From r/linuxmasterrace (u/KeithKatar)

How many times has this conversation happened at your workplace?

Arch Linux irl

True for a lot of industries.

found on twitter - @JS_Cheerleader

So I had an interview with Amazon, I had 2 technical rounds and 2 managerial rounds. Now I am waiting for the HR to call, this guy is not picking up the call or replying to my emails. Its almost 3 days now and I am FREAKING OUT!!

How difficult is it to tell the candidate that the application is in progress/accepted or you have been rejected!!!

HR PEOPLE :(

A comprehensive guide to saving the princess with different programming languages...

How internet works 😇😇

0100100001100101011011000110110001101111001011000010000001110100011010000110000101101110011010110010000001111001011011110111010100100000011001100110111101110010001000000111011101100001011100110111010001101001011011100110011100100000011110010110111101110101011100100010000001110100011010010110110101100101

Windows...

A guide to estimations.

1) don’t give an immediate answer. The first “timeframe” you give will be held against you and will result in overtime and working weekends.

2) think of a relevant piece of work and the time that took.

2.1) if it’s something you haven’t done before, add some adequate research time.

3) allow half a day of testing for every day of development.

4) add a day as buffer - this is good for on the fly bug fixes

5) calculate time

6) now give an educated estimate.

7) this should take you 5 seconds to get through mentally.

8) if scope creep occurs: goto:1

Huge developer convention with 4 speakers today.

Google Cloud,
AWS Amazon,
A government innovation team,
and Me!

I'm freaking out.
Wish me luck, I need it...

Sooo my friend asked my to become more active on steam and i did something about it! I'm going to be become the most activities steam user!

UTF-8 gone wrong

Sir, please write a simple program, just a very basic one.

me: Writes Hello World in Python

Didnt get the job.

Not a coding test, but:

Them: So you are interviewing for a programmer opening. Do you like programming?

Me: yes.

Them: do you make logos?

Me: ...I can...?

Them: good because you won't always be writing code here.

Me: I'm out.

i, j and k declared as globals. You fucking moron.

So wife just sent me this.

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

NaN shares. Facebook ☺️

I got my first job as a programmer... for a salary twice as big as we had at home for four people. I'm f***ing excited!

Wish me luck :)

#Weird incidents with a designer

This girl texted me a picture of her newly painted dark-greyish nails

Her: what do you think is this color?

Me: #222222

That’s how I can manage 10 projects as same time. Trust me.

Who's ready for some horror?

Today I decommissioned an old server, that had an uptime of 4130 days.

Fuck docker documentation.

I have a rule made by myself. I call it "550 line".
If a class have more than 500 or a method more than 50 line, something is wrong.
(Is there any better rule? Tell if there is some)

Customer: I need a program that can do this.
Me: Okay. We can do this. But we recommend you a gui.
Customer: Oh I don‘t need a gui. We have Windows.
Me: you will need a gui. Here you are a dummy programme without a gui. Try it out. Find out yourself.
Customer: I trust you. Dummy is fine. But it’s not ready yet, right?
Me: It’s just a dummy to show you what it means, having ni gui for that.
Customer: all fine i need this programme. Go ahead.
Me codes and silently makes one build with gui... ;) xou know what comes:
Me: here you are your programme.
Customer: how to use it? It is cryptic. A black window opens. I cannot click. The manual is full of text i habve to type. I don’t understand!?
Me: you need a gui.
Customer: Oh. I thought since windows 3.11 everything has one...
Me: pay me bucks I make you the gui.
C: meh. Okay here you are bucks.
Me: take this
C: wow so fast. This is cool. Take my money.

This sort of cognitive dissonance I will never understand. In first case ignoring my hints. In second recognizing my hints were true. But in third forgetting own stupidness and paying me extra-extra for what you ignored? Ethically I hated you so much for ignoring me, that I took your money, but you could have gotten me blaming me not selling you a gui... :D

Have a nice weekend

Can we please stop with this shit... its seriously annoying...
Like "master" and "slave" are literally the perfect terminology to explain what is being described... please leave ideology at home...

Interview

HR: So .. tell us .. where do you see our AI acting in 5 years?

ME: Doing your job minus the stupid questions.

*silence*

Boss breaks out in laughter.
"Oh boy you're hired"