So, what should I do?

Decided to put hello world into Google assistant and I got an interesting response.

Google I/O 2018: Google Duplex AI
Apple WWDC 2018: Dark mode

Me these days

My boss came into my room today, sat down and said:

Take your family to the [BIG AMUSEMENT PARK], and please keep the reciepts and give them to me. Spend a couple of hundreds bucks and we will pay.
Thanks for being someone whom I can trust

That made me happy

I say It's easy 👌

Someone on my Facebook was boasting that he now has 1Gb internet speed.

Turns out he bought a 1Gbit ethernet card for his PC and thought that alone would raise his broadband speed..

Shit, 24 hours is not enough for me to code and get 3 hours sleep !

Thank God for git

Decided that my old logo was absolute shit so i made a new one, looks pretty neato if you ask me 🙂

I do not give a flying fuck which Linux distro you are using.

All heil CLRS

Since past two-three years, Indian Government has been organizing a Hackathon called Smart India Hackathon for college students. And Luckily our team was selected this year.

This team had 5 Electronics Student and 1 Computer Student. Guess who the Computer Student was? Yea, Me.

They Knew nothing about Android Development. And the idea was about an Android Development. I was the only person who could code.

The centre for our hackathon was Varanasi and we live in Hyderabad. So we had to go there. I have not really travelled a lot in the trains (especially not this far from Hyderabad to Varanasi ). During the whole 37 hours journey, I was not able to sleep cause I am not accustomed to sleeping on a train.

The moment we reached Varanasi the hackathon had started which was 36 hours long. Normally team members switch places so that they can sleep but not ours. Cause I was the only one coding and it had to be done in this 36 hours. So add this up 36+36 hours of no sleep, I must have rarely slept for 3-4 hours in that 72 hours.

After the hackathon, I slept like a Snorlax whereas the other went for a trip around Varanasi ('_')

Been watching a lot of lectures on YouTube. They usually talk too slow.

Random guy : Well I'm not tracked on the internet, I use private tabs.
Me : Well, I'm not sleeping with your mom, I use condoms

Yay. Someone was on my website

On the presentation for my database project my team and I showed a NodeJS + Mongo + VueJS project with cloud storage capability, nothing fancy but did everything from scratch (from token auth and system encryption to the frontend CSS and the database) the teacher made some questions and meh'd at it.

Behold team two's project, WordPress with a standard template and phpMyAdmin, teacher loves it because "it's so beautiful"

Guess who just failed that class?

God I love college, it's the best time investment I've ever done and it'll surely pay out.

When they ask about the dress code

p.s: found it on the internet, don't if it is a repost here.

Git : Can't pull because there are uncommitted changes.

Me : *check the changes*

Git : None

Me : ಠ_ಠ

Aha 😀😀😀

SELECT finger FROM hand WHERE id = 3;

Will I be the only one who misses this key on the keyboards of some modern laptops?

My laptop... when I am searching for best laptops

The math problem we've all encountered once -

There are 8 apples. Jack ate 3. Find the mass of free elctron floating inside the atom of phosphorus.

Worth mentioning our client who asks similar questions. That fucker.

The truth.

1337 reputation on stack overflow

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No, dear M$, I can't tell you if sth is helpful after spening 5s on page, especially if 4s were spent loading the content!!!

configuring nginx is like trying anal for the first time

From the same teacher who tried to style a <title>

Mom : both are the same u idiot, what the hell you are learning now days

Me : mom pls ;_;