Girlfriend: What's your biggest fear?

Me: That machines take over the world.

Girlfriend: What?

Toaster: What?

"I will create a very useful library and won't document it" - said every developer ever.

This fucking snapcraft is making me lose my goddamn mind.

Boss: “Do you think you can work on Saturday? We really need the help.”

Me: “Yes, of course.”

Boss: “Great, thank you.”

Me: “I’ll probably be late, though, as public transport is slow on the weekends.”

Boss: “Okay, when do you think you will be at the office?”

Me: “Monday”.

Can anyone tell me what all things a developer should follow in order to be upto date. It's just too long of a thing.
I have been a back end developer, became a big data developer, then moving to becoming a full stack developer. Now I don't know who I am anymore.

And now i'm feeling guilty every time i call new Guid().

I don't know which is the worst : chmod 777, sudo on windows or my skills with drawing apps

Fuck those who cover their incompetence with complexity. Fuck those who fall for their shitty tricks. Fuck you for depriving me of any sense of accomplishment with overcomplicating everything to show how smart you are when you are not. Fuck you for creating a culture of overthinking egoism instead of shipping and finding out who was right. FUCK YOU IN THE ASS YOU BIKESHEDDING, MOTHERFUCKING CUNTS!

😂😂😂

"Sometimes you just gotta see your code from another angle"

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE !!!!

and i only need one more upvote to get a stress ball !

Code never lies... Comments sometimes do... 💻💻

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

🎶 He's making a list
He's testing it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behavior="nice"
SQL-clause is coming
To town. 🎶

R, matey

Q: Why did the databases administrator leave his wife?

A: She had one-to-many relationship

Well.. 😂

I didn't get the job.

Co-worker: I don't get it, what's devrant about?
Me: rant about co-worker

So, I just have broken visual studio?

couse, why suffer alone..

Love devRant it's like Twitter for geeks. Don't need to follow anyone and no politics.

After moving to SSD I noticed I'm too slow for my computer. When it finishes working I can feel it asking me "you done thinking m8?"

How did I learn to program?
It's the funniest story actually.
I studied Computer Engineering where I took programming courses.

My car's license plate:

Looking for a job as a deveoper be like:

Job title: car driver

Job requirements: professional skills in driving normal- and heavy-freight cars, buses and trucks, trolley buses, trams, subways, tractors, shovel diggers, contemporary light and heavy tanks currently in use by NATO countries.

Skills in rally and extreme driving are obligatory!
Formula-1 driving experience is a plus.

Knowledge and experience in repairing of piston and rotor/Wankel engines, automatic and manual transmissions, ignition systems, board computer, ABS, ABD, GPS and car-audio systems by world-known manufacturers - obligatory!

Experience with car-painting and tinsmith tasks is a plus.

The applicants must have certificates by BMW, General Motors and Bosch, but not older than two years.

Compensation: $15-$20/hour, depends on the interview result.

Education requirements: Bachelor's Degree of Engineering.

I like how nano not only shows you unnecessary whitespaces, it throws them in your face and and screams "YOU SEE THAT? WHAT IS THIS SHIT? DELETE THIS DISGRACE TO CLEAN INDENTED CODE!"

I've never learned how to program : I'm still learning.

Even if it's said 5 years of experience on my resume, I feel like I'll be a never-ending student.

That all too familiar cross road, I have an evening to code, I have some key features of a large (work related) project to carry on with but I also have more side projects than I can possibly complete.

Side project or work project? I seem to find myself here most evenings.

Manager: we need to design an admin system for a veterinary centre

Dev: ok, this is it, remember your training

namespace Vetcentre{
class Dog : Animal {

}
}