I NEED MY SLEEP FFS!!! It is 06:20 in the morning and I am already on the train to work because one of our managers felt the need to plan a meeting from 08:00 on monday morning to explain EXACTLY why something does not work.
Needless to say that she is no dev (or has technical know how)!
But the best part is:
THE INVITATION FOR THE MEETING WAS SEND OUT FRIDAY EVENING SO THERE IS NO PREPARATION-TIME WHATSOEVER!!!
Fuck

When your team members report a bug in my code, when they actually changed the specs and didn't tell me 😳

10 years in dev and can't seem to keep up with all these languages. I learn one forget the other. Mix up syntax. Features removed or added.
Still use cheat sheets which I update as the languages change.
Just me or everyone else?

Can someone help me with this stackoverflow error?

It's finally dry enough to apply this. Thanks!!

Anyone else put in headphones with absolutely no intention of listening to anything, just to make people less likely to bother you?

the happy moment when you get turned down by agencies over the phone, when they "don't think you are what they are looking for" although you have 4 years commercial experience and are 23 years old, by an agent that fancies the term API and WordPress... fml

programming is not a piece of cake that you come and eat.
friend of mine thinks programming is so simple.
fuck you who think its easy it takes hours of dedication

client: we want something like Facebook
programmer: it was nice meeting you.*walks away*

Code review

Finaly they get it

yes i am a developer, no i have not hacked facebook.

Ctrl + C and Ctrl + V have saved more lives than Batman and Robin

Never buy crappy, consumer-grade SSDs for use in production servers/RAIDs. This might sound obvious but at the company I used to work for, through a series of bad decisions by management and cheapness, we ended up with the cheapest consumer SSDs you can imagine powering all of our storage.

This turned into a nightmare spanning years of failed hard drives and a continues cycle of ridiculousness. Drive failed after a few days, gets taken out, sent back to manufacturer and then replaced with another equally crappy drive destined to fail within days/weeks.

Our ops people were going to the data center multiple times per week to replace failed drives. Lesson I learned: cheaping out on system-critical hardware and software can have long standing consequences and in the end usually doesn't end up actually saving money when you account for time employees have to spend dealing with issues that result from it.

Trying to unit test legacy code with lots of static methods suuccks!

Does anyone else suddenly lose the ability to type properly as soon as someone is watching/pairing?

It's always the developer's fault

devRant must thank TNW for bringing so many new users here.

when there is no coffee left...

client "we want x, y and z"

developer "ok that's fine they'll cost this much"

client "why will they cost, they won't take you THAT long to do"

Good one :D

familiar?

When a recruiter puts Java in a job spec when they mean JavaScript

"Let's mark every issue a high priority so it all gets done faster."