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Skillsjs, c#
Joined devRant on 1/29/2022
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I fucking give up, AWS is retarded. It's the worst piece of shit retarded fucking platform ever created and every fucking engineer that touched the code should have their fingers chopped off, shoved down their throats and then be beheaded.
I can't believe that this retarded shit is the "industry standard" for deploying anything ever. Every fucking page feels and uses as if it was fucking outsourced to a different part of india everytime. The fucking pagination behaves differently in every fucking service. Half of the new services just gave up and run on their own fucking thing, because presumably their own platform just couldn't even handle it anymore and fucking CloudFormation is the fucking kingpin of this entire retarded platform. Slapping and unslapping shit together unttil it fucking get's stuck in an unresolvable state because half the fucking services need 58 unrelated permissions to perform a simple delete.
Fuck AWS, Fuck Amazon, Fuck Bezos, Fuck the Cloud and Fuck this whole "Serverless" scam. I really truly wish everyone that had anything to do with making AWS a reality just drop dead on the spot right now so that we can forget that aws ever happened.11 -
I’m getting really tired of all these junior-turn-senior devs who can’t write simple code asking ChatGPT to solve everything for them.
I’m having to untangle everything from bizarre organization/flow to obvious gotchas / missed edge cases to ridiculously long math chains (that could be 1/10th the length), or — and I feel so dirty for this — resorting to asking ChatGPT wtf it was thinking when it obviously wrote some of these monstrosities. Which it gets wrong much of the time.
“ALL HAIL CHATGPT!” Proclaims the head of Engineering. “IT’S OUR PRODUCTIVITY SAVIOR! LEVERAGING AI WILL LET US OUTPERFORM THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY!”
Jesus fucking christ.28 -
Cook A:
1 - Makes a soup
2 - Leaves a mess
Company: ☺️ What a nice cook, here's your promotion to senior Cook.
Cook B:
1 - Cleans kitchen
2 - Makes soup
3 - Cleans after themself
Company: 😡 What took you so long!? Cook A made it in 1/3 of the time.
This is the pattern I've seen so far in development... and it's sad20 -
AWS has identified suspicious activity on my account.
I'm using it for the first time in 2 years. That's the suspicious activity.5 -
Interviewer: Do you know what Kubernetes is?
Dev: Yeah, that’s the greek god of spending money in the cloud.
Interviewer: Actually Kubernetes is an orchestration tool. Have you not been on a project that uses it yet?
Dev: …9 -
Is it done yet?
Stop micromanaging! We are providing updates every morning, what difference does it make to ask for the update in the evening?!? Don't think no one can see that all you are asking is "is it done yet?"
Like a small child who does not understand the concepts of travel yet, you won't understand why "such a small change" takes so long. It's because we are scooping all the crap, patched by assholes who cared only to please you and did not had the courage to say no to your pressure and do things smart way.
If you think it is necessary to keep reminding everyone to do their job - then you you do not belong in IT.3 -
[WARNING] THIS RANT IS NOT FOR HULKS OR SHE-HULKS
Here we fucking go again, currently, the time is 1:09 am in Malaysia, while I received a Pull request, so as a senior software engineer it is my duty to review the code before approving to merge develop branch. And this mother fucker decided to do this right after our CTO warned him about his coding style. Refer to https://devrant.com/rants/4699002/... for free cancer.
Our entire team is not happy working with this mother fucker, he is too arrogant.
Btw if he wants to insult me using codes, at least have the decency to draw some UML diagram , write proper documentation and write a proper logic, isn't better?62 -
!rant
It's been a while since I posted here. My previous workplace was a 101 on how to burn out people.
But now I am working at a place where:
- People are 0 toxic.
- Sprints follow the premise "under promise, over deliver."
- I was having trouble sleeping (for reasons) a couple of months ago, and my boss literally told me, "If you can't sleep at night, take a few days, or if you can fall asleep in the morning, just sleep in the morning until you manage to do otherwise. Talk with your team and rearrange the meetings if you have and rest. "
- All pieces of the company (sales, narketing, product, data, devs) have a clean roadmap.
- Product and bizz understand when something can't be done on the next sprint and why sometimes some features are delayed.
- They pay well, even raising the pay twice to account for inflation.
- Full remote, If I want to go to the office, Its my choice.
I need to keep this job no matter what!8 -
I told these people that this issue would happen. Did they listen? Nooo
It'll be fine, they say. We likely won't be having that much data returned to the front end, they say.
Day of the install. Web Application attempts to query 68,000 rows of data straight into the web page.
*Surprised Pikachu face* when they are consistently getting crashed browser tabs.
And now everything gets pushed back and we're behind by an entire month because they didn't heed my warnings.
Oh, and now I have to pick up after them, and do some stupid work arounds that will likely be defunct in a month or two. 🙄5 -
ahaha. The white Slack emoji skintone is frowned upon at $work, and we're encouraged to use the yellow one instead to be "inclusive" -- but fear not, the brown ones are totally fine.
