I've always wanted to build an underground bunker for storms, to hide from my unstable ex girlfriend, and lulz, so I am. The hardest part isn't the digging or the structure, it's finding a way to ensure I'll still have internet.

:))))))

And when I was busy wasting my time on my girlfriend who is my ex now, my friends were busy coding an AI chat-bot. Now, I use their chat-bot to talk to when lonely.

Moral :
Girlfriends ditch you.... code doesn't. Love code.

*dev wants to find FFmpeg docs
*dev starts typing "FF"
*SwiftKey reveals dev's true personality

*Lists packages with name "weechat"
1 result
*Tries to start package*
*Says package is not installed*
Wat

Who says a dev doesn't go outside? I barely stay somewhere indoor more than a couple of hours.
Now that everyone is sharing their setups:

*Working on personal project*

Don't get excited about another project
Don't get excited about another project
Don't get excited about another project
Don't get excited about another project

...DAMNIT

Comment your own code.

"But nobody except me will see..."

COMMENT YOUR OWN CODE!!!

This! Premature optimization is the mother of all evil.

When you are trying to debug Android apps and need to find small string in that huge spam logcat is giving you...

Learned Lua for an hour, I think its a fun language to mess around, but i’m still figuring out what i’m going to use it for...

Lesson learnt :
Never ever do "rm -rf <pattern>" without doing "ls <pattern>" first.
I had to delete all the contents of my current directory.
I did "rm -rf /*" instead of "rm -rf ./*".

Some Cable porn...

Who would have thought that slack would be very helpful on a team project. We've been using messenger all the time. Damn it. Where r u during my college days.

Feels so good when your PR gets merged

I fucked up hard for the first time yesterday at work.

Came in and expected a huge speech from the bossman.

He called me to his office:

Explained me where I went wrong and what I should do next time with a big smile on his face!

My company provides license for Intellij IDEA Ultimate but I've customised my Vim for development according to my convenience so I use Vim instead.

Except for changing variable names across multiple files. IDEA's refactoring is the only thing I am using IDEA for.

Me at the office, Boss calling me by phone..

Boss: Hi, I need a new Build of XX Android app for another client.. set the base address at x.x.x.x and send me an APK file

Me: OK, I will do it.

Boss: can you do it in 5 minutes?

Me: Sure, it's simple..

Android Studio: You think it's simple !
* Indexing Files
* Sync Project
* Gradle Build
* Indexing....
* Some f* tasks

Oh kill me now !!

This is my collection of geeky stickers! Do you like it? :)

Samsung S9 benchmarks: slower than a 2 year old iPhone, more expensive than current:

https://twitter.com/codinghorror/...

Travelled 4 hours to an interview to do a JavaScript paper test with questions copied from W3C academy👌

Boss man: your code has issues , you should strive to have lesser bugs.

Me: GTA was made due to a bug in the their code.
*mic drop, leaves office, clapping heard in background*

😂

Having fun, fellow northern europeans?

So Python doesn't have switch-case statement... I feel so dirty having to use multiple if-elif-else

*sigh*

This is from my days of running a rather large (for its time) Minecraft server. A few of our best admins were given access to the server console. For extra security, we also had a second login stage in-game using a command (in case their accounts were compromised). We even had a fairly strict password strength policy.
But all of that was defeated by a slightly too stiff SHIFT key. See, in-game commands were typed in chat, prefixed with a slash -- SHIFT+7 on German-ish keyboards. And so, when logging in, one of our head admins didn't realize his SHIFT key didn't register and proudly broadcast to the server "[Admin] username: 7login hisPasswordHere".
This was immediately noticed by the owner of a 'rival' server who was trying to copy some cool thing that we had. He jumped onto the console that he found in an nmap scan a week prior (a scan that I detected and he denied), promoted himself to admin and proceeded to wreak havoc.
I got a call, 10-ish minutes later, that "everything was literally on fire". I immediately rolled everything back (half-hourly backups ftw) and killed the console just in case.
The best part was the Skype call with that admin that followed. I wasn't too angry, but I did want him to suffer a little, so I didn't immediately tell him that we had good backups. He thought he'd brought the downfall of our server. I'm pretty sure he cried.

How I feel as a developer...

No code on paper and no flipping MS office crap.

I found and bought this floppy disk in an old supermarket. This brings back my memories where flash drive are so expensive I can only afford to buy multiple floppy disk.

I lost a friend today😭.

He wanted to checkout my MacBook Pro, because he was thinking about buying one.

So I pulled mine out of my backpack, and turned it on.. Then windows 10 popped up!

I looked at him in shock like I just got caught watching porn. I tried to explain to him “it’s not what you think! I had to install it to use Microsoft Project!

He just looked at me in disgust, shaking his head, and walked away....

Just saw someone at school with a devRant sticker on his laptop 😃