Today, i moved out from my parents house, perhaps the most adult thing I've done so far.

Sometimes I wish I could just disappear and have everyone forget about me and leave me the fuck alone for at least a day

Sometimes, after debugging/writing JS code, I sit back and cry 😢😭😭😭😭

When your vim using college keeps on telling you to start using vim. EVERY DAY for the last two weeks..

if (condition == true && condition != false)

Friend(non dev): Hey. Do you know how much it costs to maintain an app?

Me : Well that depends. What are you planning to do?

Friend: Something like Trivago. But small.

Me: That still doesn't tell me anything

Friend: Come on. Just give a number. How hard can it be?

Me: 42. *facepalm*

Friend: See wasn't that hard. Was it?

Me: *thinking* Don't correct him. Just let him be.

What was the biggest lies you heard about programming or programmers life.

Mine was: “programming is easy and high paying job.”
No it is not.

Alright people, let's make our own free, decentralized, p2p encrypted Internet.
How does that sound?

The more he use '$' the more he earns.
Just Saying :/

Me right now

Me: Hey Windows, I would love to use my Bluetooth headphones! Could you please turn on the Bluetooth?
Windows: Nope
Me: And why exactly?
Windows: I don’t know
Me: Then what I suppose to do?
Windows: Turn on Bluetooth
Me: Dude, but you can’t turn it on
Windows: I know
Me: So what the hell I suppose to do?
Windows: Maybe restart the computer?
Me: I’m downloading something man!
Windows: I don’t care

So I restarted it

What a weird age we live in!!!
We need to prove machines that we are not machines...
#captcha

I love it when a friend calls for help... i really do. But why the fuck it's all about hacking someone's account.

Honestly: I love my job. Every day. I get paid to do what I love to do. And when I get home after sometimes 11 hours of work, I turn on my notebook to do exactly what I did at work - just as a relaxation method.

Me: Goodnight!!

Brain: psst..

Me: What?

Brain: How can you just leave that piece of code behind? Unfinished?

How does your shell look? Are you a shell user?

I have never seen anything like this before...and I don't want to see this again.

the advantage of dating a non-dev: she thinks I'm incredibly smart when I describe what I'm working on, when in reality I have no clue what I'm doing 🙃

now that's a proper code rant (original from our code)

Algorithms strike again :D

By the way I really much agree on both rants. People asking questions that they not even once typed into Google. Disturbing my workflow every 5 minutes...

It happens at the worst times, if it wasn't for post it notes I'd be dead.

I'm so sorry if this has been posted before! I thought it was kinda funny, and ought to share it with you guys.

My friend said an intern designed this UI for an internal site.

No. Just... no

isRant = true

Working in a team with no Business Analyst assigned, moment when you realize that you spend at-least 3 hours every week sending old emails as a proof to business users that what we have developed is exactly what they fuckin' asked for in the first place

Honest developer...

The only way to feel comfortable coding on PHP is using classes and methods, I feel like home (Java)

I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF BUSINESS MOTHERFUCKERS USING TECHNICAL FUCKING BUZZWORDS LIKE THEY KNOW SHIT ABOUT TECH! THEY TRY TO BE FUCKING SMARTASSES AND ARGUE WITH DEVELOPERS LIKE GOD KNOWS WHY THIS FUCKING DOUCHE IS NOT THROWN IN /dev/null YET!

Ugh. He try to sound smart and argued with a unity game developer why the dev is not using "react" and "redux" in his game, purely because "since its the hype in 2016"... I was like really nigga?? FOR FUCKS SAKE Do some research before you say! Then he argued with a senior full-stack web developer on why they're using ES6 and not ES7, purely because he heard that ES7 is newer. When we try to explain we're not using decorator syntaxes since we use pure functions in our codebase, or how we haven't installed any ES7 babel plugins to transpile our code, he kept saying ES7 is newer and cooler and we must use it somehow... More to rant but i am fucking tired right now...

Monkey see, monkey do

You know you've made it when you can quickly catch programming crap in other website images.

This site promoted "Top 10 things that make you a good programmer."

Marvelous.