If Adobe would just release their products on Linux I would literally have no reason to ever use Windows again...

When I hear sales guy using technical terms in the wrong context while doing his sales pitch to a client...

When my co-workers thinks it is fun to add this to my bashrc when i was away:

alias cd='exit'

Too tired of explaining to my dad, that he does not have to double-click everything in his browser.

Don't make rushed decisions

The 1st of July, it'll be a year ago since my father passed away.

I made him a promise as he explicitly told me; "Please grow our company, I wouldn't have put you in the CTO position if you sucked at what you do" - so I said I would keep pushing the boundaries.

As per now we've officially broken our set target. Our revenue thus far in 6 months of time has reached to last years total revenue. I take great comfort in knowing that he would have been god dang proud.

July the 1st will be a day with both a smile and a tear. Had to get this off my chest!

I used to think my coworkers are stupid. Now I believe they are purposely making mistakes just to piss me off.

Never underestimate the end user

That moment you do "close all tabs" after solving a bug 🐛

I explained my latest project to a non developer friend. I told him I'm almost done with the code, now I just need to debug and get it ready for production.

"Why don't you write code that doesn't have any bugs?"

"Holy shit! I never thought about that! Thank you so much, I'll make sure to write bug free code from now on".

I have my own secret script hidden in a /batcave dir on the production servers. It fixes everything the other devs usually manage to screw up.
I call it Batman.bat

Two types of programmers:
1. :wq
2. ctrl + s

Sometimes I name my project "suicide" so that when I do a git commit I could say that I committed suicide.

This is way too true.

"It's compiling"

The guy who kept asking for my help... it's not that I have a problem with that, but his problems could be solved with a very simple Google search.

Relabel ftw!

Things invented by the devil himself:
- charsets
- timezones

When someone else uses your idea.

When you made a commit that deletes more code than what it adds. And the features are still the same 🎉

Major requirement of becoming a developer is being a good googler