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Joined devRant on 11/14/2016
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Hi, I am a Javascript apprentice. Can you help me with my project?
- Sure! What do you need?
Oh, it’s very simple, I just want to make a static webpage that shows a clock with the real time.
- Wait, why static? Why not dynamic?
I don’t know, I guess it’ll be easier.
- Well, maybe, but that’s boring, and if that’s boring you are not going to put in time, and if you’re not going to put in time, it’s going to be harder; so it’s better to start with something harder in order to make it easier.
You know that doesn’t make sense right?
- When you learn Javascript you’ll get it.
Okay, so I want to parse this date first to make the clock be universal for all the regions.
- You’re not going to do that by yourself right? You know what they say, don’t repeat yourself!
But it’s just two lines.
- Don’t reinvent the wheel!
Literally, Javascript has a built in library for t...
- One component per file!
I’m lost.
- It happens, and you’ll get lost managing your files as well. You should use Webpack or Browserify for managing your modules.
Doesn’t Javascript include that already?
- Yes, but some people still have previous versions of ECMAScript, so it wouldn’t be compatible.
What’s ECMAScript?
- Javascript
Why is it called ECMAScript then?
- It’s called both ways. Anyways, after you install Webpack to manage your modules, you still need a module and dependency manager, such as bower, or node package manager or yarn.
What does that have to do with my page?
- So you can install AngularJS.
What’s AngularJS?
- A Javascript framework that allows you to do complex stuff easily, such as two way data binding!
Oh, that’s great, so if I modify one sentence on a part of the page, it will automatically refresh the other part of the page which is related to the first one and viceversa?
- Exactly! Except two way data binding is not recommended, since you don’t want child components to edit the parent components of your app.
Then why make two way data binding in the first place?
- It’s backed up by Google. You just don’t get it do you?
I have installed AngularJS now, but it seems I have to redefine something called a... directive?
- AngularJS is old now, you should start using Angular, aka Angular 2.
But it’s the same name... wtf! Only 3 minutes have passed since we started talking, how are they in Angular 2 already?
- You mean 3.
2.
- 3.
4?
- 5.
6?
- Exactly.
Okay, I now know Angular 6.0, and use a component based architecture using only a one way data binding, I have read and started using the Design Patterns already described to solve my problem without reinventing the wheel using libraries such as lodash and D3 for a world map visualization of my clock as well as moment to parse the dates correctly. I also used ECMAScript 6 with Babel to secure backwards compatibility.
- That’s good.
Really?
- Yes, except you didn’t concatenate your html into templates that can be under a super Javascript file which can, then, be concatenated along all your Javascript files and finally be minimized in order to reduce latency. And automate all that process using Gulp while testing every single unit of your code using Jasmine or protractor or just the Angular built in unit tester.
I did.
- But did you use TypeScript?37 -
Am I the only one that will have my headphones on (without music) just so people will not bother me?19
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Most used lie you tell to client: -
Client: “Could you make the software do XYZ?”
Programmer: “No.”
What the programmer really wants to say:
“It’s software. Of course we could do it. But:
it would take a very long time,you can’t afford it,we can’t sell it to anyone else because it’s a terrible idea,by the time we finish it, you won’t want it anymore.”
“No” is just easier to say and is less insulting, especially when the client has a dozen of these great ideas.undefined and bla bla bla bla lie joke fun client programmer fuck i can not think of more tags. fuck13 -
This was in 1st semester and our CSE course went under some major course revision. Python was to be taught in place of C. Now the professor we had was very famous and we were excited to be in his class. But little did we knew he had no knowledge of Python at all. He used to tell the lab assistant to teach.It was so bad that I lost all interest in programming!!
But we all studied python later in our winter holidays for further courses.
Next semester we had OOP and this is what happened:
1st lab:
Professor(different): I expect you have basic knowledge in programming so I have uploaded.
Every question was related to structures in C.
