So the water dispenser in the kitchen does not have sparkling water, which I love. But there's one in the meeting room down the corridor that has sparkling water!

Like any regular employee of course I filed a request with site manager to upgrate the kitchen dispenser... NOT!

I wrote an app that sits in the taskbar when minimized and shows a traffic light with the status of the meeting room availability so I know when it's clear to go fetch me some of that bubbly goodness!

Applied for my first dev position last year. Interviewer asked for a code sample so I showed him some forum software I was working on at the time. I think my commit messages tanked the interview...

What a difference three lines of code can make. That's the typical case of "that seemed to be a good idea". I don't know how did I think it would work out on the long run. Next step will be reduceing the enourmous CPU usage as well.

What is that? Ada uses three spaces for indentation?
(ノꐦಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

Did anyone know shift+zz is also a way to exit vim other than :wq

How to fix any Linux PC
(From http://theoatmeal.com/blog/...)

How to take being a programmer
"Haha Windows is bad"
"Php more like phpepsi"
"When you were 12 I was coding in basic"
"I'm not like other programmers"
"Stack overflow comes to me for help"
"I don't use an ide because word 2007 has all the functionality I need"

The O(1) solution to any problem is to stop trying

Jjust got a notification from google drive that I'm out of space. Which is weird because I only have some documentation on there.

So I go looking around and find a folder of "Earth Porn". Apparently I had forgotten to stop a script I made about a year ago that saves all the /r/earthporn top posts.

Atleast I got screensavers for a life time though.

A software engineer was smoking...

A lady nearby asked him: "Can't you read the warnings? Smoking is injurous to health!"

He replied: "We are bothered only about errors, not warnings!"

Whenever I see a programming question here, I know someone's got devOverflow and stackRant completely mixed up!!!

Automatically pressing CTRL + S when filling out anything in a browser.
Why do I do this.

!Rant
Hey @dfox i found a weird issue when turning off and on the load avatar picture function one avatar picture got displayed but the other not. Reentering the rant fixed it.

If
your chrome's a toblerone and your mouth is full with foam
then
your code is error-prone.

Your own mistakes shape and forge you the most.

Lambda expressions in Java 8, because I love functional programming.

Best strategy for getting unstuck:
Wildly curse at the screen and start smashing your had against the keyboard. The ideas will come. Trust me!

The moment when you forgot to commit your work to git, managed to accidentally deleted it and recovery tools can't help you. FML I'm an idiot!

When your AI does cool stuff you never planned it to do. Yes I'm a wizard!

A game that produces content for itself.

One can measure how well you are doing right now just by counting the number of open StackOverflow tabs.

One day my mum got a call from a man claiming to be from Microsoft. He said there is something wrong with the computer and tried to make her install TeamViewer to "fix" it, but my mum didn't manage to install it for several hours until he gave up.
Sometimes knowing even less can save your PC.

Linux is only free if your time has no value.
- Jamie Zawinski

What color do you want the database?

Had a moment of where I froze and thought, "wait..."

-Applying for internship
-the "previous work/employee records" field is their
-can't leave it blank
-so did this "------" for its various fields of work position, start date of job, and date of job, salary, etc.
-warning says "can't leave that field empty"
HOW THE FUCK ONE APPLIES TO AN INTERNSHIP WITH WORK EXPERIENCE WHEN THERE IS NONE ?

Wait what? Nude.js is already a thing?
Yeah great, I'm not allowed to be a creative perv anymore.
Just great.

The truth has been spoken 😂

#wannaCry Ransomware:

US engineers trying to find antivirus

Europe engineers finding preventing tools

meanwhile...

Indian engineers already updated their resume with " Worked/Implemented fix for wannaCry ransomware"

Meanwhile...

Indian HR consultants asking for minimum 5 years experience in handling "wannacry"

And meanwhile....

in Hyderabad Ameerpet - people might be seeing banners of training institutes mentioning that they have trainers available with 10 years of industry experience on this.😜😜😝😝

Just when I need to update, Google says no 😒