Tv hacker: I'll write code to hack their security cameras

2 seconds later

Tv hacker: I'm in

Me: go fuck yourself you fucking fuck

I think I'm going to become a lumberjack. I spend half of my days looking at logs.

Best error message I've found during my dev years.

"Error: An error has occurred!"

You don't say! :))

Coding has taught me that there are 10 kinds of people...

* Those who code for a living
* Those who want you to fix their laptop/printer/phone/etc.

I've written a lot of bad code, seen a lot, but attached is the most recent 'worst' I've seen.
What makes the situation worse/funny is:
1. The developer's code comment.
2. Check-in passed a code review.
3. The 'legacy code' was written last week.

2 years ago: Connection goes down at the office

Boss: -"Damnit, you are responsible to ensure uptime. Fix a redundant connection asap."

Me: Fixes redundant connection

Today: Connection goes down at the office, failover connection does not work.

Me: Calls ISP and asks what's happened.

ISP: -"Your boss cancelled the account 3 months ago"

...

Git....
alias such=git
alias very=git
alias wow=‘git status’
$wow
$ such commit
$ very push

I think server down time is because of rain 🌧

well lead software engineer.....

Who needs Legacy Code to f*ck up your day when you can't understand the code you wrote 2 weeks ago

Src: Telegram ->> programmerjokes
Old but fun LOL ;-)

Well yeah. He is right!

Sad but true :(

_Taken from a telegram channel_

When i was trying to be fullstack javascript developer..*sigh*

Got this from a recruiter:

We are looking for a **Senior Android Developer/Lead** at Philadelphia PA

Hiring Mode: Contract

Must have skills:

· 10-12 years mobile experience in developing Android applications
· Solid understanding of Android SDK on frameworks such as: UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation, Network Programming, etc.
· Good Knowledge on REST Ful API and JSON Parsing
· Good knowledge on multi-threaded environment and grand central dispatch
· Advanced object-oriented programming and knowledge of design patterns
· Ability to write clean, well-documented, object-oriented code
· Ability to work independently
· Experience with Agile Driven Development
· Up to date with the latest mobile technology and development trends
· Passion for software development- embracing every challenge with a drive to solve it
· Engaging communication skills

My response:

I am terribly sorry but I am completely not interested in working for anyone who might think that this is a job description for an Android engineer.

1. Android was released in September 2008 so finding anyone with 10 years experience now would have to be a Google engineer.
2. UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation are all iOS frameworks
3. Grand Central Dispatch is an iOS mechanism for multithreading and is not in Android
4. There are JSON parsing frameworks, no one does that by hand anymore

Please delete me from your emailing list.

So I just got one of those pop ups saying YOUR COMPUTER HAS BEEN HACKED.

I decided to call the number, while firing up a Linux virtual machine, running Linux Mint. I customized the home button to look like the Windows start menu logo, and proceeded to let that scammer connect to it.

He was so confused, considering the script he was reading off of was meant for windows. He opened up terminal, and started typing in "tree" and told me that's how many viruses I have.

😂😂😂

Well he did the right thing

This is what my manager tell me every friday 😊☺

UI vs UX

Story of an IT guy 🔫

Microsoft
(　^ω^)

I see lots of rants about lack of sleep, working through the night etc!

People you need to sleep an average of 7 hours a night your body needs this to stop ill health. Working through the night/mega long hours for nearly two years nearly caused me to have a breakdown.

Please be healthy! Working Long hours doesn't make you cool or a more valued employee.

Weekend weekend weekend. Yay!
After hard week at uni, took a day off and I am in bed since morning 😁
So I decided to find some kind of "dev social app" and got this. Not bad at all!

I am also fairly new at web development, using Python - at the moment Flask, later on Django so I am looking forward to meet some Flask/Django users here :)

And I just wanna add some wisdom here:)

</sarcasm>

Never deploy code on Friday the 13th.

I'm pretty sure Shakespeare didn't say that.

First day at work .... Excited
😃

I JUST GOT THE JOB OFFER!!! They are paying me well and with full benefits and they are going to pay for extended training on top of that!!

This internship was one of my better decisions! :)

Had a random dream last night where different JavaScript Frameworks were different flavour ice creams. No matter which one I tried I kept coming back to vanilla...