Just landed a new job as a developer for a company called NeuraLegion! They use Crystal on their stack, so guess what language I'll be using! But that's not even the best part. They hired me in part because they are using one of my open source Crystal libraries (a NLP library called Cadmium) and like the way I do things. So I am going to be getting paid to work on my FOSS libraries, whist sitting at home in my undies!

Holy shit I'm excited 😂😁

TLDR - you shouldn't expect common sense from idiots who have access to databases.

I joined a startup recently. I know startups are not known for their stable architecture, but this was next level stuff.
There is one prod mongodb server.
The db has 300 collections.
200 of those 300 collections are backups/test collections.
25 collections are used to store LOGS!! They decided to store millions of logs in a nosql db because setting up a mysql server requires effort, why do that when you've already set up mongodb. Lol 😂
Each field is indexed separately in the log.
1 collection is of 2 tb and has more than 1 billion records.
Out of the 1 billion records, 1 million records are required, the rest are obsolete. Each field has an index. Apparently the asshole DBA never knew there's something called capped collection or partial indexes.

Trying to get approval to clean up the db since 3 months, but fucking bureaucracy. Extremely high server costs plus every week the db goes down since some idiot runs a query on this mammoth collection. There's one single set of credentials for everything. Everyone from applications to interns use the same creds.
And the asshole DBA left, making me in charge of handling this shit now. I am trying to fix this but am stuck to get approval from business management. Devs like these make me feel sad that they have zero respect for their work and inability to listen to people trying to improve the system.

Going to leave this place really soon. No point in working somewhere where you are expected to show up for 8 hours, irrespective of whether you even switch on your laptop.
Wish me luck folks.

Webdev these days:

*{
display: flex;
}

Desperately need a job, but seems like I'm unemployable. 🙃

Just started work at this new company as a backend developer and immediately got into a heated argument with one of the front end guys.

Poor guy has been a front end developer for 5 years and doesn't know how to submit a form input as an array.

FML

WWDC was last night. Joined my companies "iOS" slack channel this morning expecting to see lots of activity about SwiftUI, Combine, Federated Login, New iPad updates ... but no. The only comment

"Does anyone else feel like the event artwork is lazy and uninspired?"

... I am just fundamentally in the wrong company

Turns out it’s quite annoyingly difficult to create a 5GB txt file titled “test.txt”

I was supposed to learn go today, I’m on my way to the beach ...

Someone’s explaining an SQL injection in the train

You are always the bad dev in someone's else story

Apple Just Announced It's Selling a Mac Monitor Stand for $999

..and monitor does not come with a stand.

My use of linux could legally drink now, in the US. And even after 21 years, I still love it more all the time.

Locked out of machine...
Email to open ticket...
Ticket confiration in email call number pls...
Calls number, dial options menu...
Option 3 ... Presses option 3...
Please leave a voicemail describing your issue...

Rinse repeat

I just realized that i'm the 3rd programmer on the male side of my family to work for the same company the same job! Is this a programmer lineage? 😂😂

I am a Full-Stack Developer and recently had a talk with my boss about how the push notifications work and he is pretty convinced that it has something to do with the IMEI number of the phone, he being a person with a non technical background makes it even more difficult for me to explain stuff to him :/

How do you even come up with shit like this?

This is the problem with iot

Found on r/starterpacks

Today, during an update from senior management, I was casually sitting in the corner filling in my CV to get out of here lol.

That moment, when you're on a hurry and hit "update now" by mistake. Been 45 minutes staring at the screen

Me: "I wanna mod Ikemen so it can have tag presets, a replay recording manager, a player card for online games, a gallery,..."
Windows: takes a whole day to update
Me: "I wanna mod Ikemen so it runs on Ubuntu"