> When the intern claims that nginx is serving more request than apache

Thank you makers

*client calls*
"hello, we forgot the password to our WiFi router. Could you reset that for us?"

😐😶😮😅

"We host websites and servers sir, we don't control your router :)"

"Right, i thought so, nevermind!"

Well, that's a new one O.o

That time when I was wrong, the client was wrong, but my algorithm was right.

I'm proud of you son

I FUCKING MADE IT GUYS! I JUST PASSED THE HARDEST COURSE AT UNIVERSITY WHICH IS ABOUT DATA STRUCTURES AND ALGORITHMS! I DRAGGED THIS WITH ME A WHOLE YEAR AND I JUST GOT THE NOTIFICATION THAT I MADE IT. I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY GUYS I CANT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!

Made me chuckle!

I'll write something for wk64 next week.

I hate it when you just want to wash your hands and this happens!

Deadlines, deadlines everywhere.

!rant
.webDeveloper {
color: #C0FFEE;
}

My company

HTML5 !

Me and ma kid

During resignation discussion with delivery manager at my previous organisation, he told me that I should join a start up. (I was planning to do that, and he knew somehow.)

He warned me in weird concerning way that if I join a start up, I will always be in stress. I will have high BP. And sperm count will reduce. I might never be able to produce child. And similar scary stuff.

Weird bald dude scared me for second there.

PS - I did join the start up and my BP is fine and so is my sperm count.

Code I wrote: 15kb
NPM Modules: 198Mb

Every goddamn time.

Boss: Hey, how is the project going?
Me: promising. We have some basic functions working, but at this point it is more like a proof of concept.
Boss: Ah ok, I see.

Couple of days later...

Boss: I talked to a client who was very interested in the stuff you are just building. Made a really good deal! We need to be live by the end of the week.
Me: What?
Boss: What?

Tomorrow is my first day at work, im nervous and exited.

This is the state of desktop computing: When a web browser uses twice more RAM than a full virtual machine.

To be fair, I did have 5 windows with >10 tabs each, but still...

Bad handwriting is the most effective encryption

Wanted me to encrypt CSS with XML

I did a fucking scientific study about fucking rants and found a fucking high correlation between the usage of "fuck" and the number of fucking upvotes.

IE8 YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.

Is this enough to support devRant?

There's a new kind of cache i didn't know about.

Ever send a message and realize you ended the sentence with a semicolon?..

Whoops;

Dear people who complain about spending a whole night to find a tiny syntax error; Every time I read one of your rants, I feel like a part of me dies.

As a developer, your job is to create elegant optimized rivers of data, to puzzle with interesting algorithmic problems, to craft beautiful mappings from user input to computer storage and back.

You should strive to write code like a Michelangelo, not like a house painter.

You're arguing about indentation or getting annoyed by a project with braces on the same line as the method name. You're struggling with semicolons, misplaced braces or wrongly spelled keywords.

You're bitching about the medium of your paint, about the hardness of the marble -- when you should be lamenting the absence of your muse or the struggle to capture the essence of elegance in your work.

In other words:

Fix your fucking mindset, and fix your fucking tools. Don't fucking rant about your tabs and spaces. Stop fucking screaming how your bloated swiss-army-knife text editor is soooo much better than a purpose-built IDE, if it fails to draw something red and obnoxious around your fuck ups.

Thanks.

Friend texted me some binary.

Decided to impress him and decode it by hand.

Spent 5 minutes decoding "I eat ass".

Every new product these days has the tag line "powered by AI"

FUCK OFF

No it isn't.

A mass of "if" statements isn't AI!

Oh but I insist ...

Don't ever try writing code on a long flight. People LOSE THEIR SHIT.