In the same semester, we had data structures where we were 'expected' to know C or C++.
Later we came to know that Python was not going to be of any use in any course ! First semester went into dustbin.
/*
It was pretty long rant. Hope you didn't get bored :P
*/ -
Fuck eclipse....
Ugly, Heavy, Shitty, won't select tomcat 8.5 from its shitty server's list.....
Back to my lovely simple text editor and terminal... I can rely on them always.4 -
@dfox tiny bug report: when playing gifs, it first plays the first ~1s of the gif, then starts again and then plays normally.
I'm using Android 6.0.1.7 -
Do not continue reading if you value your life.
Visual fucking studio 2015 installation. MOTHERFUCKER !!!
OK new project will only work on VS2015. Need to download it. OK, go to MS website. Project works with community edition. Fucking great. Download the installer. Run the installer. MOTHERFUCKER DON'T OPEN THE FUCKING BROWSER TO THANK ME, YOU FUCKING FUCK. Ok...Wait to download the packages. One fucking eternity later download completes. FUCKING GREAT. Proceed to package installation. After two fucking hours installation progress bar stays the same. Google "vs 2015 installation stuck windows 7". MOTHERFUCKING BACKGROUND PROCESS IS FUCKING STUCK AND INSTALLATION DOES NOT CONTINUE. FUCK YOU. I'VE LOST TWO HOURS. OK, stop the process. Installation gets cancelled. Run the installer again. STOP THANKING ME YOU PIECE OF SHIT :@ OK, check again all downloaded packages. All good. Continue with installation. Installation completes. MOTHERFUCKER WHY YOU WANT TO RESTART THE WHOLE SYSTEM ? FUCK YOUR WINDOWS UPDATES. Ok, restart and be done with it. SSD to the rescue. Try to set up the project.
MOTHERFUCKER I DIDN'T INSTALL THE C++ PACKAGES. WTF WERE YOU DOING ALL THAT TIME? OK, run installer again and install C++ packages. I SWEAR TO GOD MICROSOFT, IF YOU THANK ME ONE MORE GODDAMN TIME, YOU'RE GETTING HATE MAIL.
Ok, installation completes. It's coding time. NO BITCH. VS2015 silently crashes after splash screen. :@@@ Google wtf is wrong again, turns out the C++ packages fuck shit up. Ok, pass some arguments to devenv.exe to reset. Restart VS. Ok, seems to be working now. Make a test project. Fucking awesome. Close VS and get the project files from perforce.
OK, files downloaded. Open VS again....
VS: "You're my bitch, you won't code today. Run from console and pass some shitty reset parameters"
YOU FUCKING FUCK. GO FUCK YOURSELF UP YOUR FUCKING ARSE. Ok, pass the parameters from console. Run again. Same "you're my bitch message" :@ OK, run with administrator rights, opens like charm. Run without admin rights again, "you're my bitch message". :@@@@@
Restart system, VS2015 finally opens project normally. Build project, 6934 errors.... :@ I'M DONE ! IM GOING BACK TO LINUX PROJECT. FUCK YOU ALL.18 -
I had to take the screenshot from my phone so as to not offend anybody in the office.undefined you can't be sure if an object is what it is double check when you paid by code quantity codebase in my company5
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Anyone else here working as a developer in a digital advertising agency? You end up working on lots of shitty projects and there is nothing harder than working on something you don't believe in :/5
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Sysadmin TIL:
Hiring PHP developers does not contribute to the quota of employees with disabilities.1 -
Just saw a rant about date formats between the US and every other country and saw this a few years ago. Seems appropriate26
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When I first started in IT 10 years ago I thought my coworker was pretty weird: every day she brought a coffee mug to the coffee machine and filled it by punching the "espresso" button 7 times. Little did I know this was just a sneak peak into my future...5
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In college, teacher teams us with other guy,
I tell him to do backend coding in JS
He says: Dude, What is JS?
Fu*k7