Hahaha

We are soldiers, we don't ask questions - we take orders!

VIM is complicated AF, but it can be modded for just about any purpose.

We'd just finished a refactor of the gRPC strategy. Upgraded all the containers and services to .Net core 3, pushed a number of perf changes to the base layer and a custom adaptive thread scheduler with a heuristic analyzer to adjust between various strategies.

Went from 1.7M requests/s on 4 cores and 8gb ram to almost 8M requests/s on the same, ended up having to split everything out distributed 2 core instances because we were bottlenecking against 10gb/e bandwidth in AWS.

Dev(null networking knowledge): -"i've already deployed the web but it isn't up."

Boss(strong networking skills): Found port 80 blocked.
-Option A: open port 80.
-Option B: disable firewall.
Choose option B.

Me:😐(poker face)

Wish I knew about this lovely community a few years ago, when a dev in my team asked for help because they couldn't understand why their function was only returning one string... Only you guys would understand my pain when I saw this...

string SomeShitStringMethod()
{
<do stuff>
return string1;

<do stuff>
return string2;

<do stuff>
return string3;
}

>_______<

I wonder how long before people get twitchy thinking I’m hacking just running some database load tests

2018 goal :
- Learn Python as a first language.

Yeah! Linux users are smart 😎😎😎

#user_who_got_talent_to_fuck_our_work

"Our last lead-developer was a real smart guy, he modernized the legacy code and we all learned a lot from him"

I need a beer, and a shotgun.

#TipOfTheDay 😂😂😂

I became a professional C++ developer in 1993. Best year of my life

Dev rant = a better version of Twitter for developers :D

much hacking. wow.

When people leave their computers unlocked.