Gotta love woke companies.20 -
Over the course of a few months, I began to suspect my manager disliked me on a personal level. I decided to be proactive and invited him to a meeting on "Improving our working relationship" - he showed up 5 minutes late and fired me.11
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Got a complaint from users of my project. It’s finally happened: people give a shit to tell me I’m doing a bad job. Let’s fucking gooooo3
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FUCK WEB3, FUCK CRYPTO, FUCK NFTS, FUCK ALL THIS PONZI ASS BIG BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU WHOEVER MADE THJS!!!! THE ONLY ONES WHO PROFIT ARE NOT THE ONES WHO BUY CRYPTO OR JPEGS BUT THE ONES ON TOP OF THIS PYRAMID WHO CREATED IT!!!!! MIGHT AS WELL CODE MY OWN PYRAMID COIN/JPEG AND SELL IT TO SUCKERS!!!!!!!! FCKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!11
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Is it really unreasonable that I wish aws would just name their fucking products after what they are? Why the fuck is dns called route 53? Why the fuck is a vm an elastic cloud compute node? Stop being pretentious dicks and just name things what they are!
Am I being unreasonable?7 -
Im getting tired of this fucking scrum team.
First of all let me introduce our backend team which takes 3 weeks to add one fucking column to database and in the end turns out they fucked up RabbitMQ RPC implementation so the column is not syncing with our app at all so now we have to wait 2 extra weeks until that will be working. Best part is that backend fucker who fucked up doesnt even feel like hes blocking a feature and would rather sit for extra few days and do nothing until he gets reassigned his pile of shit back to him than clean up his own shit.
Then we have business analytic who doesnt know how to define tasks properly so I have to record each grooming meeting so I would know what to fucking implement because he doesnt even bother to take proper notes. Which results in not fully defined tasks, which results in unexpected behaviours and MR's stuck in limbo for weeks.
Also lets not forget QA guy who doesnt even bother writing scenarios, I as an app dev have to write them myself just to be sure that fucker will test everything thoroughly.
Then we have fucking devs from consultancy agency who apparently have 6 years of experience (I have barely 2) and these fuckers are spamming me daily with the most basic questions. After each grooming they rush to assign themselves tasks which are not even defined properly yet and not even in this sprint, but fuckers are lazy so thy want to reserve easier tasks for themselves. Pathetic.
At least I have a decent senior on my team, but sometimes he patronizes me so much that I start asking me what I am doing in this team.
Fuck this shit, I asked for a 43% raise and if Im not getting it in 2-3 weeks im outta here. Fuckers.5 -
BUZZWORD BUZZWORD AAAAAH
ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE
BLOCKCHAIN
ALGORITHM
CLOUD
IOT
BIG DATA
SaaS
DEVOPS
5G
AR
VR
AAAAH BUZZWORD HERE BUZZWORD THERE4 -
Mentor: “Hey, have you checked the Figma for the designs?”
Me: “What’s Figma?”
Mentor: “Figma nuts in your mouth”
I loved him. I will die for him.5 -
i hate this "She-EO" crap. they can call that feminism all they want, but all it does is set back women 40 years. yes, your red blazer is gonna break the glass ceiling honey 🙄12
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Fucking Jira!
You fucking piece of fucking shit. You're about as useful as a nacho cheese enema.
Fuck Atlassian, fuck Jira, fuck fuck fuck fuck!13 -
Stop using anal as a variable or function name wherever I look I see anal_this and anal_that please stop. Use analyze, analyzer or whatever and not anal_insert ( ) or anal_check ()13
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Man do I love receiving bug reports and comments in Turkish, Russian, Portuguese or Iranian. I should really just start replying to those in Polish.
I added a humorous pinned post saying “By the way, I can only reply to you either in English, Polish or Dutch :)” to the program where I receive such reports.
I am aware it won’t do jackshit, because people can’t read.
Kurwa.10 -
Dear children let's talk about how to ask a f***ing question.
You don't just go "I need help. I can't figure it out." We had trainings on this, I sat through 3 hours holding your hand to help you try and understand things.
And yet now we have scheduled another 3 hours to help you figure this out because you said you were having difficulty with it because you couldn't figure it out. How about instead of just saying you "Need help", you start by
1. Explaining what you are trying to accomplish
2. What specific issue are you facing? Is there an error message or something?
3. What have you already tried thus far that didn't work?
Instead of "I NEED HELP I CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT!" that is the sign of a lazy f****ing engineer, someone who doesn't want to think, who doesn't want to learn something new who wants to just coast by. Especially when this is going to become an increasingly important part of your job.
And of course you currently are still a whole job level above me because sitting around and keeping a chair warm for 10 years means you are a valuable contributor, instead of what you can actually DO!
This bugs me so much. So remember kids, when you need help, or need to ask a question, ASK IT THE RIGHT F****ING WAY!6 -
My bosses, bosses, boss asked to call me up unexpectedly:
BBBoss:" Just wanted to say we are really happy with your performance, especially in these tough circumstances, ... "
Me thinking: "Ah, great I am getting laid off."
BBBoss: " ... which is why we decided to give you and extra 1000$ in you next paycheck."
Me: "??? ... for real."
BBBoss: "yes, thank you for your hard work."
Me: "I am still employed?"
BBBoss (laughs) :"Yes, we are happy to have you."8 -
Today we interviewed a _very_ good Angular1 Dev, by chance we showed him the forked ngRouter module we use, after some debate he explained that we were using it incorrectly.. I asked if he'd used it before to which he responded:
"Yeah, I'm the guy who built it"
😅27