I can relate

SPOTTED: A place to store all your JavaScript Libraries

during my interview for a systems integration developer position

"now sell me this pen"

Last week I was studying Cocos2d-python, I had been awake for something like 35 hours, kept alive by cocacola and coffee, and while debugging I started to hear my rubber ducks talking, I've written their instructions on a blackboard, and now I'm working on that project...

And I was there like everything was normal, I had more caffeine and sugar in my body than water, I remember clearly saying "thanks weird talking duck!"

I'm trying to explain to this dumb mf-er why we can't use send data simply.
It's a mobile platform I said, you can't rely on having network I said, the dumbass users might try it on 2% battery I said.
DO'H BUT MY INTERZ CAN DO IT IN 5 MINUTES.
Yeah, enjoy crashing the app with asynctask like a stupid bitch. When it fails under nearly every possible condition that deviates from the ideal, you can go write down how great your interns are, eat it up, shit it out and when you grow a flower from that, then I might help you again.
Retard server people.

Seriously? Using umlauts in an URL?

This is what success looks like. Worth my whole night behind this :)

i never wanted lol

<?= 5;

Coding essentially is an infinite loop of:
1) wtf
2) ah yea

Add sprinkles of "that should be easy" and "why did i agree on this"

When life gives you lemons, develop an app that sells lemons.

Bae: come over
Me: can't, tests are failing
Bae: Flatmates aren't home
Me:

your life saviour. only developers will understand

That moment when starbucks open right below your apartment 😍 #freeWiFI

why do enterprise apps that cost millions have worse usability than word 97 still?

I've been slowly increasing the size of my tech manager's mouse cursor over the last month when he leaves his computer unlocked. It's about an inch tall now and he hasn't noticed yet. Everyone else in the office does and it's the best thing ever.

So I barely get home and I see my 10 year old sister in the living room coding with the Xcode Playground, I asked her where she learned how to do that and she said "I just read the books you had." I'm so proud. 😭🤘🏼

hey there I'm developing an android app,
started the work back in 2013 ,
waiting for gradle to finish the build
#androiddeveloper

I just wrote "git vomit" instead of "git commit".

"Java is to JavaScript as pain is to painting"

My boss baught me a new setup because he crashed into my car. I think i can accept this apology^^

It's also full of vitamins

If I could impress girls with my Java skills, I would still be single.

That akward moment when you realize that you are not in a linux shell!

I don't trust devs who don't drink coffee or tea. It's unnatural.

Disabling wifi to play the dino game in Chrome 😆

Stupid users gonna be stupid.