How I feel working with code that's been worked on by at least three different teams at three different companies over the past couple of years and not a single person has left any comments or documentation.

FUCK THE WORDPRESS ECOSYSTEM AND FUCK THE FUCKING ONE CLICK DEPLOYMENT LIES OH YES WITH WITH BITNAMI OFFERS YOU SHIT AND FUCK YOU FUCKK YOUUUU SERIOUSLY FUCK YOU MADE ME AN ANGRY AND SICK FUCK.

Am I the only one that will have my headphones on (without music) just so people will not bother me?

I raise my middle finger:

- to the past developers of this 4 year old piece of garbage project that we are maintaining, who thought that using StringBuffers to construct html documents as a Http response as a good idea

- to the bosses and managers, who keeps on giving unreasonable deadlines yet passes accountability to others.

I gave you all a Linus Torvalds style fuck you!!

That is it, I decided to resign

A scammer called me today. They were saying that harmful files were moved to my computer and they needed to remove them. I don't think they are ever going to call me again.

S = scammer; M = me;

S: this is tech support we need access to your computer because we detected harmful files and need to remove them.
M: oh my! Hold on, let me go to my computer now. How can you access it?
S: we can just use RDP and delete the files. They are in a hidden folder that is encrypted so this Is the only way.
M: oh ok I believe you. Hm... it looks like my son only allows certain IP addresses to access our computers.. I don't know how to disable this so can you just email me your IP address?
S: Sure...

He then sends me his actual IP address... it doesn't even look like a proxy or VPN.

M: oh my I forgot that you need my password to login. It's really long and complicated... can I just email it to you?
S: Sure!!

I then tell him to hold on I have to find it that my "son" stored it somewhere.

At this time I'm taking a photo of my bare ass and attaching it to the email. I then say in the email "Please note what my job title is in my signature.. I just sent the FBI your name, phone number, email, and IP address. Please enjoy my bare ass, you'll see a lot of it in prison."

Me bug fixing

Today I made a decision to sign up devRant because I really want to enable "Join the Dark Side" in settings...

I was scrolling facebook and found something funny. I double tap on it.

I've just realised that I have a variable called fistTime instead of firstTime all over my code.

I'm pretty sure Shakespeare didn't say that.

You will never exit this fitness club. 😜

I asked my friend at work who is the weirdest one?

He said it's me. 😱

Just kidding. 😁
I don't have any friends.
😢😩😥

!Rant

Starting a new side project over the holidays been planning it for weeks. That blank project excitement feeling is one of the best. Love summoning code from the depths of the code underworld to do my bidding.

Happy holidays all.

When they make me do some css

How a Production Deployment feels like

A CMS raping WordPress so hard up the ass till there is no tomorrow. I hate that bastardized piece of fuck. “Hey I want you to fix my page and its wordpress. I pay 20 bucks.“ Well fuck you too sir. Wordpress is no cms you wanna be coders. Get back to your fucking photoshop and design something original! Every fucking wp page looks the same. Every “nice feature“ is some kind of monkeypatched workarround. No problem i set preview pictures for every post just to enable some weird slider to function.

I also love those buttfucked files with just a “require foo“ which also just requires “bar“. Drop that fuck. Implement autoloading. Nobody uses php4 anymore step into the future. “easy to learn“ fuck me and fuck you untill you vomit jizz! Clusterfucked spaghetticode thats easy, easy to put another rotten load of clusterfuck on top. Also those security features. I put an empty index.php to prevent directory traversal. N I C E! Stop using wordpress as CMS, its a blog engine. Nothing great has every been written on top of wordpress and never will. I dare you to deny everything related to it and if you are one of those designer guyd, you can gargle my jizz you fucknut!

Starting 2017 i will start a counter and rape every 10th Wordpress which gets abused as cms i encounter into oblivion on their 0,99$ webhosting shit.

Fuck this I'm so mad about that crap

The way to resolve the issues

In devrant, I am but a variable that is being incremented and decremented.

Honey, I love you, but plz I'm trying to focus

When I get home, my wife will probably tell me about all the fun things she did with the kids today. She'll tell me about all the frustrating things they did too and stories about how they made her almost pull her own hair out.

Then 20 minutes later she'll ask me how my day was and I'll say, "Oh, I dunno. I worked on a really hard SQL query today..."

When you have something in your clipboard but then press Ctrl+C instead of Ctrl+V and end up with a blank line.

FFFFFFFFuuck dealing with date code. This shit is ridiculous

LOL
http://robbomb.com/wp-content/...

- So, you're a backend or frontend developer?

+ Weekend developer.

Client: "My proposed deadline can't be met? Maybe we should go to your office and sit right next to you to see how you work."
Yeah right, that surely speeds things up. Even if the ever-changing requirements require at least triple of the time allowed.

Just 14 to go 😘

When you delete a block of code that you thought was useless

Just got a new phone, first app was this one!!

"Whenever I see a door that says push I pull first to prevent conflicts"

Laptop manufacturers--stop messing with the flippin' keyboard layout.