My girlfriend dumped me after I named a class after her. She felt I treated her like an object.

That moment when

CS Professor: “What M word is the black hole to all productivity?”

Student: “Management”

CS Professor: “Was going to say meetings but that’s better”

Girl: "hey"

My Brain:
java.lang.NullPointerException:
at net.brain.functions.Talk.retrieveSpeech(Talk.java:2978)
at net.brain.functions.Talk.createFlirtyResponse(Talk.java:3132)

Me: null

*Girl walks away*

Password field unique in database.

When your coffee supplier won't let you order < 5. Client side validation wins again.

Ahhhhhhhhhhh I live for that moment when after debugging, you can finally close all those tabs one by one until the only one left is devrant.io 😎

HAHAHAHAHA

I know a brilliant joke about UDP but you might not get it..

Working at PornHub

js validation

Best one...

Gary's a prick

Google Assistant Python SDK has been published ten days ago. Just in time, I've integrated it in AlexaPi, so now everybody can have Alexa AND Google Home running on one Raspberry Pi 😎

https://github.com/xtools-at/...

!rant
If repost === true
print ("sorry")
else
print ("😂")

Thanks: twitter@nixcraft

What kind of ad is this supposed to be? 😂

"Knock knock"
"Sorry"
"Knock"
"Sorry"
"kNoCk KnOcK"
"Sorry"

-Brute Force Attack

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

Entering BIOS be like

!rant
I had to do this xD

​​​​​​

"Knock, Knock",
"Knock, Knock",
"Knock, Knock",
"Who's..."
"Knock, Knock",
"Knock, Knock",
"there?"

- DDoS Atack

Difference between 0 and NULL.

!rant
400 Nerf bullets just arrived... Office is gonna become a war zone...

This dude is definitely going places. The entire code is documented like that. 👌🏻

Can't argue with that

Knock.
Knock.
Knock knock.
Knock knock knock.
Knock knock knock knock knock.

Who's there?

Fibonacci.

　
　
　

H̶͙̠͇̹̰͉̣̠̯͎̙̫͖̜̗̮͍̰͒ͧ̉̑̆̏̅̏̀̕͟͝a̞̮̠̱̰͚̲̩̟͕̣̱͇̯̦͎͕̪͓ͯ͐͗̿ͨ͒̈ͩ̃̉̍ͨ̍͑́̚c̻̮̰̳̜̟͓͕̱̠̰̦̾̽͌̋͆ͣͪ̈̈ͦ̍ͮ̃̒̔̂ͪ̒́̚ķ̴̱̳͓̥̫̭̹͖̥̦͚̙̼̒ͯ͌ͬͬ̐̓͐ͮ̂͊̃̀̎ͣ̅́eͬ̊̿̐͂ͦ̎̄̂̎̈ͦͥͬ̀͏͖͍͙͉͓͓̙͍̪ͅr̞̳̪̩̪̼̼̱͎̘͙̫̞͔̖͎̙̓ͦ͌͋͞͝ͅm̶͔̖̳͎̗͑ͫͤͭ̅̀̀ͨ̒̒ả̴̬̜͖̹͖͛͋̎͂͆̓̋͋̇͊ͬ̿̉ͥͤ̆n̨̰̬̩̫̠͓̈̅͑̅ͦ̐ͪ̓͂̎̀̚̚̚

　
　

@dfox @trogus How about ++ milestones?
F.e.:
404 ++'s: “Error 404“
255 ++'s: “256 Bytes“
69 ++'s: (Well you know...)
And so on... (be creative)

I found a really neat way to toggle two implementations using C style multiline comments.

https://twitter.com/_Gaeel_/status/...