculously long math chains (that could be 1/10th the length), or — and I feel so dirty for this — resorting to asking ChatGPT wtf it was thinking when it obviously wrote some of these monstrosities. Which it gets wrong much of the time.
“ALL HAIL CHATGPT!” Proclaims the head of Engineering. “IT’S OUR PRODUCTIVITY SAVIOR! LEVERAGING AI WILL LET US OUTPERFORM THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY!”
Jesus fucking christ.28 -
I often don't see devs sad about the lack of sex in their lives.
Is it because we get fucked in the ass by management every now and then, to make up for it?4 -
Story from my friend who I drank a beer with yesterday:
His manager has balls bigger than elefants.. Hiring a group of anarcho kinda pentest / hacker fucks from a freelance portal from Serbia... Who found quite some shit in their internal systems.
You should think twice about paying them late and especially paying them only half the amount. Even though "they wouldn't sue them anyway".
Sure, they won't.
But take a smart guess what they did.
Fuckin idiot manager.6 -
if the stars align, i will have a dobie sometime early 2024. i want to only go through ethical breeders, so the wait has been long, but it’s worth it. i’ve never had a dog before and i’m SO excited !!!
pic is of momma and one of her puppers from a previous litter, but we will be keeping the ears floppy :)16 -
Non technical people are interesting. Not only do we have to switch to unga bunga language to help them, but they accuse us of man-splaining when we do.5
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A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.
It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.
Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).
So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...
So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.
We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!398 -
"The best predictor for a software engineer's career trajectory is grit, the ability to handle discomfort, and operate in a perpetual state of uncertainty." -- Gunnar Kudrjavets.7
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when the swift language cannot infer the generic type from the invocation, it also doesn't want you to explicily specify generic type in the bracket...
says i have a method:
```
func createDeferred<T>() -> ABC.XYZ.Deferred<T>
```
then if you call it like this:
```
let dfd = createDeferred()
```
It complaints that it cannot infer generic type T, which make sense.
But it also doesn't want you to code it this way:
```
let dfd = createDeferred<Int>("countProperty")
```
if you do so, it mumbles gibberish: "Cannot explicitly specialize a generic function".
What it actually trying to say is, you should put the type somewhere else so that it can show off its smartness to "infer" it from there:
```
let dfd: ABC.XYZ.Deferred<Int> = createDeferred()
```
with a few more typing and findout what exact type it is, it finally works.
the moral of the story is, in order to communicate with the wonderful work apple genius made, you don't tell it what is the answer straight away, that's defiance, you must hide the answer somewhere intricately and let the smarty swifty swift to find it out for you.6 -
I slowly relise that "modrn" developpers don't know a minimal things about programming (yes, i'm using "programming" instead of "evelopping")
They copy paste shit, it works. They resolve some problems it works.
But... They have have ZERO understading of what they are doing.
Just couple of days, got a discution with a person who is "Blazor expert". who will be paied 200$ / hour to find problem in current implementation. I KNOW there are problems because couple of them I introduced my self.
We at server side. I provided test logins, plus 10 page document explaining infrastracture.
One of his first question in interview : "Oh. I cannot see ajax calls in network in chrome".
WTF DUDE ? Do you even understand how server side blazor works ?!
Welp, he is hired. FOrt 120 hours.
I' want to see what he will present, as it's clear as day he doesn't know a thing about server side blazor architecture.8 -
2,8 trillion dollar company btw. Unannounced maintenance (not showing up on their status page either). Wanted to publish a fucking ios bugfix, now I can't do shit.6
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"our placeholder shows an @ symbol, but please don't use an @ symbol!"
i'm so happy knowing that the devs and designers who created this app are earning 20x what i am
🤡🌎6 -
I think it's the first time I see 1 million lines changed in a single commit. Amazing.
https://github.com/DrKLO/Telegram/...5 -
Okay, seriously, who invented merge conflicts? I want names! It's like playing Jenga with code, hoping your masterpiece doesn't topple over. I've seen more ">>>>>> HEAD" blocks than actual code lately.
Can we all agree to commit more frequently and save my sanity, please?5 -
What is it with the every programmer ‘s obsession with providing additional configuration options?
Make a god damned decision please!
Throw one away!21 -
I’ve been working in a toxic environment for the past 1.5 years and realized that I’m actually going to have a tough time finding a job outside because my coding skills has gone to rust (been delegated to mostly support role in a startup, almost IT support or project mgmt).
I recently did an interview for a C++ gig and was rejected due to not being sufficient enough.
I’m actually really feeling defeated. It almost feels like I’ve falling into a trap I can’t get out of. I could use some advice6 -
give up on working hard
doesn't mean shit in the long run
it only matters who you can bullshit and how much money they have
*really* i mean this
at this point i've seen it so many times, and i thought the world couldn't be this dumb... but somehow that's really how it all works, there's really no secret
much better to just have had internship at some silicon valley company - their for loops, functional code, and abstracted classes are far better than the ones anywhere else, don't you know?
just wish the world would grow the fuck up, but alas, they have to remain wimpy kiddy caveman mentality style5 -
Dear xcode,
you fckn bitch did it again. I really wanted to do some iOS development, I swear. But you are like an abusive relationship, I have this weird habit of coming back to you even though I am getting fucked in the ass in parallel.
I love Swift but I despise you xcode. Randomly fucking up my workflow, and then it is clean build folder, reset package cache, restart xcode. Again and again and again you fuck things up out of nowhere. And from time to time, you just have to install the newest version of xcode because its so fucked up its easier to download this MASSIVE asshole than to even try to fix anything if you know its just xcode again.
Yeah, fuck extensions and formatting. Just fuck humanly tolerable build time. Fuck you xcode.
I am not an experienced dev with iOS nor am I a common Mac user but this is just wrong. I feel violated and the joy of development sucked out of my soul while I try to navigate through the overloaded interface.
I am not even going into details about iOS development, its just that xcode is the gatekeeper to get me the fuck out of this miserable place that is native iOS development.
Arrivederci, suckers.4