Until now I've never thought of putting stickers on my laptop. Always preferred it to be clean, but with all those cool stickers on all your laptops... It made me wanna put as many stickers as possible and since devRant stickers looked lonely, I've decided to print some of my own. On other side I wantedthem to be useful for me so I grabbed a handful of NFC stickers and designed links and required shortcuts for my phones to run with them on touch. for example if I need a hotspot on my mobile to be activated quickly, I just put my phone against the WIFI sticker and bingo! And yes, devRant logo opens devRant app))

you know you've looked into too many languages if you have to google how to properly initialize a array in java after 5+ years coding

<rant>
*Rules For Work*

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.

2. If it's really a rush job, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps. Even better, hover behind me, and advise me at every keystroke.

3. Always leave without telling anyone where you're going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.

4. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books, or supplies, don't open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and opening doors with no arms is good training in case I should ever be injured and lose all use of my limbs.

5. If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is priority. I am psychic.

6. Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.

7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.

8. If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.

9. If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing me with useful information.

10. Never introduce me to the people you're with. I have no right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.

11. Be nice to me only when the job I'm doing for you could really change your life and send you straight to manager's hell.

12. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so many taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.

13. Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been. Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase. I'm not here for the money anyway.

</rant>

"Failure is not an option -- it comes bundled with Windows."

when it's the weekend and you forgot your laptop charger at work

A: Done job for today.
B: Let me check your code.
A: Sure.
B: Only 6 lines of code in a day?
A: Yup, 6 line of code is better than 1000 thousand line that can do the same thing.
B: 😑😑😑

When your parents text you 'you work on the Internet, can you fix my WiFi?'

When you know you should be writing your tests first, then your code. But you secretly do it the other way round anyway.

You haven't coded long enough if you don't use f.lux

I work with someone who uses the mouse to click on the save button to save a file. To give you the gravity of the situation, it's like working with IE

You might as well just kill yourself right now.

Safari : the new internet explorer! ❤️

Does anyone else find themselves dreaming solutions to their code?

https://github.com/nvbn/thefuck

What a time to be alive.

don't drink and root. fml

Client on his 40-inch 4K monitor: "Why is there so much white space on this page?"

Me: "Mobile traffic accounts for 70% of traffic..."

Client: "Can we just make it a little more interesting?"

Trying to explain an awesome block of code logic you came up with and how it streamlined everything.. And your partner be like.... Thats cute dear

How did the Stack Overflow developers debug their code?!? :O

Damn it! that feeling...

Testing my project

To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.

does anyone else's boss get pissed off when you can't fix printers/ internet/phone issues? somehow being a Web developer makes you have a special connection with technology apparently

My roommate: why do you look so mad.

Me: stupid program is broke

My roommate: didn't you fix it yesterday?

Me: yes. I broke some thing else

Roommate: oh on a different project?

Me: nope same one.

Roommate: [walks away more confused than when the conversation started]

When you're deep into coding and every 15 mins a project manager taps you on the shoulder to see how it's going.

Design team gets 3 monts to wireframe, dev team gets 3 weeks to complete the project. IT'S MAGIC #headbang

Real life cycle of programmers...

Every time :D

coffee Into Code

When you build a beautiful set of Sass files with grunt/gulp tasks, hand it off to another developer who makes all their changes in the compiled css.

You are no match!