Every js dev I know

When you look at the old projects you abandoned on github

Friend: Bro there's a life outside the internet also
Me: Send me the link

I'm one of the first to use devrant. Shoutout to all batchmates out there

think twice code once

He wanted a project.
I gave him a project.
He wanted to collaborate.
We did collaborate.
He wrote nothing.
He left the project.
I have to finish the project...

At age of 20, I got hired as junior dev at a mobile gaming company. We were 2 junior devs hired at the same time and one of our senior colleagues made a prank: he came in the office before us and rearranged our offices in a "funny" manner.

Two days later I waited for him to go home. I opened his PC case, removed the power button cable from the motherboard and then re-arranged everything back to normal. Well, I couldn't resist...

Next day he came into the office and, well, surprise... the PC was not starting. He went to the IT department and they spent 4 hours trying to figure out why it was not working. They replaced the CPU, RAM memory, including the PSU.

I had to go and tell them: "maybe it's the power button jack?!".

I got into some problems for that prank. Indeed I crossed a line, but what the hell... that was a bad IT department.

Just a joke I found online:

One day I was facing some issue with Outlook and I raised a ticket to get it resolved. I got a call from the Service Desk lady after some time and it went this way:

Lady: Hi I'm calling from service desk, what is the problem?

Me: (I explained the problem).

Lady: Can you please share your screen and give me the control so that I can solve the issue?

Me: (I shared the screen and gave the control. She solved it!!)

Lady: You may close the ticket from your end, the issue is solved.

Me: Thank you very much, I will close the ticket.

I opened her profile in lync and had a look at her profile. The display pic looked small in size. I instantly messaged her Employee ID to my colleague and asked him to have a look at her. He replied "She looks good in some angles".

I tried searching her FB profile with the help of her name, but there were too many results.

I started searching on Linked In instead, I found her profile this time. I was trying to enlarge the profile pic and suddenly a message popped up - it says

"I'll share my better picture with you on your outlook ID but you may please stop sharing your screen??"
😂

Interviewer - so what's your email ID?

Candidate- sir, abc@xyz.com

Interviewer - and password?

Candidate- 12345678

Interviewer - you shared such a confidential information so easily for the job. How can we trust that you will not share any confidential information of the company for some better offers?

Candidate - Sir, I might have shared my password with you but I don't think you can still login to my email account. Let's look for the possibilities. My password can be

12345678

Or

Onetwothreefourfivesixseveneight

Or

1twothreefourfivesixseveneight

1twothreefourfivesixseven8….. so on

Or

2444666668888888 (one 2, three 4….)

13355557777778 (1, two 3, four 5……, 8)….. so on

Or

Combination of all of these…

By the way, did I mention use of capitals? 😂

Finally that candidate was offered with the position as
" HR Manager"

It changed my life, really. 😁

Yeah...Windows...

Following the trend..

Boss : Change the website to look more professional.

Me : Change comes from within.

*fired*

User:"It's not working"
Me:"Have you turned it off and on again?"
User:"Yes"
Me: goes down there, system uptime is 360days...
"How do you turn it off?"
User:"by pressing the button on the monitor

I joined the Dark side!
Did you?
😈👹👻👽🤖👾...

My first code:-

#include<stdio.h>
void main() {
printf("Hello Priya");
}

Output:- I have a boyfriend!

As much as i love Ubuntu... This is so true.

$age++;
echo "Happy Bday to me... 🎊🎉🍰" ;
😄

I just love pressing F5.

Why you say?

Cause it's so refreshing.

At a party.
Everyone dancing like crazy.
And I'm here devRanting.

I can't even type my name correctly if someone is looking on my screen.

I commit all my code for the day as one commit 😱

So true!

500.times do
press ++
end

=> Gets Stressball

I will find you and I will apply for you

Welcome to the team...

I was an intern - as a high school student. They had no idea what to do with an intern, let alone a high school student that was only there around three hours a day.

They tried to saddle me with a massive "how to use Perforce" manual, but I flat refused and told them to give me some real work.

In the end I wound up writing a text parser in Python to get some specific info from some files. They decided it wasn't actually needed after I finished it (I don't think they expected me to), on my last week there. I just played solitaire the rest of the time. I learned a few things:

1. I never want to work at Adtran.
2. Perforce should die in a fire.
3. Experience != Expertise.
4. Don't be afraid to put yourself on the line if it means potentially accomplishing something.

At university we had lessons in C++.
First lesson: Make a calculator
Second lesson: Make an application that uses sockets to connect to an FTP-server and downloads a file. No FTP-libraries allowed.

Dark theme should be the default everywhere

Teamate: Hey I'll checkout you're branch to see what you've got done today.
Me: ...Ok.
Few hours later Teammate forgets to change branch and overwrites all my code in my branch causing merge hell and creating hours of more work.
Me:...what in the f***?!